Carver (to Starling): Thank you, Miss Starling. We're starting to get our appetite back, Miss.
Starling (to Carver): I do what I can, sir. Can I get you anything else, sir?
Carver (to Starling): No. We are... we are as well as can be expected, Miss Starling. A bit restless, but quite well.
Starling (to Carver): I'll be back shortly, sir. I need to get some more supplies.
Carver (to Starling): Of course, Miss. We'll wait here, shall we, Miss?
Starling (to Carver): ... Oh. Very funny, sir.
Carver (to Starling): Thank you, miss. We've been practicing. Other Carver has a theory about appearing more "human," Miss.
At a motel off I-95N:
Marlena: ... Why does my mouth feel like I licked a carpet? Oh right... beer.
A short time later
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Morning. How you feeling? I got you... It's brown and in a styrofoam cup. Pretend it's coffee.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Heh. Probably, not as bad as I look. That bed was fucking uncomfortable. Did you have a spring poking you in the back, too?
Nathaniel (to Marlena): I was half convinced there was a fucking porcupine shoved under the mattress. I had to keep repeating to myself, it's this the car or the fucking panty chair. I'm ready to get going whenever you are.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Let's go, then. We should be home by this afternoon if we hit the road now. Oh, and to ease your mind, you didn't once try to touch me in your sleep & if you did it was fucking minor... Which is slightly fucking insulting, if you ask me? :-P
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Yeah. I'm sure you're fucking heartbroken, and your self esteem hinges on whether or not queer guys feel you up in your sleep. Want me to fucking do it right now? :-P
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Sure, go for it... Of course, the poor front desk clerk is probably going to wonder what the fuck is going on out here. :-P
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Ha ha ha! Alright, alright. You fucking called my bluff. Stop thrusting your goddamn tits at me!
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Heh... I win.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Yeah, yeah. You're the biggest pervert. You win whaddya want? A cookie and a goddamn crown? Heh… No! Get off! Get the fuck away from me, you fucker!
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Don't fucking run away! I just want to LURVE you!
Nathaniel (to Marlena): If you really wanna make River jealous, go hug on some hetero boy. It'll work better. :-P Ouch!
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Jackass. I don't have any need to make River fucking jealous.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): No shit you don't need to make him jealous. Believe me, I know. I'm the one he asks about you all the fucking time at work.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): What? That doesn't sound like him at all... Seriously, he thinks I'm trying to make him jealous?
Nathaniel (to Marlena): No, no, no. Not that. I mean, you don't have to try to get him on the hook, dumbass. You already got him there. And before you ask, I don't mean that in a BAD way. I just mean he's hung up on you. He talks about you. A lot. A fucking lot
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Shit. I didn't want him on the hook. I just didn't want it to be fucking easy to get back together with me... He really hurt me when he took off... god, I'm a fucking asshole.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): No you're fucking not. Being an asshole would be stringing him along, and then dumping him. You're allowed not to fucking trust him. He acted like a fucking dick. He's gotta deal with the fucking consequences.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): You're right... I was thinking that when we got home, I'd ask him out on a date. I miss that big dumb idiot.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Heh. He'll be thrilled. Oh Jesus. You realized he's gonna be un-fucking-bearable now. You know that, right? Lisbeth might ACTUALLY kill him.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Nah, I'm gonna fucking talk to her. Mom said she's been making his life hell whenever they have a crossover shift... She really needs to get the fuck over it. Even, if River didn't come back, she & I were never going to seriously date. It's just not my fucking thing.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Huh... Had she dated a lot of girls before you?
Marlena (to Nathaniel): I don't think so. I don't think she really dated much at all before the few times we went out. And, we only went out for maybe a month before I realized that girls just weren't my thing no matter how hard I tried.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Heh. Yeah. I thought that might be the fucking problem. She'll get over it eventually, but not as quick as you like, I'll bet.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Heh. And, here I was hoping for a fucking drama free relationship. Lucky me.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Lucky you. When you're queer, that first fucking relationship can be tough, you know? Especially if you, or your folks, aren't crazy about the idea of having a gay or a bi kid. Heh. So when you finally end up with someone, it gets intense and possessive, and just fucking weird sometimes. It's the reason Tim and I were together as long as we were.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Uh, I hate to fucking break it to you but I don't think that's just a queer thing... I think that's an everybody thing.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Ha ha ha! Yeah. Probably. But lemme tell you, when you find one other queer kid your age in your small ass town of 3,000 people, you better believe you think right then and there you'll be with that fucker for the rest of your like. Heh. You don't think you have any other fucking choice in the matter, cause you don't exactly have a lot of fucking options. With Lisbeth, maybe it's just YOUR fine ass she can't get enough of. :-P
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Thanks...
A couple hours later:
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Looks like we've only got an hour more on the road.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Thank fucking god. I'm ready to be fucking home. Heh. And I'm sure you're ready to be outta the fucking car with me.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Yeah, you're a real fucking terrible travel companion. :-p
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Are you kidding? I'm the worst. I took a picture of you in that sombrero at South of the Border and everything.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Oh well, I got one of you on that fucking white buffalo so we're even.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Heh. Fair fucking enough. Shit. We're almost there, aren't we? ... I really wish I could have fixed all this shit.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): Yeah.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Honestly, I didn't think I would, but I guessed I hoped that my parents loved me enough not to act like HUGE fucking dicks. But, whatever. They wanna be petty fuckers, I can't fucking stop them.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): It's okay, Nate. It'll work out. I don't know how or when, but it will. You gotta have fucking faith... Well, in the fact that Aunt Poppy & Uncle Vincent will figure something out.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Heh. Yeah. I do. I sure as shit wouldn't wanna be on Aunt Poppy's bad side. Especially not now. She's all fucking pregnant and maternal.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): God, I almost fucking hope that Aunt Poppy doesn't find anything or your parents are in serious fucking trouble.
An hour or so later, outside of Nathaniel & Aiden's apartment:
Nathaniel: Oh Jesus... I am so fucking glad to be home. (to Marlena) Yeah. Thank fucking god. Thanks again, Mars. I'm glad you were there with me.
Marlena (to Nathaniel): You're welcome! I'll see you later.
Nathaniel (to Marlena): Later, Slim! Go make River's day. :-P
A few minutes later, at Nathaniel & Aiden's apartment:
Aiden (to Nathaniel): Nate! You're home!
Nathaniel (to Aiden): Aiden? I thought you'd be at work. God, am I glad to see you.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): I got off early today. We finished the section we were working on & Ms. Fawkes had a meeting. She didn't want to start a new project & have to take off in the beginning of it in case I had any questions... I'm really glad to see you too. I take it the trip wasn't successful?
Nathaniel (to Aiden): ... No. They-- they didn't wanna listen to me. I'm sorry.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): Come here, handsome... I appreciate you trying.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): I had to. I just... I had to try. Hey, I'm alright, OK? I mean, I feel kinda like I'm either gonna burst into tears, or sleep for a week, but I'm alright. It'll be OK.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): I know it will. Why don't you curl up on the couch & throw in a movie? I'll make you a cup of tea.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): Heh. I know YOU know, I just need to keep reminding myself. That sounds amazing right now. I missed you SO much.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): Well, other than the visit with your folks, how did the rest of the trip go?
Nathaniel (to Aiden): It was alright. We stopped at this god awful tourist trap called South of the Border. That was pretty funny.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): How was that?
Nathaniel (to Aiden): I, um, I ran into Tim's mom. It was surreal. She gave me a hug and said she was glad I was OK. I thought... I guess I expected she'd be pissed at me.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): Why would she be upset with you, Nate? You didn't do anything wrong.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): I know. But if it wasn't for me, he wouldn't have been here, and he wouldn't have... I mean, I know I didn't DO anything, but I still feel kinda responsible, you know?
Aiden (to Nathaniel): You're not responsible. You don't know what or who Tim was involved with. You can't keep blaming yourself for his death. Clearly, his parents don't blame you.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): ... I know.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): Come here... Let's not think about this stuff right now. Here's your tea.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): That sounds way fucking better. I'd rather just curl up with you than just about anything else right now. I slept like shit. Thanks.
Aiden (to Nathaniel): You're welcome. I'm glad you're home.
Nathaniel (to Aiden): Me too.
Several hours later, at Mouse & Eep's house, West Piedmont:
Mouse (to Gabriel): Gabriel Estevez, what on earth are you doing in there!?!
Gabriel (to Mouse): Uhhhh.... Nothing. Wait, brushing my teeth? I wasn't there! Marlena did it!
Mouse (to Gabriel): Very funny. Your sister doesn't live here anymore... Why is there toothpaste on the wall?
Gabriel (to Mouse): What toothpaste? Oh.. THAT toothpaste. Ummmm.... the wall was dirty? I was cleaning??
Mouse (to Gabriel): Sweetie, did someone give you sugar, today?
Gabriel (to Mouse): ... Is there sugar in cookies? Because, if so, then YES OMG. BEST COOKIES EVER.
Mouse (to Gabriel): I give up... (to Eep) Talk to your son. He hurts my brain.
Eep (to Mouse): Don't look at me. I'm still not convinced he's not a gremlin. (to Gabriel) Are you SURE you don't have a tail or something?
Mouse (to Eep): Well, I did get him from a strange old Chinese man.
Gabriel (to Eep): I HAD TAIL?! WHY DON'T I HAVE IT NOW?? Darnit... I coulda been a monkey.
Eep (to Mouse): What have I told you about shopping in those junk shops. Now we can't get him wet. (to Gabriel) Your sister is the monkey. You're the gremlin.
Gabriel (to Eep): ... I don't know what that is dad. Is it like a dog? Will it make you forget about my fire truck in the fridge?
Eep (to Gabriel): Why WAS your fire truck in the fridge?
Gabriel (to Eep): Ummm.. my fire truck WASN'T in the fridge. Because it got hot. Putting out the fire. You don't remember that... Gremli-dog powers.
Eep (to Gabriel): Yeah. For some reason I still remember that. Keep your toys out of the fridge, OK?
Gabriel (to Eep): ... FINE. Worst. Superpowers. EVER.
Mouse (to Gabriel): Gabe sweetie, do you want a bedtime story? If so, it's time to get into your pjs. Dinosaurs or Robots?
Gabriel (to Mouse): Yes. Dinosaurs. I'm not tired... but I GUESS a story is good. For now.
Mouse (to Gabriel): You're very kind & gracious, my lovely son.
Gabriel (to Mouse): I think you're pretty great-tous too, Mom.
A few minutes later:
Eep (to Marlena): Hey, Monkey. You're back in town, darkening our doorstep, huh?
Marlena (to Eep): Yeah... after seeing Nate's family it made me a little homesick for you guys. I'm really glad you are you, you know?
Eep (to Marlena): Oh... Uh, well, I'm glad to hear it. We're glad to be us too. It was that good, huh?
Marlena (to Eep): Yeah. His mom kept trying to insist that I was his girlfriend, his brother is a fucking robust mongoloid & his dad is a jerk. I'm honestly fucking surprised Nate came out as sane as he did, which is saying something considering how fucked up he was when he showed up on Aunt Poppy & Uncle Vincent's doorstep... Is it okay if I crash here tonight?
Eep (to Marlena): Get the fuck out. You know you're always welcome here, Monkey. Come on. Your mom should have put Gabe down by now. Or shot him. One or the other.
Marlena (to Eep): Thanks, dad. Is Goo being a hyper spazz again? I swear that kid could power a small fucking city.
Eep (to Marlena): Spazz doesn't even begin to cover it. He was applying toothpaste to the fucking wall, for reasons we still don't understand.
Marlena (to Eep): Did you check under the toothpaste? Last week, I caught him watching some show that talked about using it to fill in nail holes.
Eep (to Marlena): Shit. I'll do a search in his room for the hammer tomorrow. And don't worry too much about Nate. If he's anything like your uncle, he's gonna be fine. If for no other reason, than to spite his fucking father. And he apparently inherited your uncle's fucking unreal good luck.
Marlena (to Eep): Heh. I know. I just worry about the jackass. Oh, and I saw the graffiti you wrote at South of the Border... Was that on your first trip there with mom or a different time? And, don't try to deny it was you, I recognized your handwriting.
Eep (to Marlena): Heh. Yeah... It might have been me. Which piece of graffiti was it? What did it say?
Marlena (to Eep): It looked like a doodle of a mouse & something on a roller coaster. with the word forever written under it... Wait. There were others? Damn. I should have kept looking.
Eep (to Marlena): Heh. It was a mouse and a monkey. I drew that the first time you, your mom and I went there. You were probably about three. Maybe four. Every time your mom and I have been there, we've done some little bit of graffiti. Heh. I'm shocked some of them are still there.
Marlena (to Eep): Heh. You're such a sap, dad... A lovable, surly sap. What did you draw the first time you guys went there?
Eep (to Marlena): Sappy? Oh, fuck off. I'm so sorry I happen to love the shit out of my wife and kids. The first time we were there, I think I drew your mom and I wearing sombreros, and... Something else. I can't quite remember.
Marlena (to Eep): Heh. I bet.
Eep (to Marlena): Well, you'll just have to go back and see if you can fucking find it, won't you?
Mouse (to Marlena): Don't give your father such a hard time & come give me a hug.
Marlena (to Eep): Well, maybe I will. (to Mouse) Heh. Hi mom, I missed you.
Mouse (to Marlena): I missed you, too. I put fresh sheets on your bed, so you're welcome to crash here. (to Eep) And, the monster is asleep.
Marlena (to Mouse & Eep): Thank you.
Eep (to Mouse): Thank fucking God. Apparently some of our South of the Border graffiti is still up and confusing a new generation.
Mouse (to Eep): It is? I was hoping it would. (to Marlena) You didn't find the one by the water tower, did you? (to Eep) Maybe, we should take a trip down there just the two of us & see for ourselves?
Eep (to Mouse): Heh. She's not scandalized enough to have found the one by the water tower.
Marlena (to Eep & Mouse): Oh damn, I think I need to go to bed. You're both trying to fuck with me.
Eep (to Marlena): Would we ever do something like that? Night, Monkey.
Mouse (to Marlena): Heehee, sleep sweet, Mars.
Marlena (to Eep & Mouse): Good night... Just stop talking until I close my door. Gah, I'm going to need brain bleach.
Eep (to Marlena): YOUR MOM IS A SEXY WOMAN!
Marlena (to Eep): Lalala, I can't fucking hear you!
Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, I'm glad you think so. You're not so bad yourself for an old guy. :-p
Eep (to Mouse): I don't think. I know. How many kids have you had at Drac's and Renfield's fucking swoon over you? 30? 50?
Mouse (to Eep): Heh... You're sexy when you exaggerate my appeal. :-p
Eep (to Mouse): Exaggeration my fucking ass. Heh. How do people without kids entertain themselves? Who do they torment? Everyone else would press charges.
Mouse (to Eep): I think they have pets. But, seriously, let's you & me go somewhere. We can dump Gabe with Vincent & Poppy and run off.
Eep (to Mouse): I'm all for running off. I've got vacation time I can use. When can you get away?
Mouse (to Eep): Hmmm, I'd like to say tomorrow but we've got a big order for the Spring Formal at Lovelace. How about next weekend?
Eep (to Mouse): I can make next weekend work.
Mouse (to Eep): Good. Where do you want to go on our running away mini-extravaganza?
Eep (to Mouse): Besides South of the Border? I'm not sure... It's a bit too chilly for the beach? Want to head to the mountains?
Mouse (to Eep): Oh, that would be perfect. I'll call & see if we can get reservations at that place we like. I love you, Felix.
Eep (to Mouse): I love you too, Killer. I agree with Mars. I'm glad you bunch of crazy asses are my family. Ready to head to bed?
Mouse (to Eep): Well, when you say things like that, how can I resist?
