Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 41

Mouse (to Vincent): Hey little brother, I need a favor...

Vincent (to Mouse): Of course, sweet sister. What do you need?

Mouse (to Vincent): How quickly do you think you & I could remodel my bathroom? Do you think we could get it done while Eep is at work?

Vincent (to Mouse): Mmmm. Depends on what you want to do. Between the two of us, we could get it mostly done if not finished. Why the sudden desire for home improvement? And why are we doing it while Mr. Giggles is at work?

Mouse (to Vincent): Because, he was bitching about the size of the bathtub & I thought it would be a nice surprise. Plus, it's a terrible tub. I should have done it years ago, but I wasn't properly motivated, I guess. :-)

Vincent (to Mouse): I've been telling you that for years! All of a sudden your all-arms-and-legs Mister says it and you're chomping at the bit. :-P And we are painting in there while we're at it. That wallpaper has to GO. I'll be over in a few.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh... shit. Do you want to replace the porch swing while we're at it?

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. One major overhaul at a time, hun.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh god, what have I wrought? I'm going to need more coffee for this, I can already tell.

Vincent (to Mouse): You SO are, which is why I'm bringing more with me. Quick question, do you want a claw-foot tub? I can get you a good deal on one from Mr. Butler, but it will mean WAY more remodeling.

Mouse (to Vincent): Yes, I think that would be perfect in here. I think it may have had one at one time, but someone modernized it in the 70's. Well, it WILL go with my "Victorian/early halloween" decor, so much better than what I've got.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. That it will. OK. Let me make a few calls, and I'll be there soon.

Mouse (to Vincent): Ok, thanks, little brother.

An hour or so later:

Vincent (to Mouse): Knock, knock! I come bearing a truck, a handcart, a tub, and coffee. Which do you want first? :-P

Mouse (to Vincent): Coffee first, please. Thank you for coming to help. I hope I didn't tear you away from anything important.

Vincent (to Mouse): It's fine, sweetie. Hee hee. You know I love remodelng. I wasn't really doing anything with myself today.

Mouse (to Vincent): That's good. I'll go throw on some work clothes & we can get started.

Vincent (to Mouse): Sounds good. I'm going to go ahead and get started. Besides the tub & that Godawful wallpaper, are we changing anything else?

Mouse (to Vincent): I don't think so, unless you have something in mind.

Vincent (to Mouse): Mmm. I might at that. Let me see how much work we have ahead of us first. :-P

Mouse (to Vincent): Why am I not surprised that you have some ideas? ... Oh, I had a couple things I wanted to tell you that you might like. First off, I spoke to the reporter, yesterday. So I think the article should be out in the next week or two.

Vincent (to Mouse): I *was* wondering about that.

Mouse (to Vincent): So, prepare yourself for the possible onslaught... Maybe, you could go out of town for a little while?

Vincent (to Mouse): Maybe... I'll see how it goes. It's still possible that there won't be any reaction at all.

Mouse (to Vincent): I know, but at least, if you're not here, then they can't bother you...

Vincent (to Mouse): It's not a bad idea, sweetie, but I kind of feel like I've been running away from this for too long already.

Mouse (to Vincent): No, no. You're absolutely right... Anyway, my other news is that the apartment above Wanda & Robert is coming available the end of next month. So, I was thinking that since you were trying to save money, you could move in there & then you wouldn't need a roommate.

Vincent (to Mouse): Wait. Since when do you want me living in the same building with you?

Mouse (to Vincent): Sweetie, why wouldn't I want you living in the same building as me? You're the one that wanted to move out in the first place. I was just throwing it out there as an option for you. In case, you didn't want to have to share an apartment. And, I like having folks I care about around me... I may have become a social creature when I wasn't looking.

Vincent (to Mouse): Good heavens! So you have. Who are you strange pod person and what have you done with my sister? Though, I do appreciate the offer, I don't think it would be fair to leave Poppy in the lurch like that. And I don't mind having a roommate so much. It's nice to have another soul in the home sometimes.

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, I know what you mean. Well, then that's settled... so, when are you going to move into the new place with Poppy?

Vincent (to Mouse): Shortly. She and Percy are collecting some of the last of her things from the other side this weekend, I believe. Then it's time for me to consolidate and move. My landlord has been a peach about the whole thing. I think it's because he's going to significantly raise the rent of the next poor souls that move in after I'm gone.

Mouse (to Vincent): Awww, my baby brother is all grown up... moving in with a girl & everything. :-P ... OW! You didn't have to pinch me.

Vincent (to Mouse): Well, don't act like a brat, and I won't treat you like one. Behave, or I'll paint your bathroom road cone orange!

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, sorry. I couldn't help myself, I like teasing you... Please, don't paint my bathroom orange.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. Well, as a resounded teaser myself, I certainly can't fault you. :-P

A couple hours later:

Vincent (to Mouse): OK, I've got the tile finished behind where your old tub used to be. You're right, by the by. From the look of the plumbing there was a clawfoot tub here before.

Mouse (to Vincent): Well, I figured it since the house wasn't always apartments & I think this may have been one of the original bathrooms. So, what's the next step, oh great & powerful renovator of bathrooms?

Vincent (to Mouse): The part we've been dreading. Moving the tub into the bathroom and hooking it up. At least all the fixtures are in the right places. Ooo, this isn't gonna be fun.

Mouse (to Vincent): We can do this... I think.

Vincent (to Mouse): We can totes do this. We've handled worse.

Mouse (to Vincent): Gah! Where's a robot when you need one?

Poppy (to Vincent & Mouse): ... Wow. I have to say that this is both the silliest & sexiest thing I've ever seen.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Don't let us keep you from helping, hun. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent & Mouse): I brought pizza & beer for you guys... let me go put it in the kitchen & then I'll help. (to Vincent) If I had known this is what you meant in your message about helping Mouse with her bathroom, I would have asked Percy to come over and do it.

Mouse (to Poppy): Oh god, yes please... this thing weighs a ton.

Vincent (to Poppy): You, madam, are wonderful. Once we get the tub into the bathroom, we're golden. That, of course, is the trick.

Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, where do you want me?

Vincent (to Poppy): If you could take up the side with Mouse, I'd be much obliged.

Poppy (to Vincent): Will do!

Mouse (to Poppy): Heehee, the kerchief around your head is a nice touch...

Poppy (to Mouse): Thanks, I thought it went well with my ensemble... now, focus on the task at hand, mousey mouse.

Thirty minutes later:

Vincent (to Poppy & Mouse): Oh, good God. That does it, ladies. I think this thing weighed more than all three of us combined.

Poppy (to Vincent & Mouse): Thank goodness. Beer?

Mouse (to Poppy): That would be great! Thanks.

Vincent (to Poppy): Thanks, hun. I'm just going to get this hooked up, and we can call it a day.

Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): I'm going to go take a load to the dumpster. I'll be back in a minute.

Vincent (to Mouse): Okie dokie, sweetie. I'll be right here. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, has anyone ever told you how sexy you look when you're being a handyman?

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee hee? Oh? I wasn't aware you like your men sloppy, sweaty and wearing horrible clothes, hun.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I didn't know it either, honey... and on that note, I'm going to head back home before I get myself in trouble. :-)

Vincent (to Poppy): Haha! Yes. I'm sure I'm just irresistible right now. I'll see you soon, hun. Thank you for the help and for the supplies.

Mouse (to Poppy): Going already?

Poppy (to Mouse): Yes, I'm afraid if I stay Vincent will make me do more work, honey. :-P

Mouse (to Poppy): Heehee, well thanks for helping out.

Poppy (to Vincent & Mouse): See you two later!

Mouse (to Vincent): Well, that was awfully nice of Poppy...

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. It was! She can be way more considerate than she lets on.

Mouse (to Vincent): I keep forgetting that this is original Poppy... and she is much nicer than Percy, I can see why you like her.

Vincent (to Mouse): Mmm. We actually get along quite well. I just wish she trusted me more.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh. Hi there, mister man... there's pizza on the table & beer in the fridge.

Eep (to Mouse & Vincent): Uh... Hey. What the fuck are you two doing?

Mouse (to Eep): Ummm, remodeling the bathroom... Surprise!

Vincent (to Eep): What she said.

Eep (to Mouse): Uhhhh... Yeah. So I see. Um, you know I was just kidding about the tub, right?

Mouse (to Eep): Oh... Should I go put the old one back in? :-P

Vincent (to Eep): Hush you! I've been trying to get her to do something with this bathroom since I was 16. Toddle off to the kitchen and get yourself some food and beer and let me work.

Mouse (to Eep): It's true, he's been trying to get me to do this for years.

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Uh... OK then. Um, do you guys need any help?

Vincent (to Eep): No. No. No. No. And in case you didn't get the hint the first time... NO.

Mouse (to Eep): Ummm, not re... Wait. Actually, you want to take over for me?

Eep (to Mouse): Uhhh... Sure. Um. What are you doing?

Mouse (to Eep): I've been removing the wallpaper with this steamer & scrapper. My arms are getting tired. (to Vincent) Is that acceptable to you? Is it okay if he helps me with the wallpaper removal, bossy ass?

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Uh, yeah. Sure. Lemme change my shirt first.

Vincent (to Mouse): I suppose so. But only if he does it shirtless. :-P

Eep (to Vincent): Fuck no!

Mouse (to Vincent & Eep): Well, it would make it easier to get clean afterwards. :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Still fuck no.

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee. Okay, okay... No need to glare at me. I was only kidding. (to Eep & Vincent) I'll take another batch of stuff to the dumpster... Feel free to talk about me while I'm gone. :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Yeah. (to Vincent) Do you know what you're doing over there?

Vincent (to Eep): Of course! I redid my own bathroom with no problems. Mouse and I have done a lot of the renovations in this place ourselves.

Eep (to Vincent): Oh. Well, that's unexpected.

Vincent (to Eep): What? I'm VERY handy. :-P

Eep (to Vincent): I am SO ignoring that.

Mouse (to Vincent & Eep): Oh good, you're both still alive...

Eep (to Mouse): Your brother is damn lucky he's alive.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. It's not my fault your beau is so damn sensitive.

Mouse (to Vincent & Eep): You know, I'm very tempted to leave you two in here alone, but I don't want my bathroom to turn into the ThunderDome.

Vincent (to Mouse): Oooo. I want to be Tina Turner!

Mouse (to Vincent): If you don't watch it, you're going to be Master & I'll make Ripper be Blaster. :-P

Vincent (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! Oh my GOD! We should totes do that at the bar one night. How *amazing* would that be?

Mouse (to Vincent): I think I now completely regret my Mad Max reference. And, Eep looks like he's trying not to laugh...

Vincent (to Mouse): We could dress Eep up like Max, you know.

Mouse (to Vincent): Well, I'm all for that...

Eep (to Mouse & Vincent): You two are fucking ridiculous, you know that?

Mouse (to Eep): Yes, probably... But, that's why you love us. Well, me anyway... I don't know why you put up with him. :-P

Vincent (to Eep & Mouse): Because I'm adorable. Who wouldn't love me? I mean, aside from people with no taste, that is.

Mouse (to Vincent & Eep): Heehee, I give up...

Eep (to Mouse & Vincent): Yeah. There's nothing I can say to that.

An hour or so later:

Vincent (to Mouse & Eep): I think that's the last of the wallpaper.

Mouse (to Vincent & Eep): Hurrah!

Vincent (to Mouse): Thank GOD! May we never see the like of that paper again.

Mouse (to Vincent): Thank you, little brother, for coming over and helping me! I know how much you have hated this bathroom. (to Eep) And, thank you for helping, too... I was hoping to have it mostly done before you got home, but it was a bigger job than I expected.

Vincent (to Mouse): Well, it WAS repellent. I hope you two enjoy it. Sister dearest, I'll help you paint if you'd like once you pick a color.

Eep (to Mouse): It's fine. I don't mind helping. And, uh, thanks. This was a nice surprise.

Mouse (to Vincent): I'll probably think about it for a day or so & then paint on Wednesday. (to Eep) Hmmm, maybe, I should make you pick out the paint...

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. Well, give me a call if you want help. And remember that the tile has to set for at least 24 hours. See you two crazy kids later.

Mouse (to Vincent): Bye and thanks again! (to Eep) So, how was your day at work?

Eep (to Mouse): It was, uh... It was pretty good, actually. I actually really like working at the bookstore. It's, um, unexpected.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, that's really good to hear. I'm glad you like it. Do you want a beer? I was going to grab myself one.

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. That sounds awesome. So... a new bathroom, huh?

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, I think it'll look really nice when it's done... plus, I love claw footed bathtubs. They're roomy.

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Oh! Roomy. Right...

Mouse (to Eep): Here's your beer... Curl up & watch a movie with me?

Eep (to Mouse): Well, you drive a hard bargain, but I suppose I could be persuaded. No Mad Max movies, though.

Mouse (to Eep): Oh, worried that I'm going to fantasize about you being dressed like him? :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! More like I'm creeped out by the idea of Vincent in Tina Turner's wig. But, hey. I've GOT leather pants, you know. Heh. Kidding! I'm kidding!

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, tease. You got me all excited for no reason... how about you pick the movie?

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Uh, heh. Sure.

Thirty minutes later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Hi honey, did you get Mouse's tub all situated?

Vincent (to Poppy): I did. She still needs to paint, now that we've gotten rid of that horrid wallpaper.

Poppy (to Vincent): That is good news... that wallpaper was atrocious.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh my GOODNESS, I know, right? Thank you so much for your help today, hun. The food and beer was much appreciated.

Poppy (to Vincent): It was the least I could do, honey...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Actually, you could have done far less if you had the mind to, hun. I appreciate it all the same. Now, I really think I should take a shower. I'm a horror.

Poppy (to Vincent): Would you like me to fix you a drink while you're in the shower, honey?

Vincent (to Poppy): That would be fabulous, hun! Thank you once again.

Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey. I'm in such a good mood today, that I can't help being nice...

Vincent (to Poppy): Did everything go well with Percy, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): It did. So, much better than I expected... I think he's finally coming to terms with being Percy & we came to a truce.

Vincent (to Poppy): That's exceptionally good news. I'm really glad to hear it. I...Oof! Oh heavens. I need a shower STAT. I'll see you in a few.

Twenty minutes later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Feel better, honey? Here's your drink.

Vincent (to Poppy): Indefinitely. Thank you again.

Poppy (to Vincent): So, do you want to know what Percy said to me?

Vincent (to Poppy): Wow. I'd say so. Heh. I have to admit to being curious, hun.

Poppy (to Vincent): I mean, he said a lot of things, but one of the things that made me in a good mood... boy, I need to lighten up on the gin. Well, he said that he needed to pave his own way & not just be Poppy-squared. And, that despite his feelings of jealousy towards me... I had fabulous taste, he liked having his own ship & he thought that you & I were better suited than the two of you were, so he agreed on a truce...I mean, I let him have the ship in exchange for some of my possessions. But, everything was technically mine, so I didn't have to, but I thought he'd appreciate it & clearly he did. And clearly, I need some water, as I'm a bit babbly.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Oh my. Well, I'm glad you and Percy have achieved some level of peace, hun. So... he thinks we're better matched than RoboPoppy and I, does he?

Poppy (to Vincent): That's what he said, though I didn't have the heart to tell him that we're not dating, as I was worried that would change his mind about the whole truce thing.

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, we wouldn't want to jeopardize that. I've got more than enough automatons that hate me. Hee hee hee. Oh good heavens. How much gin DID you put in these drinks?

Poppy (to Vincent): I didn't think I put that much extra in. The ginger beer was so potent that I couldn't taste any of the gin, so I added a little more. I'll grab another soda to water it down, if you like...

Vincent (to Poppy): Mmm. That might be for the best. I probably should have grabbed more to eat. And I REALLY should start packing soon.

Poppy (to Vincent): There's leftovers from last night in the fridge, honey...

Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo! Thanks, hun. Leftovers it is!

Poppy (to Vincent): I think I'm going to curl up & read for a bit, unless you have something else in mind, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): I don't know. You were the one who was sure she couldn't be trusted around me earlier. Hee hee. Though, maybe I've lost all my allure now that I'm clean. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Quick, go fix something, so we can find out, honey. :-P

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 40

Professor Maladori: I do so enjoy it when a well-formed plan coalesces.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Has Carver returned to your laboratory? I seem to have misplaced him... it's a bit unsettling.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): So sorry, Ms Potter, but I've not seen hide nor blonde hair of the child since he left my laboratory. I did put an electric shock device beneath the skin on the back of his neck past time he was here. He was so infuriatingly *tactile* with my experiments, I thought it might be handy to have a disciplinary device.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Well, I do admire your ingenuity... However, I don't see how that helps me in this present situation.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): I can try to can pick up its power signature and track down your pet that way.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Aaah, that would be quite useful. Please, let me know what you discover. I'm sending out some henchmen to check out the Fancy, that was the last place I had sent him. They can visit with Captain Every and find out what he knows.

Professor Maladori: How odd. I find myself *looking* for a missing child. I find it quite the humorous reversal. Ha. Ha. Ha. (to Hiiri) If you glean any information that would allow me to narrow my search perimeters, do pass it along.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): I shall Professor. And, if you find him for me, you shall be rewarded well.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): Very good,Ms Potter. You know I can be as reliable a person as you pay me to be.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Yes, yes. I know that quite well.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): I'm sorry to report, Ms Potter, where ever your young ward has scampered off to, it is out of the range of my scanners.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Hmmm, that can only mean one thing... and, certainly would explain a bit.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): Let me know if I can be of any addition service. If you have no further need of me, I do have a poodle to stuff with sawdust. Or, possibly gunpowder and packing. I haven't decided quite which would be more amusing yet.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): I think the latter would be the more amusing of the two choices.

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): Indubitably. I knew there was a reason I so enjoyed the jobs for which you hire me, Ms Potter. Ta.

Hiiri (to Professor Maldori): Goodbye, Professor, until next time.

Ripper: Oh my... this is a bit of a sticky wicket.

Eep (to Ripper): Oh. Hey, Ripper. Coffee time for you too, huh?

Ripper (to Eep): Yes, I uh, didn't get much sleep last night and I have some papers to grade.

Eep (to Ripper): Well, that blows ass. At least it's only Saturday, so you've got whole other day to finish them up. Heh. And if you don't get them done then, you could always pull the old "teacher work day" routine and cancel class.

Ripper (to Eep): Heh. That's what I'm hoping. What brings you out & about?

Eep (to Ripper): I'm making myself scarce for a few hours. Mouse is talking to the reporter this afternoon, so, you know.

Ripper (to Eep): I can see why you'd want to run away. Do you think it's going to do any good?

Eep (to Ripper): Yeah. Moral support is great and all, but the less I'm connected with it, probably the better. Fucked if I know what it'll do. From what I've read about that church, I'm kinda expecting it's gonna get nasty.

Ripper (to Eep): I certainly hope it helps Vincent to deal with his family shit... I just worry that it might get ugly.

Eep (to Ripper): Heh. Hence the reason I'm hiding here. But, honestly? I don't think it's gonna resolve jack shit.

Ripper (to Eep): Well no, I don't expect his family to suddenly apologize or anything. From the little he's told me, they don't sound the type. But, maybe he'll be able to let it go, finally. I don't know, this is uncharted territory for me. I actually like my parents.

Eep (to Ripper): Ha ha ha! Yeah, that makes you the odd man out in this group, doesn't it? Heh. For what it's worth, I liked my mom.

Ripper (to Eep): Heh. I'm discovering that more & more... especially, after my recent "adventure" with Percy & Vincent. I have come to the conclusion that, I'm quite sorry to admit, but I think I'm a lover not a fighter. And, that I should just stick to writing.

Eep (to Ripper): Heh. Welcome to the club. I'd offer you a one of our "people almost a foot shorter than me can kick my ass" t-shirts, but no one ever wanted to wear them. What happened with Percy and Vincent. Oh... Wait. Is this something I don't wanna know?

Ripper (to Eep): Heh. It probably is... let's just say that Vincent got worked up about Poppy being gone to the other side & I got dragged into it.

Eep (to Ripper): Oh! Right! Mouse told me about that. She said you guys ran into that creepy little kid Hiiri tows around with her. Jesus.

Ripper (to Eep): Yeah. He is incredibly creepy... but they took care of him. I just stood there like an idiot.

Eep (to Ripper): Heh. Yeah. Don't feel too bad. When Vincent and I tried to get Mouse from Mr. Smythe, I was pretty much told to keep the fuck out of the way.

Ripper (to Eep): Heh. I think Vincent may have thought that I had more experience of the adventure variety. I mean, I've been around it, but yeah I was usually told to stay out of the way, too.

Eep (to Ripper): Um, how come you just stay home? I mean, like I should talk...

Ripper (to Eep): Oh no, I don't just stay home... I like to go to the other side, it's full of all sorts of fantastic things. But, I'm not really going out looking for trouble when I'm over there.

Eep (to Ripper): Yeah. According to Vincent, he doesn't either. I'm still not sure if I believe him about that or not. Hey, um, I'm not bugging you, am I? I mean, I've got a book I can read if you need to get going or grade papers or something.

Ripper (to Eep): Yeah, I should probably get going, I've probably procrastinated long enough. I'll see you tonight at the club.

Eep (to Ripper): Later!

An hour or so later:

Poppy (to Eep): Well, look who it is! Fancy running into you here, honey.

Eep (to Poppy): Oh. Hey, Poppy.

Poppy (to Eep): What has happened to make you hide out in a coffeehouse on this fine day?

Eep (to Poppy): Nothing. Mouse is talking to the reporter, so I'm staying out of the way.

Poppy (to Eep): Oh... well then, I'll just go grab my coffee and leave you to your book. Are you okay, honey? A bit nervous about the interview?

Eep (to Poppy): Oh, uh... I guess a little bit. I mean, I'm sure it'll be fine. It will be fine no matter what happens, but... Well, you know. I don't want it to get nasty.

Poppy (to Eep): Well, after everything I found out, honey, I have a feeling the church is going to want to deal with it as quietly as possible. It's going to be terrible publicity for them, not to mention the sheer embarrassment.

Eep (to Poppy): Oh yeah? Like what?

Poppy (to Eep): Well, there's the fact that Pastor Nate really enjoys pornography of the, well, homosexual variety. And, I'm fairly certain that he's as queer as a three dollar bill... So, you know... How would it look to have someone like that running their 'pray out the gay' camps.

Eep (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Well, that doesn't fucking surprise me. Like at all.

Poppy (to Eep): Heehee, does that make you feel any better?

Eep (to Poppy): Heh. Yeah. A bit.

Poppy (to Eep): Well, glad to be of service. I'll see you later.

Eep (to Poppy): Later!

Mouse (to Eep): Hey man o' mine, it's safe to come back to the house, if you want.

Eep (to Mouse): Heading back now. How'd the interview go?

Mouse (to Eep): It went fine... I think I need a really long, hot bath & big drink.

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Well I can help you with at least one of those things.

Mouse (to Eep): You are my favorite boyfriend!

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Oh good. I'd hate for one of those other guys to be your number one.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, you do have stiff competition. :-P heehee, how was your day?

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Not too bad. I ended up not getting much of my book read. First I ran into Ripper and then Poppy.

Mouse (to Eep): heehee, I'm surprised you didn't run into Vincent, too...

Eep (to Mouse): Swiftly followed by Leon, Delia, Jules, and then Sasha for good measure. Heh. Thank God for small favors, I suppose.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, stretch out on the couch, read your book & I'll go enjoy a soak in the tub. I'd invite you to come with me, but after last time, I'm a little wary.

Eep (to Mouse): Hey! That wasn't entirely my fault. Cut me some slack. I'm over six feet and your tub is fucking TINY. Besides, it wasn't like I didn't get as good as I got. I was the one who ended up with a bloody nose, after all.

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, so what you're saying is that if I take a shower you'll join me? And, that maybe I should remodel the bathroom with a bigger tub? :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. I think a shower might be safe.

Mouse (to Eep): Should one of us call little brother first to make sure he isn't on his way over? :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! I'll let you handle that one.

Mouse (to Eep): Come on, quit stalling.

Eep (to Mouse): Yeesh! Alright. Alright. Lead the way, bossy.

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 39

Hiiri: Where on earth has my little brother gotten to? This is very upsetting.

Poppy (to Vincent): Good morning, honey. I have made an apology breakfast for you... Would you like to eat in silence or should I commence with the apologies posthaste?

Vincent (to Poppy): You wouldn't be trying to catch me first thing in the morning before I've had a chance to build up steam, now would you, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, uh... No, that's not what's going on, at all, honey... Yes, that's totally what's going on. Is it working?

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, I'm not currently shouting, so I'd say it's working better than I'd care to admit. If the truth be known, hun, I am trying very hard not to be upset. After all, this is exactly what I was doing to my sister.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I was on my way to come home when CLANNG intercepted me. And, I'm sorry that I took your car, honey, without asking. You have every right to be mad at me. So, go ahead and let me have it.

Vincent (to Poppy): I'm not mad at you for taking my car, hun. ... well, OK, yes I am. But, I'm not ONLY mad at you for taking the car. If you really didn't want me coming with you, which is obvious, all you had to do was ask. I would have given you the keys.

Poppy (to Vincent): Really, honey? You've been kind of insistent about coming with me in the past… To be honest, you get kind of overly male & protective when you think I might get in trouble. It's sweet & all, but I've been doing this awhile & can take care of myself.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh good. Good to know that you stole my car keys to teach me a lesson about gender equality. And yes, I am no doubt more overprotective than I need to be right now, but in case you didn't notice... I treat Eep, Ripper and my sister the same way. I'm still paranoid over the people I care about getting hurt. So, yes. I am SORRY for being an overprotective ass. But for the record, I wouldn't have forced my company on you.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well then, I'm sorry for assuming you were going to be difficult. I didn't want you to get hurt, either... I know Markus wouldn't hurt me intentionally, but you're a stranger & he might not feel so inclined to niceties with you. Plus, there was the other family stuff to deal with, like, seeing Bernard & Molly. I really don't have the energy to explain or argue with you, honey. I'm sorry that you're angry with me & you have every right to be. But, I thought I was doing what was best...

Vincent (to Poppy): I didn't mean to lose my temper. I don't want to argue with you either, hun. Especially not first thing in the day. And to be fair to you, part of the reason I'm so annoyed is because this is EXACTLY the same thing I did when I went to get Alistair off Hiiri's ship. No wonder my sister was so livid. It's not much fun to be smacked in the face by your own bad behavior, you know.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well on the plus side, Markus is back in Newgate, Carver has more than likely been picked up by CLANNG, I have a healthy, brand new baby niece, and not to mention, that Bernard's outlook is promising according to the doctors.

Vincent (to Poppy): That's all exceptionally good news, hun. I'm glad to hear it.

Poppy (to Vincent): I do really appreciate you coming to find me, honey...You could have left me to rot for a little while to teach me a lesson. But, you didn't, so thank you.

Vincent (to Poppy): Of course I wouldn't have done that! Honestly, the thought didn't even cross my mind. With Carver running around, I was too worried about you to be that petty. Not that I needed to worry. In the end, we were the ones who got to deal with him. God, he's a horrible little thing.

Poppy (to Vincent): You're telling me, honey... I'm trying not to think about the fact that Carver has permission to "play" with me. Or what Hiiri is going to do once she realizes he's missing... It might get ugly.

Vincent (to Poppy): I hate to say it, but I think Hiiri sent him after you to find out why you're not an automaton, hun. He seemed very keen on Percy when they met. So much so, that I was able to get behind him without his notice.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh well, that's a bit unsettling.

Vincent (to Poppy): Mmm. More than a little bit. Let's hope she doesn't get that portal opening device operating any time soon.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I know that Emmett & the wizard have a plan for dealing with Hiiri, but it's pretty ruthless. I think they're hoping to come up with something else before they use it. But, things are lining up to make it seem like it might be the best solution... possibly, a final solution.

Vincent (to Poppy): Wow. I... Really? I don't suppose I should be surprised. She's too bloody dangerous to let run around... I know it's ridiculous, but I have a hard time contemplating killing someone with my sister's face. Even if she would be likely to skin me alive given the chance.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, no one expects you to do it, honey, just leave it to Emmett & the wizard to deal with it...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, it's a good thing. I'd be *terrible* at it. Speaking of my sister, I check in with her. (to Mouse) How's my favorite sister today?

Mouse (to Vincent): Awww, that's sweet... I'd say I'm your only sister, but I know that's not true. :-P So, everything went okay on the other side?

Vincent (to Mouse): I said you were my FAVORITE sister, and that is the truth. The trip went well enough, I suppose. We ran into Carver.

Mouse (to Vincent): Is everyone okay? Were you able to find Poppy?

Vincent (to Mouse): Thankfully, we're all fine! We were able to subdue him, and managed to bring Poppy home safe and sound. One of her brothers didn't want to let her leave. He had heard rumors that Hiiri had given Carver permission to "play" with her.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh god, that sounds a bit terrifying, but I'm glad you found her. And, that you all got home safe & sound... I hope you weren't too hard on her. I know what it's like to be worried about your family.

Vincent (to Mouse): I tried not to be. Which brings me nicely to point number 2, actually. I'm so sorry for being such a headstrong little twat.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh, wow, I'm speechless...

Vincent (to Mouse): Hardy har har. I AM capable of admitting I made a mistake and apologizing, you know. :-P

Several hours later:

Ripper (to Vincent): I seem to have a rodent infestation in the booth...

Vincent (to Ripper): Hee hee. So you do. I was wondering why you were playing some of these mash-ups, Professor. (to Mouse) Is that a little Mouse I spy? In the mood to spin, I see. :-P

Ripper (to Vincent): I can't complain too much, the dancefloor is packed.

Mouse (to Vincent): Um, maybe...

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. Well, it doesn't look like you're getting any complaints.

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, I was worried that Ripper was going to kick me out of the booth.

Vincent (to Ripper): Well, since you're not doing anything productive, do you want a drink? :-P (to Mouse) No worries. I'm plying him with alcohol. Keep spinning.

Mouse (to Vincent): Will do!

Ripper (to Vincent): Yeah, my usual... And, could you put the blonde guys on my tab?

Vincent (to Ripper): Can do. Shall I send him your way?

Ripper (to Vincent): I actually know him, but you can send him this way, if you'd like.

Vincent (to Ripper): Will do! Would you like me to send any other cute wayward souls I find wandering about to you as well? :-P

Ripper (to Vincent): Sure, since I seem to be redundant this evening. :-)

Vincent (to Ripper): Ha ha ha! I'm sure you're not redundant, Professor. Enjoy the time off! Though, if you really want to take over the decks, let me know, and we'll see if we can get Eep to Mouse wrangle for you.

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, the whole club is coming your way... We got shut down for the night...

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, I won't complain about getting an influx of burlesque dancers. What happened, hun? Is everything OK?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh honey, there was a very obvious costume malfunction during a performance & someone ratted us out to the fuzz.

Vincent (to Poppy): For heavens sake! I'd be sending praises to God for a wardrobe malfunction at a burlesque performance not calling the fuzz. Ooo. That's maybe something I shouldn't admit out loud.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you're such a boy sometimes.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Guilty as charged. What do you want, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, honey, what I want isn't on the menu... So, I guess a dirty martini will have to suffice. ;-)

Vincent (to Poppy): Heh. Well, ma'am. Legally, I'm not sure I can offer you anything that's not on the menu. Here's your martini.

Poppy (to Vincent): Thank you, honey... Are you giving me the cold shoulder? Because, if you are, it's kind of a turn on.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I wasn't trying to give you the cold shoulder, hun. But, I'll keep that in mind for the future, hun.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh. I wasn't sure if this was part of the punishment...

Vincent (to Poppy): Heh. Just working tonight. Though, if you're insistent on being punished, I'm sure we can work something out.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, honey, I'm definitely game if it means you stop staring at my co-workers. :-P

Vincent (to Poppy): They wore their work uniforms! It's hardly fair. Besides, it isn't as though they're the only ones getting looks, hun. If I'm not mistaken, that gentleman drooling over you to your left would love to buy you a drink.

Poppy (to Vincent): HAHA, Not really my type, honey, but thank you for the ego boost.

Vincent (to Poppy): Heh. You can hardly fault him for his taste. If I buy you a drink, will you forgive me my wandering eyes?

Poppy (to Vincent): Hmmm, I don't know, honey... Desdemona now seems overly taken with you & I'm not sure I want to interfere. :-)

Vincent (to Poppy): Desdemona? Which one of the tittering trio is she?

Poppy (to Vincent): She's the blonde that keeps flirting with you, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ah! The one with the, er, décolletage. Wait. Don't they all think I'm dating you at the mo?

Poppy (to Vincent): Desdemona doesn't usually like boys, so I didn't think it mattered much, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Heh, I hate to break her heart, but I think I've got more than enough sexuality and gender issues for one relationship. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Your loss, honey. I hear tell that Desdemona does Yoga and some sort of tantric nonsense. ;-)

Ripper (to Vincent): Hey Captain, I wouldn't mind, you know, getting back to doing my job...

Vincent (to Ripper): Alright. Alright. Don't get your knickers in a knot. Let's see what we can do. (to Eep) Hey, Slim. Can you do me a HUGE favor?

Eep (to Vincent): Uh... that depends on what it is.

Vincent (to Eep): Ask my sister to let Ripper have the decks back for me. I think he'd like to finish off the night.

Eep (to Vincent): Uhhh... I'll mention it to her, but after everything I'm not all that inclined to ask her to stop if she wants to DJ. (to Mouse) Hey pretty lady. Having fun?

Mouse (to Eep): Hi sexy man... just a bit. Ripper wants the decks back, huh? (to Ripper) You can come takeover, Professor. I'm done cramping your style. :-)

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Uh, yeah. Sorry. They kinda decided to sick me on you. I think they might be afraid of upsetting you. :p

Ripper (to Mouse): Thank you... You are always welcome to come back to work, you know?

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, yeah... I already told Ripper he could come back. (to Ripper) I know.

Eep (to Mouse): Well, you could come over here and hang out with me, if you're up to it.

Mouse (to Eep): I'm always up to that. You just happen to be one of my favorite people to hang out with. :-)

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 38

Professor Maladori (to Hiiri): Your charming little assistant should arrive with your order shortly. You really should teach him to keep his grubby mitts to himself.

Hiiri: My one & only true love is this... I live for power. After all, is there a person in all this wretched world who doesn't? I mean, I could pretend to be humble & say things like I live for the animals or that all people should be free. But, we'd all know I was lying... and, I do value honesty. What can be more harmful than the truth, at times?

Carver (to Hiiri): Good morning, ma'am. I have coffee, scones, and a delivery for you from Professor Maladori, ma'am.

Hiiri (to Carver): Oh, excellent, little brother! You are too good to me.

Carver (to Hiiri): Of course, ma'am. Did we ever tell you what we discovered about Poppy, ma'am? We ran into her in New London.

Hiiri (to Carver): Oh really? I don't believe you did.

Carver (to Hiiri): We apologize for the oversight, ma'am. We're not certain how, but seems as though Ms Poppy is no longer an automaton, ma'am. We have to admit, we were expecting more of a fight out of her when we first encountered her, ma'am. It was disappointing. She certainly didn't bleed like an automaton, ma'am. That part was lovely.

Hiiri (to Carver): Well, that is definitely interesting, little brother. Perhaps, you should find out more about this new state of affairs?

Carver (to Hiiri): Of course, ma'am. It would be our pleasure, ma'am. We hope you'll forgive our curiosity, but is the delivery from Professor Maladori mean repairs are made to your portal device?

Hiiri (to Carver): That is, indeed, what I'm hoping & I also asked her for something special for you. Look in the box with the bow.

Carver (to Hiiri): We are speechless, ma'am. This is beauty personified! We have long dreamed of a Châtellerault folding knife, ma'am! To have two of them is more than we could have dreamed! One for Carver and one for Other Carver. Thank you, ma'am! Do they have any of Professor Maladori's signature improvements, ma'am?

Hiiri (to Carver): I thought you would like them, little brother. And, I asked Maladori to do a few minor adjustments. There should be a booklet.

Carver (to Hiiri): So there is, ma'am. We promise to make you very proud you gifted these beauties to us. We'll make you so very proud, ma'am.

Hiiri (to Carver): I know you will, little brother. Now, run off & play. And, while you're out bring me some news of this new Poppy...

Carver (to Hiiri): We shall, ma'am! We'll let you know what we find out.

Ripper (to Vincent): Good morning, Captain. Any word?

Vincent (to Ripper): Morning, Professor. Nary a peep. I haven't decided whether or not I'm going to freak out just yet. Would you like some coffee?

Ripper (to Vincent): Sure, coffee would be great. I've got class shortly. But, I thought I should stop by & check on you.

Vincent (to Ripper): Thanks for checking up on me. I'm fine. I suppose this is my karmic retribution for of those times I crossed over without my sister's knowledge or against her wishes.

Ripper (to Vincent): Well, I'm glad you're doing better. You seemed pretty upset last night.

Vincent (to Ripper): Oh, make no mistake, I'm still royally pissed and plenty worried. Poppy had a run in with Carver a few days ago, and he's... He gets more than a little fixated on people. But, I can't really throw an epic Bitch Fit because Poppy is acting like me.

Ripper (to Vincent): Are you sure she's acting like you & not, acting like herself? I mean, how much do you really know about her & what her life was like before she met you?

Vincent (to Ripper): Oh good heavens! That sounded completely self-centered, didn't it? Heh. I don't mean to imply I caused her to act like this. I mean, I'm getting a taste of my own medicine, and I'm trying not to act like a spoiled brat over it. I don't know how much success I'm having.

Ripper (to Vincent): I think under the circumstances, you're allowed to be upset.

Vincent (to Ripper): Thanks, Professor. Though, are you sure you really want to encourage me to act like a sullen pissant? Hee hee. I'm just kidding.

Ripper (to Vincent): Heh. I'm sure you'll be fine. I've gotta run, but if you decide that you need to crossover to the other side, let me know. I've got a few people that owe me a favor or two & they can give us a ride to New London.

Vincent (to Ripper): Excellent! I know I keep saying this, but thank you so much. I really do appreciate it.

Ripper (to Vincent): Well, I know how I'd feel if I were in your shoes, so don't worry about it. I'll talk to you later, Captain.

Vincent (to Ripper): Later, tater.

Poppy (to Percy): Honey, I need you to meet me at the Hungry Rat Tavern.

Percy (to Poppy): Honey, it's a little early for drinking, don't you think? ... Who am I kidding it's never too early?

Poppy (to Percy): It's not for drinking, you tin-plated poodle. I've got Markus tied up in a room, I need you to bring him back to Newgate before he regains consciousness. He's going to be a wee bit grumpy.

Percy (to Poppy): Oh... Is that any way to treat your family, honey?

Poppy (to Percy): Well, we didn't see eye to eye about his incarceration, so I did what was necessary.

Percy (to Poppy): Alright, I'll be there shortly.

An hour or so later:

Percy (to Poppy): Wow, honey, you did a really good job of tying Markus to the chair... Letting out some of your frustrations, were we?

Poppy (to Percy): Well, I didn't want him to get hurt... which was likely to happen if he kept fighting me about going back to Newgate.

Percy (to Percy): Heehee, touché, honey... I'll get him back right now. Shouldn't you be heading back to the pint-sized Romeo?

Poppy (to Percy): Well, that's a lot nicer than what you've called him in the past... But, you're right, I should get back. He's probably pissed off at me for taking his car & running off.

Percy (to Poppy): I'm sooo glad to not be in your shoes, at the moment, honey. See you later!

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Poppy): Why hello poppet, I think it's about time for a little family reunion.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Oh hi there, Fatty Bo Batty... I mean, Mister von Clegg. I'd love to have a little get together with you, sometime. But, now really isn't good for me, honey. I really need to get back home.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Poppy): Oh... If only that were one of your options right now... Stinkblossom. But its really in your best interest to come see me before Hiiri's little ghoul, Carver, finds you first.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg):  Honey, you promised to never call me that in public... And, what have you heard about Carver? I ran into him a few days ago... It was a very unpleasant meeting & I wasn't prepared.

Thaddeus von Clegg: I always love to visit lawyers... People after my own heart all of them. <3 (to Poppy) Don't worry about me calling you that in public all the strapping young men and women around you are with me. Secondly, I heard that a certain young sociopath has been given permission to play with you and word is he has new toys. And thirdly, it wasn't an invitation, walk or be carried?

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Oh dear... I guess I'll walk...

Percy: Shoot! This is not good... (to Vincent) Honey... I don't mean to be an alarmist, but Poppy just walked away in the opposite direction from where she was supposed to be heading. There was a group of people with her & she seemed concerned. I've got a prisoner delivery to Newgate, so I can't follow her.

Vincent (to Percy): What? Shit! What do the people look like? What direction are they headed?

Percy (to Vincent): They were the most suspiciously average, ordinary looking people I've ever seen. They were heading towards the courthouse.

Vincent (to Percy): Right. Thank you for letting me know, Percy. If you hear or see or remember anything else, please contact me.

Percy (to Vincent): Will do, honey.

Vincent (to Percy): I'll contact you when I crossover. I need to see about getting a ride. (to Ripper) Professor, I need to take you up on your offer of a ride.

Ripper (to Vincent): Oh shit! How quickly do you need it? I need to make a call.

Vincent (to Ripper): As quickly as you can arrange it. I just received word from Percy that Poppy seems to have been escorted off by a group of... Well, suspiciously normal, average looking people in New London.

Ripper (to Vincent): Oh... that sounds terrifying? I should be able to grab you in 10 minutes. I'll make my TA takeover my classes for the day.

Vincent (to Ripper): When have you EVER run into someone in New London you would describe as normal and average-looking? Now, have you ever run into a whole gang of them?

Ripper (to Vincent): Aaah, semantics... You say tomato, I say tomato.

Vincent (to Ripper): Well, if I'm wrong, and everything is fine, you can laud your superiority over my judgement, and I'll buy you a case of beer. Oh shit. I should call my sister. (to Mouse) Hey, sweetie. I have a lot of info for you, and not much time to relay it.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh ok... what's up?

Vincent (to Mouse): Oh God... There's so much. Let me sum up.

Mouse (to Vincent): Ok, Inigo Montoya...

Vincent (to Mouse): Poppy got news last night that her brother was injured while trying to help contain a prison riot. She took my car... Crossed over, and took the Falcon to find one of her other brothers who was involved. I just got a message from Percy... He spotted her walking in the opposite direction she was supposed to be headed, looking concerned, and... surrounded by a group suspiciously average looking people. Ripper's checking with some of his contacts on the other side, to get us a ride to New London. There may be nothing to worry about, but...

Mouse (to Vincent): Sweetie, don't you think you might be overreacting? I mean, a group of average looking people... how is that worrisome?

Vincent (to Mouse): In New London, it's worrisome. It's like walking into a room and finding that everyone is dressed the same. Plus, Percy was worried enough to contact me. I don't know. It seems unsettling to me. I'm probably wrong. I'm HOPING I'm wrong, but... Well, what if I'm not?

Mouse (to Vincent): Well, what do you want me to do? I can be ready to go in five minutes.

Vincent (to Mouse): It's OK, hun. I just wanted to let you know what was happening. If I need you, trust me, I'll be calling. I've got to go. It looks like Ripper is here. I should be back, shortly. I love you.

Mouse (to Vincent): I love you, too! Be safe.

Ripper (to Vincent): Alright, looks like Captain Every will meet us at the crossover point.

Vincent (to Ripper): Great. Thanks, Professor. For what it's worth, my sister agrees with you. You both think I'm nuts.

Ripper (to Vincent): I don't think you're nuts, just a little overprotective… And, maybe a little nuts.

Vincent (to Ripper): Heh. Well, if y'all are right, I'll wear a t-shirt for a week that says "I'm an idiot." Well... Maybe not a week. Maybe a day. Ooo! If I don't stop saying "y'all" this week...

Ripper (to Vincent): Heh. You have been saying it a lot. So, do you want me to come with you or do you want to solo this?

Vincent (to Ripper): Mmm. The accent starts to come out when I'm upset, or drunk, or both and it seems I've been upset a lot this week. I'm not going to turn down any help you may want to offer, Professor, but I certainly won't be insulted if you want to stay.

Ripper (to Vincent): Well, as everyone has pointed out I'm not much good in a fight, but I can at least lend another pair of eyes for the search.

Vincent (to Ripper): Thank you. Percy last spotted Poppy near the New London courthouse, so that's the best place to start, I'd say.

Ripper (to Vincent): Do you have any idea as to who these "average" folks might be?

Vincent (to Ripper): I have some theories. We can rule out anything having to do with the Royal Guard. They would be in uniform. It would have to be a group that doesn't want to be recognized, and doesn't need to rely on visual intimidation, so... well organized, well armed, and well funded.

Ripper (to Vincent): The Legion of Doom? Cobra? ... Sorry, I'm just kidding.

Vincent (to Ripper): Um, well, kind of. I think it might be CLANNG. Poppy has a personal connection to them, sort of, so it makes sense.

Ripper (to Vincent): Oh... Wait. You're serious? I thought they were just a rumor.

Vincent (to Ripper): I wish they were. Ooo! I hope that's not the case. I already don't have the best track record with CLANNG.

Ripper (to Vincent): Well, everything that I've heard about them just sounded too far-fetched to be real. Clearly, I should stop doubting things and just believe it when it comes to this place.

Vincent (to Ripper): Ha ha ha! Well, don't believe everything. Most of the rumors about pirates are self-serving fibs. Hee. Including yours truly.

Ripper (to Vincent): Well, I know that, but there's usually a grain of truth in some of them.

Vincent (to Ripper): Usually, but not always. I can think of, at least, one that I completely fabricated. Speaking of rumors...

Hiiri (to Carver): Little brother, I've just been informed that The Fancy has taken on some passengers that we might be of interest to us. Any chance, you can pop over & give a looksy?

Carver (to Hiiri): Of course, ma'am. We'd be delighted, ma'am.

Hiiri (to Carver): Send my thanks to Captain Every for the message.

Vincent (to Ripper): How much do you trust Captain Every? I've hear some less than flattering things.

Ripper (to Vincent): I don't trust him very much at all, but he owed me a ride. I helped him out once when his airship was grounded. He was the first to respond & since it was a one way trip, I didn't think it would be too much trouble. Should we depart sooner than later?

Vincent (to Ripper): I think so. He seemed WAY too pleased to meet me... In fact, I'd suggest slipping out the back, quietly, as soon as we've docked.

Ripper (to Vincent): Sounds like a plan... Sorry, about this. I'm apparently not cut out for this whole sneaky business.

Vincent (to Ripper): Hee hee. I think that's the first time anyone has ever apologized to me for not being disreputable. Looks like we're docking...

Ripper (to Vincent): Lead the way...

Vincent (to Ripper): We'll just slip out of the hold. There's a cargo door down there I should be able to open...

Carver (to Vincent & Ripper): Leaving already? We think you gentleman would really rather stay. Attempting to go could get rather messy.

Ripper (to Vincent & Carver): Oh shit!

Percy (to Carver): Didn't anyone tell you, it's not nice to play with knives, honey? (to Ripper & Vincent) Hi there fellas! If you would kindly exit out of the rear of the ship. We'll get the hell out of here.

Vincent (to Carver): And I'd really advise you to stay right the hell where you are, Carver. We are leaving. (to Percy) Percy! Thank God in heaven!

Carver (to Percy): Percy? We don't think that seems quite right. Am I correct in guessing you're part of the reason Ms Poppy is now flesh and blood rather than clockwork, sir?

Percy (to Vincent): As if I wouldn't be monitoring the docks & communications, honey. (to Carver) Oh well, honey, I do so value your thoughts & opinions... and, highly suggest you mind your own business. Also, I am not above shooting you... in fact, it would be nice to have you out of the way.

Carver (to Percy): It wouldn't be the first time, sir. We really don't find that much of a threat. Not really at all. As a point of interest, sir. Other Carver is daring you to do it. I'm not sure...

Percy (to Carver): Well, you did ask for it.

Vincent (to Ripper & Percy): Oh MY GOD. He talks FAR too much. Check him to make sure he's unconscious, won't you, Professor?

Ripper (to Vincent): He's breathing... Should we take him with us or leave him?

Vincent (to Ripper): Well, good. I didn't want to actually kill the little nutbag. Leave him here. Let Captain Every deal with him. He's more trouble than he's worth. And leave those bloody knives of his! If we take them, or even throw them overboard, I have the feeling he'll come looking for them.

Ripper (to Vincent): Alright, you're the boss.

Percy (to Vincent & Ripper): I don't know about you two, but that felt incredibly satisfying... the little monster.

Vincent (to Percy): More than I'd like to admit. Though, I would have enjoyed it more… if you zapped him when I WASN'T right behind him. Though maybe getting shot AND hit in the head would have been the only way to stop him. Creepy little bastard.

Percy (to Vincent): Oops. Sorry about that, honey... He just kept nattering on.

Vincent (to Percy): I'm just glad you're a good shot!

Percy (to Vincent & Ripper): Shall we get the hell out of here, gentlemen? I've got a ship docked nearby.

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): Yes, please! I don't want to chance this little twat waking back up while we're anywhere in the vicinity.

Percy (to Vincent & Ripper): Alright, the Clementine is this way.

Ripper (to Percy): The Clementine?

Percy (to Ripper): Yes, I named it after my pet magpie that I used to have.

Vincent (to Ripper & Percy): Heh. Well, I named mine after a Humphrey Bogart movie, so I can't really judge

Ripper (to Vincent & Percy): No, I wasn't judging. For a second I thought you might have named it after the fruit... Sorry, I'm a bit shaken. That little nutter was a bit of a shock.

Percy (to Ripper): Awww, don't worry, handsome. I wouldn't have let anything happen to either of you.

Vincent (to Percy): When did you get your own ship, hun?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh... it was mine... I mean, Poppy's from before... She gave it to me to use, we did a trade.

Vincent (to Ripper & Percy): Under normal circumstances, I'd recommend this AFTER we were all home safe and sound, but here.

Ripper (to Vincent): What is it?

Percy (to Vincent): I'll hold off until after we're in the air. So, where to, honey?

Vincent (to Ripper): Don't worry. It's not Captain Birdie's rum. That would have probably eaten through the flask. It's bourbon. (to Percy) I thought we'd try the courthouse to see if we can pick up any leads there.

Ripper (to Vincent): That will work... thanks.

Percy (to Vincent): Alright, we'll head that way.

Vincent (to Percy): I'm a bit afraid we're dealing with CLANNG, hun.

Percy (to Vincent): Honey, they wouldn't hurt Poppy... I don't think.

Vincent (to Percy): Probably not. I hope. Any suggestions on how we approach this?

Percy (to Vincent): Hmmm, have you tried contacting Poppy now that you've crossed over?

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): Oh. Uh... Is there anyway I can answer this question without making myself look like an idiot?

Percy (to Vincent): Do you really want me to answer that, honey?

Ripper (to Vincent): HAHAHA...

Vincent (to Percy): Yuck it up, you two. (to Poppy) Hi, hun. Are you alright? Percy seems to think you've been escorted somewhere against your will.

Percy (to Vincent): Sorry, honey.

Ripper (to Vincent): Sorry, Captain.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): I'm sorry. Poppy can't come to the phone right now. Would you like to leave a message?

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Oh, hello, governor. I was just looking for my captain, sir. I was told to meet her at a certain place and time & she was a no show.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Will you please give me my phone back?

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): HAHA! Your accent is terrible. Who is this? Poppy's not a captain of anything. (to Poppy) Just a minute... this is interesting.

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Well, damn. And here I spent all that time on those voice lessons. I think I've been ripped off, don't you? Name's Perfect Tommy. I'm not really sure how much more the Captain would like me to reveal, sir. It's a bit of a private matter. YOU sound like quite the intriguing fellow, however. Do you ever get down the the Gardens, sir?  If you do, you should come see me at Madam Chatterley's. I make QUITE an impressive spectacle of myself. I can put you on the list.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): Oh, how you do go on... you're that young lady that was with her the last time, weren't you?

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Hee hee hee. You got my number in one, sir! I'm afraid I can be a terrible chatterbox. I'm also afraid I'm not a young lady. Of course, you'll never know the difference in the dark.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Dear God! Give me back my phone, Fatty or I swear I'm going to kick you.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): No, no... I was told there was a young lady with her - black mohawk, overly tight pants, painted like a jezebel. Must have been someone else, then. But, really that's neither here nor there... Oh, Poppy seems pretty adamant about me giving her back her phone. But, I have one question for you... so, is there anything going on between the two of you, I should know? (to Poppy) Hush, stinkblossom, the menfolk are talking.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): I will kill you...

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Why, sir. Are you hoping I'm available? Because I'm UTTERLY available. Remember, it's Perfect Tommy. At Madam C's in the Gardens. I'd love to see you sometime.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): Oh my... OW...

Poppy (to Vincent): Sorry, about that, honey...  I would have contacted you, but Mister von Clegg whisked me a way a bit suddenly. (to Thaddeus von Clegg) Stop being a pain & go set a henchman on fire or something.

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Poppy): Oooh, I do like firing henchman. I'll give you some privacy with your "crewman".

Vincent (to Poppy): That's alright, Captain. I've got the rest of the crew here. I'm afraid we had a bit of a run-in with a friend of yours. Hopefully he's still sleeping off a massive, horrible migraine. Are you OK?

Poppy (to Vincent): Yes, yes. I'm being treated nicely, if a bit "prisoner-like". Apparently, Mister von Clegg heard tell that a certain tiny terror has been given permission to play with me. So, he brought me here, wherever here is for my own protection. Are you okay? I'm sorry that I dragged you away from Chatterley's.

Vincent (to Poppy): I'm sure the Madam can survive without me for an evening. Would your host be willing to part with you, if we could promise safe passage and give him a lead on a place where that little psycho might be currently unconscious?

Poppy (to Vincent): Let me check with him... (to Thaddeus von Clegg) It looks like Carver is currently unconscious somewhere thanks to my crew... If they tell you where he is, can I go home?

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Poppy): Hmmm, that might be a nice bargaining chip with Hiiri… I suppose. Hand me the phone, stinkblossom. (to Vincent) So, you have the small sociopath somewhere? Do tell.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): It's a very good thing your henchman took my weapons, Fatteus...

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Ooo! I get to talk to you again. I'm a lucky fellow! We may know where the mini monster is stashed. We'd love to have our boss lady back again, however. Can you make that happen for us, big man?

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): I think that can be arranged. Tell us where Carver is, and I'll tell you where you can pick up your delicate flower of a Captain. OW! (to Poppy) Woman will you stop kicking me. I'm trying to arrange your release. We have a reputation to maintain. It's hard to be feared, if we just keep letting lovely ladies go for no reason.

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): He should be unconscious in the hold of Captain Every's ship, the Fancy. It should currently be docked at the New London port. They should be experiencing some "engine troubles."

Thaddeus von Clegg (to Vincent): Excellent! Your dear poppet is presently at the Royal Arms Hotel in the Hadrian suite. I so, wish that I could stay & pay my respects in person, "Perfect Tommy". However, duty calls... (to Poppy) Now, poppet, you wait right here to be "rescued". Should I leave a couple henchman for funsies? I think I will... toodles.

Poppy (to Thaddeus von Clegg): And, to think, you're one of my nicer brothers...

Vincent (to Thaddeus von Clegg): Oh pooh. Well, you'll just have to visit me some other time then, sir. I'd love to finally meet you in person. Tell my Captain we'll see her shortly!

Percy (to Vincent): So, any luck, honey?

Vincent (to Percy): She's at the Royal Arms Hotel in the Hadrian suite. I'm hoping we can just walk in and grab her, but somehow I doubt it. I don't expect Mr. Clegg to make things that easy on us.

Ripper (to Vincent): Perfect Tommy, huh?

Vincent (to Ripper): Hey, don't look at me! I didn't come up with that name.

Ripper (to Vincent): Hmmm... I totally believe you. :-p

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): You can both close your mouths now, incidentally. :-P

Percy (to Vincent & Ripper): Alright, let's go get her & then get you to your ship.

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): Are you sure? You two don't want to make fun of me a little while longer? :-P

Ripper (to Vincent): That is very tempting, but I'm sure you want to get your ship back.

Percy (to Vincent): Honey, we can do that as we rescue Poppy.

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): Oh good. I'd hate for you to miss out on making fun of me time. Shall we go?

Percy (to Vincent): Of course, honey.

An hour or so later:

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): OK, gang. We're here, so who wants to head in with me?

Percy (to Vincent & Ripper): Oh honey, it's all you. I'll wait here as backup.

Ripper (to Percy & Vincent): I guess, it looks like it's me.

Vincent (to Ripper & Percy): It's fine. You two stay here. If I'm not back in 5 minutes, wait some more.

A few minutes later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh. Hi honey, thanks for coming...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hey, hun. Hee hee! Why am I not surprised to find you sitting atop a pile of prone minions?

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, sorry honey, I got tired of waiting. :-)

Vincent (to Percy & Ripper): Well. I was delightfully unnecessary. (to Ripper) Can you do me a favor, Professor? Could you call Captain Every and warn him he may want to dump his unconscious passenger, and warn him that CLANNG is looking to get their hands on Carver. If he hasn't learned this first hand already.

Ripper (to Vincent): Sure. I'm glad Poppy is okay.

Vincent (to Ripper): You and me both. (to Percy) Percy, would you mind giving us a ride to the Falcon?

Percy (to Vincent): Well, if you'd like I could take Ripper home… Don't you two want some celebratory alone time? :-p

Vincent (to Percy): Why? Looking to score some alone time with Ripper?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh well, the thought hadn't crossed my mind, but now that you mention it... He is a good kisser.

Vincent (to Ripper): Sorry, Professor. (to Percy) If you're quite finished mocking me, I really would like to get home.

Percy (to Vincent): Oh calm down. (to Poppy) Where'd you leave the Falcon?

Poppy (to Percy): It's parked near Abney.

Percy (to Poppy): Perfect! (to Vincent & Ripper) We'll be at the Falcon in five minutes.

A few minutes later:

Vincent (to Poppy & Ripper): There she is! Good heavens. Let's get the hell out of here. (to Percy) Thanks for your help today, hun.

Percy (to Vincent, Poppy & Ripper): Ok, I'm off to rendezvous with the Davenports. Take care of yourselves.

Vincent (to Poppy & Ripper): Guh! Do either of you want a pull of this flask?

Ripper (to Vincent): Yessiree.

Poppy (to Vincent): Actually, I'm good, honey. Thank you, though. (to Ripper) Honey, can I get you to untie this corset? I've been trapped in this thing since last night.

Vincent (to Ripper): Here you go, Professor. Feel free to finish it off if you want. There's only so much bourbon that I can handle.

Ripper (to Vincent): Oh, thanks. I think I need it. (to Poppy) Oh sure... Is this okay?

Poppy (to Ripper): Perfect! Thank you, honey.

Vincent (to Ripper & Poppy): Alright. We've docked, gang. Ready to head home?

Ripper (to Vincent & Poppy): I'm so ready.

Poppy (to Vincent): Yes, I badly want a hot soak in a bath & a glass of red wine.

Vincent (to Ripper & Poppy): We've landed. (to Ripper) Thanks for your help, Professor. I hope your psyche isn't scarred too badly. :-P

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 37

Mouse (to Eep): Hey, want some coffee? You look a bit zombified. Do you have to work today?

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Coffee be good. Thanks. Um, what's today? Wednesday? No. I'm off today.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, when we're both a little more awake, do you want to maybe go do something? I just realized that I haven't left the house since Sunday other than to go and harass Vincent & Poppy yesterday.

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah, sure. Jesus. You're gonna turn into a weird, reclusive cat lady if we're not careful.

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah... Have you noticed that the kittens seem to be a bit more aware then most kittens?

Eep (to Mouse): Uh, yeah... I was trying to ignore that.

Mouse (to Eep): We're going to be surrounded by super cats, aren't we? We may want to abandon the apartment & run away now while we still can.:-P

Eep (to Mouse): Knowing our luck? Probably. I think the only logical course of action is to move out of the state. Probably out of the country.

Mouse (to Eep): My thoughts exactly... Europe?

Eep (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! Sure. Or Canada. Should be nice this time of the year, right? From the way he's glaring at me, I don't think Otto appreciates the escape plan.

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, sometimes he doesn't get humor... Have you come up with names for the kittens, yet?

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. No names yet. Have you thought of anything? I wasn't sure if Otto'd be insulted if we named his kids or not.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, he hasn't told me what he wants to call them, so I figured we could... The little gray boy I was thinking should be Max.

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Max? I like it. Why Max?

Mouse (to Eep): I don't know he reminds of the little blue meanie from the yellow submarine.

Eep (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! That's... disturbingly accurate.

Mouse (to Eep): heehee, I'm glad you like it... Wanna go for a walk & get some ice cream or something?

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Ice cream sounds really damn good right about now. So. Uh... the "pirate" thing. You still wanna do it with Vincent?

Mouse (to Eep): Yes, yes I think I do, if it's okay with you? At the moment, I can't seem to behave properly at a normal job on this side.

Eep (to Mouse): I'm still not crazy about it, but if it's something you wanna do, I'll support you.

Mouse (to Eep): I wouldn't want you any other way... And, I promise this is just temporary, until I feel like I can go back to deejaying.

Eep (to Mouse): I know Vincent doesn't want anything to happen to you either, and he really is more like a ridiculously dressed delivery boy... Fair warning though, I'm gonna worry and I'm gonna pout and be a huge pain in your ass.

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, he's actually not that bad when it's just the two of us... Of course, I have a feeling Poppy will be joining us.

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Well, I didn't think it'd be forever. I mean, you're going to be sharing tight quarters with Vincent. That can get old fast. Course, you did live with him, so maybe you have a higher threshold for him than I do. Heh. I already know you have a higher threshold for me than he does.

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, I think they're seeing each other, but neither of them will admit... It's kind of odd & cute in a way.

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. I think so. Those two are so... Uh. So, Poppy and Vincent.

Mouse (to Eep): I suppose, but it's just funny.

Eep (to Mouse): Well, it's definitely odd. It's THEM. Though, with their history I guess I can understand them not wanting to say anything.

Mouse (to Eep): So, strange question... Are you going to be crewing with us?

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. I didn't say it wasn't funny. :p

Mouse (to Eep): Well, would it make you feel better if you were with us or will you be fine when we go on a run?

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Uh, I hadn't really thought about it. I'm not really any good at doing anything on the ship except reading the maps. Well, I feel better when I'm there, that's for damn sure, but I don't wanna get in the way.

Mouse (to Eep): I don't think you get in the way, plus you're good at navigating... but, you'll probably have to take it up with the Captain. :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Ha ha ha! Oh God... I'm not sure if I wanna do that. God only knows what it'll entail.

Mouse (to Eep): Sooo... how do you like living with me? I mean, now that it's not temporary. :-)

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. Heh. I, um, I like it. Uh...is everything OK for you? I mean, are you, uh... Do you like living with me still?

Mouse (to Eep): Oh... I was hoping you hated it... heehee. I'm just kidding. I actually really like living with you.

Several hours later:

Percy: I need a dessert. Hmmm... Something not too filling, fruity with ladyfingers... Well, speak of the devil. (to Vincent) Oh hi there, Vincent.

Vincent (to Percy): Hi, hun. Should you be out in the rain? You might short something. Or melt. Which is it again?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh you! I have good news, honey. We're not mad at each other anymore. I've forgiven you.

Vincent (to Percy): Oh good. I was losing sleep over it. What's prompted this change in heart?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh, you're funny, honey. I'm sorry for acting like such a harpy. There I said it. Now, let's go get a drink & look at boys.

Vincent (to Percy): What are you after, Percy?

Percy (to Vincent): Honey, you don't seem to understand what just happened here... I've never apologized to anyone without a court order.

Vincent (to Percy): And I appreciate it, hun. I sincerely do, but you certainly can't blame me for being a bit dubious.

Percy (to Vincent): Look, honey, I got tired of not knowing how to act around you. Do I like you? Do I hate you? Do I have an outrageous accent?

Vincent (to Percy): Oh. Well, I can say with certainty that you didn't spontaneously spring an accent. And, provided you have no ulterior motives I'm not opposed to getting a drink with you sometime.

Percy (to Vincent): No time like the present, honey, my treat.

Vincent (to Percy): Well, alright then, hun. Lead the way.

Percy (to Vincent): How about the Frog & Toad, honey? They've got guinness on tap.

Vincent (to Percy): I certainly can't object to that.

Thirty minutes later:

Percy (to Vincent): Wow, honey, you really downed that beer. Am I making you nervous?

Vincent (to Percy): A tad, hun. You're acting oddly, and not because you apologized. Is there something you want to tell me?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh well, you're right, honey, I did have a bit of an ulterior motive for asking you here... Let me grab you another beer.

Vincent (to Percy): Thanks, hun. What's going on?

Percy (to Vincent): Oh honey, I need you to tell Poppy something that I know she's not going to be happy about...

Vincent (to Percy): Oh shit.

Percy (to Vincent): I'm sorry honey, but I figured she might take it better coming from you...

Vincent (to Percy): No doubt. Now would be a great time to buy me another beer, hun.

A couple hours later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Hey honey, how was your night? I was just about to head to bed.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hey, hun. I, uh, I have some bad news. Do you want a drink?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh. If is this the kind of bad news where you think I need a drink, I should probably not have one right this second, then. But, you may want to prepare one for me for afterwards.... uh, I'm afraid to ask what it is.

Vincent (to Poppy): I wish there was some easier way to say this. I ran into Percy this evening. It's your brother, Bernard, hun.

Poppy (to Vincent): What happened? Is he alright?

Vincent (to Poppy): There was a prison break at Newgate. Bernard's battalion was called to help contain the riot, and... He's alive, but he was badly injured. He's being treated at St. Mary's. And, um, apparently, Markus escaped. I'm so sorry, sweetie.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh god... I've got to get to the hospital... and then, I've got to find Markus. Shoot. Thank you for telling me, honey... where'd I put my damn shoes?

Vincent (to Poppy): Poppy. Poppy. Calm down. Sit down, hun. There's nothing you can do right this second. It's the middle of the night.

Poppy (to Vincent): But Molly, Bernard's wife, is probably scared out of her wits with worry & she's pregnant... I need to go. Oh god, this is terrible... I can't lose another brother.

Vincent (to Poppy): I know, sweetie. I know. Calm down. Let's figure this out, OK? Do you know where your sister-in-law will be?

Poppy (to Vincent): She'll either be at the hospital with Bernard or at their house in Pleasant Street. It's right outside the Tombs.

Vincent (to Poppy): I don't know that the hospital will let you in if she's there, but we can check her house. Oh God. I am drunk. Fucking Percy...

Poppy (to Vincent): What? Why wouldn't they let me in, I'm his sister? ... Honey, I don't expect you to have to deal with this stuff. You stay, sober up & relax. I'll be back as quick as I can.

Vincent (to Poppy): Sweetie, I'm not going to make you do this alone.

Poppy (to Vincent): That's very sweet of you, but you're in no condition to come along, honey, and I'm going to have to move fast if I want to do all of the things I need to do & no offense, but in your present state you're going to slow me down.

Vincent (to Poppy): You act like this is the first run I've ever done inebriated, hun. I mean, I... Poppy? That's not my... That's my fucking car. Yep. Keys are gone. Poppy Meriwether, you sneaky, light fingered little...

Poppy (to Vincent): Sorry, honey, I'll be back as soon as I can.

Vincent (to Poppy): You could have just fucking asked, woman! Ooo. I am so fucking irritated right now!

Poppy (to Vincent): You would have been arguing with me all night & you know where that always leads us, honey... and there's no time for that. I've got to get to Markus before he leaves the city.

Vincent (to Poppy): I think I could have damn well been trusted not to try and get in your pants under the circumstances. And now you're going to confront your brother, your DANGEROUS brother, without any kind of help or back up. That's a much better plan.

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, I don't need help to deal with Markus... He's always relied on his good looks to get him out of trouble. Look, can you yell at me when I get back, honey? I've just arrived at the Old Piedmont... I do really appreciate the offer to be my shining knight, but trust me I can handle it.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo! I wasn't... Fine. FINE. Just be careful.

Poppy (to Vincent): I will, I promise... I uh, oh... nevermind... Crossing over now, honey.

Vincent: Well, isn't this just a peachy way to end the fucking evening?

Ripper (to Vincent): What's wrong, Captain?

Vincent (to Ripper): Poppy! She drove off in my car, is now flying off in my ship, and I'm stuck here pacing the apartment completely irritated! And fucking drunk, because her fucking automaton counterpart thinks alcohol is the best way to break bad news to someone. Ooo!

Ripper (to Vincent): Holy shit! Wait... What!?! Why would she do that? Uh... Is there anything I can do to help?

Vincent (to Ripper): One of her brothers was injured in a prison riot, and one of her other brothers was apparently involved. She wants to find him, and didn't want me "slowing her down," so she palmed my keys when I wasn't looking and slipped out. I know I have no one to blame but myself for playing the mimbo card for so damn long, but I swear to sweet baby Jesus... I am NOT as incompetent as y'all seem to think I am! I would have gone and gotten myself killed by now if I was.

Ripper (to Vincent): I'm sorry she left you behind... I don't think anyone thinks you're incompetent, you've proven several times that you're quite capable. I can understand your being upset, but I get the impression that Poppy can take care of herself. She'll probably be back before you know it. And, if she isn't, we can go find her.

Vincent (to Ripper): I'm sorry, Professor. I don't mean to rage all over you. I'm just... I'm drunk and pissed off. I think I covered that already. No. No. You're right. I'm sure she'll be fine. I'm just... Angry? Worried? Wounded in my professional pride? I don't know! I suppose the question now is whether I try to calm down enough to get to sleep or just continue drinking.

Ripper (to Vincent): Hmmm, you know, Captain, if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you sounded like a worried concerned boyfriend...

Vincent (to Ripper): Yes, yes, yes. You, Mouse, Eep... Y'all can keep telling me that all you want; it doesn't make it true. Well, shit. All I have in the apartment is Jack Daniel's or Captain Birdie's Pirate Adventure Rum.

Ripper (to Vincent): Oh god, don't drink that Captain Birdie stuff. It'll make you go blind.

Vincent (to Ripper): Ugh. Not to mention it's completely unpalatable. TRUST ME. No, no. I'm not desperate enough for either of these options.

Ripper (to Vincent): Hell, you should probably drink some water, calm down & get some sleep. You know, in case, you need to crossover...

Vincent (to Ripper): You're right, Professor. Thanks. I'll see what I can do about sleep. G'night.

Ripper (to Vincent): Look, don't worry, she'll be okay & I promise that if you need to crossover, I can get our hands on a ride. Good night.

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 36

Poppy (to Mouse): Good morning, honey... what's with the incessant knocking? Did someone hurt or dead? Would you like there to be?

Mouse (to Poppy): Heehee, you're a grouch first thing in the morning. I brought over hangover food & drink for you & Vincent... I thought you might need it, especially after the goofy phonecall I had last night. Umm... Is that what you slept in?

Poppy (to Mouse): Oh, uh, this shirt? It was uh, the first thing I grabbed... um, here let me take that stuff from you.

Mouse (to Poppy): Heehee... I didn't think ruffles were your thing. I'll make the food, if you start the coffee.

Poppy (to Mouse): Of course... I should probably go wake up Vincent. Be right back, honey. (to Vincent) Ummm, honey, your sister is here & she's making us hangover food & coffee.

Vincent (to Poppy): Huh? What? Oh good God. That's obnoxiously considerate... Let me put on pants.

Poppy (to Vincent): I know... And, I need to find my pajamas... I accidentally threw on your pirate shirt to answer the door. So, be warned.

Vincent (to Mouse): Good morn... Oh good heavens, it is FAR too bright in here. Ugh!

Mouse (to Vincent): Good morning, little brother... Here let me pull the blinds for you. I'm sorry to barge in, but I figured you two were going to be in no shape to properly recover from your day of drinking. So, I thought I'd come play nursemaid.

Vincent (to Mouse): Damnable sun. As I was saying, good morning. Well, you're certainly right about the hangover bit. Good God... Never mix rum, saké and rotgut, hun. It will end poorly.

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, so pirate adventure rum wasn't all it was cracked up to be?

Vincent (to Mouse): We ended up consuming it accidentally. It was exactly as dreadful as I feared it might be. I think I may be in violation of some kind of zoning law even having it in the apartment.

Poppy (to Mouse & Vincent): Oh god, it was awful... Can I sit here at the table & look miserable for a bit?

Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): Here you both look like you could use coffee... I'll have breakfast ready for you in a second. And I don't want to hear it... you're eating it, it'll make you feel better. (to Poppy) Did you change your clothes?

Poppy (to Mouse): Oh, uh, no... maybe... uh, yes.

Vincent (to Poppy): In case you haven't noticed, my sister is a bit of a tyrant caregiver. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): I can see that, but I feel too awful to object.

Vincent (to Poppy): Resistance is futile. She will assimilate and love us, whether we like it or not.

Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): You know, I'm standing right here...

Vincent (to Mouse): I know. I'd never be so gauche as to say that behind your back.

Poppy (to Mouse): heehee, sorry, honey. I do appreciate it. And, it looks amazing. Thank you.

Vincent (to Mouse): I know. I'd never be so gauche as to say that behind your back.

Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): Here's your breakfast... I'll clean up & then get out of your way.

Vincent (to Mouse): You know I'm only teasing you because I'm miserable. I appreciate it, hun. I always do. Oh! And don't run off without getting money out of me. I have your payment for our trip the other day. Oh good. I'm promise I'm not trying to be an ungrateful little brat. Thank you for breakfast, hun.

Mouse (to Vincent): I know, little brother, I'm not taking it personally. And, if you haven't noticed I haven't once asked why Poppy was wearing your shirt to answer the door. :-P I seem to recall your beau waking up in my knickers after an evening of serious drinking once.

Poppy (to Mouse & Vincent): And, that is my cue to go take a really long shower.

Mouse (to Vincent): Touché, little brother...

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. Let me get your cash… Ooo. Walking is not my friend right now. Here you go, hun. This is for you and Eep.

Mouse (to Vincent): Thank you! I'll let you get back to resting. I love you, little brother.

Vincent (to Mouse): I love you too, sweetie. Thanks again for taking care of us. I'll see you later.

Twenty minutes later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Is it safe, honey?

Vincent (to Poppy): All clear, hun. My sister has headed home.

Poppy (to Vincent): Thank goodness! I hope she didn't give you too much of a hard time.

Vincent (to Poppy): She tried, but I have WAY too much ammo on some of the silly things she's done while drunk.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, that's good, honey. I'm not embarrassed, by any means, I'd just like it to stay between us for a little while longer. I hope that's okay with you?

Vincent (to Poppy): That's fine, hun. I... Oh... Oh, good heavens. I'm not sure eating agreed with me.

Poppy (to Vincent): Go take up residence on the couch, honey. I'll get you some water.

Vincent (to Poppy): Thank you, hun. This is no less than what I deserve for mixing my liquors.

Poppy (to Vincent): I'll grab you a pillow & a blanket... Do you want to watch a movie or just lie about in anguish?

Vincent (to Poppy): Heh. I think I'm going to lie about in anguish no matter what I do. Let's turn on a movie, hun. I can only hope it will keep me from being too insufferable.

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, I'll be languishing on the floor, so not to worry. I wasn't feeling too bad until now... I may have still been drunk.

Vincent (to Poppy): Come lay down, hun. There's more than enough room on the couch.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, the only time you ever get to be the big spoon. Oh, I shouldn't laugh.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Oh, God. I shouldn't either...

Poppy (to Vincent): This is comfy & I'm probably going to fall asleep...

Vincent (to Poppy): Mmmm. I'm not promising I'll stay conscious myself.

Strange Ways Here We Come: Day 35

Poppy: I hate sitting in doctor's waiting rooms... for some reason, it always fills me with a sense of impending doom.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You look a bit ready to bolt for the door. How are you holding up, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): Um, like I'm about to bolt for the door... I'm not too fond of doctors, and my feelings for them have gotten worse. I think I've gotten a little skittish about them since my last experience with one was being put into stasis.

Vincent (to Poppy): I can't say that I blame you there, hun. Dr. Addison is wonderful. Don't worry. And, as I said, as long as she feels like you're going to be OK, she won't ask too many tough questions.

Poppy (to Vincent): Questions, I can handle... it's the antiseptic smell, the equipment... oh... no, no, I'm okay.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, hun! You look absolutely green around the gills. Come here. Lay your head down, and take nice even breaths.

Poppy (to Vincent):  I think I need a distraction... tell me something to take my mind off of this, please?

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, I could tell you some ridiculous rumors from the other side, you could tell me how wonderful that church picnic was... Hee hee. I could kiss you, but that would have to be one hell of a long makeout session. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): As much as I would enjoy the kissing, I think you should tell me some silly rumors...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let's see... Oh! There's a good one about Captain Rackham, the gentleman who warned us about the Guard last night. He has two reputedly beautiful women, Annie and Marie, crewing with him. According to "certain sources"... They share a mad, passionate three way relationship that began after Jack made a deal with a demon to be a better pirate. In some versions, Annie herself is the demon! The truth of the matter is that Jack was a crap pirate, and was extraordinarily fortunate to get crew like Annie and Marie.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, the rumor mill, you've gotta love it, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): I know. It's a scream! Annie and Marie are also not in a relationship with Jack. They much prefer each other's company. They're also not all that lovely. I believe it's why poor Captain Rackham was so intrigued by takes of you and dear sister.

Poppy (to Vincent): Yes, because loading & unloading boxes is such glamorous work. I wonder why the ladies stay with Rackham if he's such crap?

Vincent (to Poppy): For all his faults, he's trustworthy. He didn't have to alert us to the Guard returning to Charred Cross last night. And in this business, someone you can trust is often more valuable than raw talent. That and finding people whose company you can tolerate. It can be a challenge being crammed onto a ship for lengthy periods.

Poppy (to Vincent): Makes sense, honey. Tell me another one... I should be the next patient, so not much longer.

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, speaking of people who can barely stand to be on a ship together... Did you ever hear the rumor about "the Dandy" having a torrid one-night affair with one of the crown princes? Ripper borrowed that one for "Gears, Gadgets, & Glory," much to his unending chagrin.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, I read the book but I didn't realize it had come from a circulating rumor. Was it about you & Alistair?

Vincent (to Poppy): The prince is unknown. Popular speculation is that it's Prince Albert, because he's a little swishy. The truth of the matter is that I started the rumor in order to annoy Alistair after we had our falling out. He was always more than a little mortified about how we met. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I bet he was... Oh, it looks like it's my turn to see the doctor. Thank you for the stories, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): See you in a few, hun.

An hour or so later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, all set. Pretty stitches in place, prescriptions given... Oh, and Dr. Addison wanted to talk to you.

Vincent (to Poppy): Uh oh. I'm in trouble.

Poppy (to Vincent): She said something about you only coming to visit her when you're hurt... so, yes, you might be in trouble. :-P

Ten minutes later:

Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo. Did I just get an earful! I am expressly forbidden from coming to see her as a patient until she gets a proper visit. I was also reprimanded for not taking better care of myself, giving you home stitches, and not scheduling proper check-ups.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I know what someone is doing sometime soon. :-P

Vincent (to Poppy): Good gracious I should say so!

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, better you than me, honey... She did seem really nice, so thank you for bringing me here. Shall we go?

Vincent (to Poppy): Yes! Quickly! Before she remembers something else to be angry with me about! Dr. Addison is a peach, even if she can be a bit no nonsense. Hee hee.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you really do make friends wherever you go, don't you? :-P

Vincent (to Poppy): I am good at charming people. It's the only reason I still work at Drac's, because, let's face it, I'm a DREADFUL bartender.

Poppy (to Vincent): Yes it's quite obvious that your talents clearly lie elsewhere, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Good heavens, you don't have to tell me. However, I'll have you know that I have been practicing.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh... well, that's good, honey... Saved by the bell. I've got a phone call. Just a second, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Why is that the reaction everyone has when I mention mixing drinks? :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, that was an awkward phone call... So, what were we talking about?

Vincent (to Poppy): Is everything OK, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, everything is fine. It was Gavin from work. He's the magician I helped out as assistant last week... He was asking me if I'd like to get coffee sometime & talk about the possibility of me being his assistant full time. Apparently, he & Daisy broke up... She was his former assistant.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ah! Am I correct in assuming the position of "assistant" comes with a romance clause?

Poppy (to Vincent): Apparently... I told him that I was so incredibly flattered, but that I was going to have to decline. He seemed a bit shocked that I said no. I don't think that happens to him often. I mean, he is gorgeous but so egotistical. I'm surprised Daisy put up with him for as long as she did.

Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't blame you for not wanting to work with him even at the least. I hope it doesn't make work awkward for you.

Poppy (to Vincent): It shouldn't, honey. All the girls warned me about him when I started working there. He's only interested because I'm new. Besides, he looks at himself in the mirror a little too much for my taste. If I'm going to be with someone, I'd like them to look at me once in awhile & not treat me like an accessory.

Vincent (to Poppy): I can't blame you one bit, hun. Oh! Speaking of jobs, I owe you and the Gloomies your share of the money we make last night.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, that is music to my ears, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. If you'd rather have it in funds that you can use in Britannia, let me know. But, I thought you had more need of it here.

Poppy (to Vincent): No, this is perfect. If I were to put it into anything back home, Percy might get a hold of it for his own sordid use. And, I earned it fair & square.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Very true, hun. Don't worry, the next trip should be a little more lucrative. This was just an easy peasy run.

Poppy (to Vincent): So, honey, I know you're dying to ask about the picnic, so go ahead ask me anything.

Vincent (to Poppy): I AM curious, I have to admit. Hee. I'm also slightly terrified to ask, if you want to know the truth. Was it dreadful?

Poppy (to Vincent): No, the picnic was like a normal picnic, except with a few differences. Prayers before we ate, bible readings, a few people were abstaining from drinking alcohol & just had lemonade or ice tea. Most of the folks were nice enough if a little culty. Your father was very charming, he went around to all of the new members and said hello... there were a few he lingered with more than others... he held their hand a little too long when he shook them. Your mother was like a Queen Bee flitting around basking in the fact that she was the belle of the ball, so to speak. She loves that fact that your father is so respected by the church & its members... She's the one that's going to hate being knocked down a few pegs.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hmmm. That's quite an astute observation, hun. Believe me, she's going to be the one who gets nasty.

Poppy (to Vincent): I purposely said a scathing remark about a lady's dress within earshot of her & she came over to join in and then next thing I knew she's inviting me to tea. She reminds me of Lady Macbeth.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. OH! Hee hee hee. That is perhaps the most accurate description of my mother I've ever heard. She seems caring and outgoing when she's in public. Privately, she was always rather cold, I suppose. At least towards me. Of course, that could be because I was a divine embarrassment. She was not thrilled with her small, effeminate youngest son.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I don't doubt it. You probably served to remind her that she married a gay man... I mean, your parents do not like each other in the slightest. They performed an avoidance ballet the likes of which I've never seen before. They were always in each other's peripheral vision, but never close to each other the whole time. Even when they were saying goodbye to folks, there was a gap of, at least, two feet between them. I get the impression that your father is doing all of this stuff to make her happy & he thinks he deserves to suffer for the sins he's committed or would like to commit. I'd feel bad for him, if he wasn't such a super duper asshole with an extra helping of douchebag. Pardon my French, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): No offense taken, hun. My dad is... Well, he's complicated. He was equal parts loving, and terrifying. He'd be hitting at me or screaming Bible verses at me one week. And then take me to dinner or bragging to his friends about how good I was in a school play the next. The constant drinking didn't help matter, of course. I never knew if he was going to be angry, or loving.

Poppy (to Vincent): I understand, honey. My father drank a lot after the death of my mother. I don't think he ever recovered from it... Somedays he'd be all rainbows & kittens and then others, yelling at me about what a burden I was & she should have lived. Boy, that got dark fast... now I think we both need a drink.

Vincent (to Poppy): I'm sorry, hun. I know how awful that is to hear. And a drink would be wonderful!

Poppy (to Vincent): So, let's talk about something else unless you have any questions about the picnic...

Vincent (to Poppy): I probably will later, sweetie. But for right now, I think I've heard enough. Too many bad memories, I'm afraid.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, at least, we both have the opportunity to make some good memories, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): This couldn't be more true. I'm a very lucky lad. For all the rocky beginnings, I have a wonderful life now.

Poppy (to Vincent): Here's your drink, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Thanks, hun. Here's to leaving shitty times behind, and moving forward to bigger and better things!

Poppy (to Vincent): I'll drink to that!

An hour or so later:

Mouse: Took a nap on the couch, woke up covered in cats... I think I may have to move and find a new place to live.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. That sounds adorable, sweetie! The bitty kitties aren't old enough to walk around yet, are they?

Mouse (to Vincent): No, I think someone piled them on me... I'm not sure who, but I have my suspicions.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I didn't think Gloomy Gus had it in him. Oooo! I hope he took a picture.

Mouse (to Vincent): Yeah, yeah. Don't encourage him... I'm the one who's going to suffer if he gets himself a sense of humor. :-P

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I don't know how worried you should be about that, honestly. :-P Oh, oh, OH! I totes have money for you and Mr. Von Gloomenburg!

Mouse (to Vincent): Really? That's great. Do you want to bring it over here or should I come to you?

Vincent (to Mouse): Ummm. You should come here. Yes. You should definitely come here. We may have been drinking. And by "may have been drinking," I mean we are totes sloshed.

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh? I can hold off until tomorrow, I'm in no hurry to get it just yet. Is everything alright?

Vincent (to Mouse): What? A man can't get tipsy in the middle of the day on a Monday... Oh wow. That sounds WAY worse than I thought it would. We're fine. Poppy was telling me about her fun time at the ol' homestead... Oh. Wait. I guess it's NOT the ol' homestead, is it? The picnic! She was telling me about the picnic, and that got us to talking about our parents and that got us to drinking. Now we're watching cartoons and drinking adult beverages with silly straws. Hee hee.

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, well that definitely sounds like a good day so far. Why don't you stop talking to your sister & spend some quality time with the young lady sitting with you? Or would that be a comment you're going to choose to ignore? :-P

Vincent (to Mouse): Ooo, woman! Aren't you a snarky one today? Tell that stud of yours to put you in a better mood. And for YOUR INFO, I have been spending quality time with Poppy. All day. She's probably sick to death of me by now. So there!

Mouse (to Vincent): HAHAHA! Yes, I am feeling properly shunned, little brother. And, I have a feeling that if Poppy didn't want to spend time with you, I don't think she would.

Vincent (to Mouse): But if you insist on being ignored. Ignore you I shall. Can you feel it? Can you feel the ignoring taking place right now?

Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth have you been drinking? It's been quite awhile since you've been this drunkenly silly.

Vincent (to Mouse): Eh? What's that? I seem to hear something as if someone were speaking to me from a very, very long way away. Almost as if someone I was ignoring were trying to communicate... Hee hee. I'm just kidding. You know I love you. I have NO IDEA what I'm drinking. Poppy has been the bartender because I suck at it. I do seem to be rather on the goofy side. Maybe it's the straw. Ohhhh... Oh. OH! Or she used that rum I got from Captain Birdie. Oh dear.

Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth is a Captain Birdie? (to Poppy) What on earth did you give Vincent to drink? He's been pretty goofy.

Poppy (to Mouse): It's just a Rum Cooler, but we've been drinking it out of silly straws... Have you ever watched a cartoon called Jem?

Mouse (to Poppy): Yes, when I was a kid... Is that what you're watching? You guys are drunker than I thought.

Poppy (to Mouse): Heehee, it's truly outrageous... Oh, now I get the name of the burlesque performer...

Vincent (to Mouse): Captain Birdie is a who, not a what. He gave me a bottle of his "special" home-brewed rum as a thank you. I've never actually consumed it. I was using it as a degreaser... (to Poppy) Hun, did this rum come out of a corked brown bottle? It had a label with a bird on it?

Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): God, are you two going to need a chaperone?

Poppy (to Vincent): No, honey, it came from a bottle with a squid looking thing... probably a squid.

Vincent (to Mouse): You just want to come over here and drink my hooch. I've intrigued you with my talk of paint-peeling pirate rum. (to Poppy) Ah ha! So that explains... absolutely nothing. I had squid rum? That's amazing!

Mouse (to Vincent): No, if I wanted to drink rum, I'd do it here...

Poppy (to Vincent): Does it, honey? That's wonderful.

Vincent (to Mouse): But is it PIRATE rum? Could it potentially blind you? No! My rum contains adventure! PIRATE ADVENTURE. You can't resist. You can't resist the allure of possibly fatal pirate adventure rum. You know you can't. Are you, Mouse? Are scared of pirate adventure rum?

Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, do you actually want me to come over and drink your potentially blinding alcohol? I mean, one of us should keep our eyesight... Who will be left to steer the ship?

Vincent (to Poppy): I think my sister is scared of my pirate adventure rum. (to Mouse) Pffft! We let Otto steer the ship. It's probably only a matter of time before he mutinies and takes over the business anyway. Did you realize he went with us the other night? Hee hee. He was super stealthy about it, but he was still there?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh well, she's missing out on adventure...

Mouse (to Vincent): Yes, I saw him when I went to help Poppy in the hold. We pretended not to see him. I'm sure he was torn between staying at home with his children & protecting me.

Vincent (to Mouse): He's a fur-covered sweetheart despite his foul disposition. Oh my GOD. He's like a cat version of Eep! Ha ha ha! Oh sweet Jesus!

Mouse (to Vincent): Oh god, and he smokes all the time, too... he is a cat version of Eep.

Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee hee! Oh. Oh God... Well, as long as he doesn't start painting, I think you're alright, sweetie.

Mouse (to Vincent): Speaking of my mister, I should start actually making the dinner, he'll be home shortly.

Vincent (to Mouse): OK. Talk to you later, sweet sister. Enjoy your night. And remember, if it's too boring: pirate adventure rum!

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, why are you wearing those pirate boots? When did you put those on? Are we playing dress up?

Vincent (to Poppy): These are my pirate adventure rum drinkin' boots. This is the only acceptable footwear for pirate adventure rum.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I feel completely under-dressed now, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hun, you ALWAYS look fabulous. You know this is fact.

Poppy (to Vincent): You're sweet! I'm going to rummage in your closet, honey...

Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Go ahead, hun. Godspeed! I've got more than a few inexplicable things in there.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I should say so... What on earth is this?

Vincent (to Poppy): Is it the matador ensemble? I STILL don't know where that came from? Oh that? Oh dear Lord... THAT would be from my "bedazzled sweater" collection. I believe those are supposed to be kittens. If you think that's scary, you haven't found the silk cowboy shirts in the back.

Poppy (to Vincent): That is truly terrifying, honey... Oooooh, I found something that I'm putting on right now... If I'm not mistaken it's the evil princess dress from Legend... Now all I need is to kill a unicorn. :-P I think I'm going to wear this dress all the time... You have cowboy shirts? I have got to see them... this closet is huge.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh... Oh my. I will certainly not complain if you do, hun. You look... Wow. And yes. That closet is ridiculous. It's one of the reasons I took this apartment. Cowboy shirts should be towards the back.

Poppy (to Vincent): OH MY GOD! These are hideously awesome! ... Alright, I'm done... I need more rum. Honey, are you okay? If your eyes get any wider, they might fall out of your head.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, good heavens! I'm sorry, hun. I was staring. That is certainly embarrassing. You cut quite an impressive figure in that dress, and usually I have a bit more tact than that. Hee hee.

Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey, I'll forgive you this time since you're drink, I mean, drunk. heehee.

Vincent (to Poppy): At least I'm not drunk alone. Speaking of which... My silly straw is dry. I think we should rectify this and watch more Jem.

Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, you are so smart! That sounds brilliant.

Vincent (to Poppy): I'm not about to contradict a beautiful woman in a pretty dress. What I'm going to do is pour her another drink.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I have to admit, honey, I could get used to this kind of treatment... I may have to keep this dress. :-P

Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! If you want it, hun, it's yours.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, I may need some black lipstick & hair gel... I'll be right back. There, honey, now the costume is complete... heehee. I hear a throat begging to be cut! I will have to wear this to Drac's sometimes.

Vincent (to Poppy): I haven't worn it since the Halloween Delia and I did gender-bent Legend costumes at Drac's. Damn did we make a TON of tips. I guarantee you will not pay for a single drink all night.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I doubt I could be that lucky, honey. What did you make this time, it tastes different?

Vincent (to Poppy): I don't doubt it. This DOES taste odd, doesn't it? Oh shit! Spit it out, hun! I wasn't paying attention when I poured and it's got Captain Birdie's rum in it.

Poppy (to Vincent): Good god, honey, that tastes like the rotgut my brothers used to make in our backyard.

Vincent (to Poppy): It's probably the same recipe. Captain James Birdie isn't known for his refined tastes. Ugh! We're lucky we can still see. Let me get us something a bit more palpable.

Poppy (to Vincent): Are you hungry, honey? I'm feeling a little peckish.

Vincent (to Poppy): Mmm. I probably SHOULD eat. I think I've hit the amount of alcohol my frame can handle without food. Ooo! Do you want to catch the bus into town, go to dinner dressed like this, and scare the shit out of the straights?

Poppy (to Vincent): But, of course, honey! That's always so much fun.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let me go pirate myself up a little bit more then. I think I need a sash and shirt with FAR more ruffles.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh yes... I need to put on some shoes. Can we go get sushi?

Vincent (to Poppy): Sushi would be PERFECT. Let me know when you're properly shod, and we'll be off. Do you need something warm to throw over that dress, hun? I think I have the perfect accessory.

Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, I didn't have any proper shoes to go with it, so I went with boots. Really? This collar makes coats a wee bit difficult.

Vincent (to Poppy): Boots are always appropriate. And with a dress like that, you skip the jacket all together and go for a cloak. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, that is lovely... And, you look magnificent. Just like Errol Flynn in The Sea Hawk. If I wasn't starving... Well, you can probably guess what I'd like to do.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh my. I can take several guesses and I like the way all of them end. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, if we hurry back, maybe, we can end the evening that way? ;-)

Vincent (to Poppy): Well, my goodness. Are you trying to seduce me, Miss Poppy?

Poppy (to Vincent): I certainly hope so... Is it working?

Vincent (to Poppy): In spades. Hee hee. You don't really go much for innuendo, do you?

Poppy (to Vincent): Why bother with innuendo, honey, when straight talk works so much better?

Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't argue with that, hun.

Mouse (to Eep): Hey there mister man! How was work?

Eep (to Mouse): Pretty good, actually. I didn't get into a single argument all day. Personal record. How's your day been?

Mouse (to Eep): Good & quiet...Well, except for the waking up from my nap with all the cats on me. You wouldn't happen to know how that happened?

Eep (to Mouse): ALL the cats were on you? Huh. Wow. That's weird.

Mouse (to Eep): Really? Am I supposed to believe that you didn't do it?

Eep (to Mouse): Um... Yes?

Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, you didn't take a photo, did you?

Eep (to Mouse): Shit! No. I didn't think of it. Damn. Oh, I mean, uhhh... I don't know what you're talking about.

Mouse (to Eep): Oh good... I'm glad you don't know anything about it... Food's ready. I, uh, tried my hand at empanadas. I hope they turned out okay.

Eep (to Mouse): You did what? Wow. I'm... Wow. Heh. I'm surprised you wanted to try them with as often as I chased you outta the kitchen.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, it WAS a lot easier without you smacking my hand. You can be brutally honest about them, I'd like your opinion.

Eep (to Mouse): Wow... You went a little lighter on the seasoning in the meat than I would have, but the crust... What did you do to the crust? It... Holy shit. It tastes just like the way my mom used to make them. What did you do differently?

Mouse (to Eep): I used a combination of butter & shortening for the crust. I thought it might give it a better taste & I figured traditional recipes wouldn't use shortening.

Eep (to Mouse): Huh. Wow. I'm knocked on my ass here. These are delicious.

Mouse (to Eep): You really like them? I was nervous about making them. I won't step on your toes, as I know you like to make them. But, I just wanted to see if I could.

Eep (to Mouse): No! No. It's not that. I'm probably making a weird ass face, huh?

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, a little.

Eep (to Mouse): I like them! It's just, uh, heh... No one has made empanadas for me in a really long time, is all. It's dumb, but it was a big deal when my mom made them when I was little. That's all. Sorry. These are really good.

Mouse (to Eep): Oh... it's not dumb. I just wanted to make them for you. I didn't think about your mom. I'm sorry.

Eep (to Mouse): That wasn't a complaint, you know. This is amazing. Thank you. It's nice. Really nice. It's... Heh. It's not something I can explain without feeling like a huge dickhead. So, thanks. I love you, you empanada making gringa.

Mouse (to Eep): I love you too, you foul mouthed grumpy ass.

A couple hours later:

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you'd think I looked scary the way all of the other bus patrons have taken up sitting as far away as possible.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I'm assuming it's because they're afraid they won't be able to contain their lust for you. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, someone just pinched my butt... I hope it was you, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): It wasn't me, hun. And, I'm guessing you weren't the one who goosed me either. Good heavens.

Poppy (to Vincent): Who knew that riding on the bus was such an adventure? I'm glad we have rum back at the house.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I always have good ideas with you, hun. Oh my... I think perhaps having a saké at the restaurant was a bad idea.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you're drunk again, honey... Or wait, is it still?

Vincent (to Poppy): I don't think I ever regained soberness. Is soberness a word? Soberness is a word now! SOBERNESS IS TOTES NOW A WORD.

Poppy (to Vincent): So, what you're saying is now would be a great time to ask you questions... of which I cannot think of any to ask. Damn. This dress was much easier to maneuver in before. heehee. And it was way easier to get in then getting out seems to be… I think it's a trap. I'm going to be like one of those cartoon characters forever stuck in the same clothes...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, if you're looking to get out of that dress, hun, I'm more than willing to help you. Out of the goodness of my heart, of course.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh that would be helpful, honey... don't peek.

Vincent (to Poppy): I will be a perfect gentleman. Until you ask me not to be. Hee hee hee.

Poppy (to Vincent): I wouldn't go that far, honey... I like scoundrels.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You must like me because I'm a scoundrel. There aren't enough scoundrels in your life...

Poppy (to Vincent): I happen to like nice men.

Vincent (to Poppy): I'm nice...

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee… Did it just get really warm in here?

Vincent (to Poppy): Whew. More than a bit. Do you want something else to drink? I think I should probably get some water in me at this point.

Poppy (to Vincent): Water would be good with lots of ice.

Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. How are you feeling?

Poppy (to Vincent): I'm feeling alright. Heehee, I think the waiter gave you his phone number on the receipt for the sushi, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): He did? Well. So, he did. What's this little drawing he added at the bottom? Oh good heavens! THAT'S explicit. Well, now I know WHY he gave me his phone number. Oh my... Hee hee.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh my... I wonder if that's an offer? heehee. You should call him, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. That's alright, hun. I think I'd rather date someone who asked me out in person rather than draws dirty pictures on receipts.

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee. Really, honey?

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh good heavens, no. I've already done the horrible, shameful hookup thing. I'd rather avoid making THAT mistake again. Heh. Especially right now with all this bullshit that's going on with my parents.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, then I guess I shouldn't give you this silly doodle I was drawing, then. :-P

Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! No. No, I'm afraid I can't accept this. You'll have to ask me to do that in person like a civilized person. :-P

Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I'm not even sure what it's called, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Let me take a better look at that. Oh. I'm not sure what that's called either. Good heavens. Is that position even possible?

Poppy (to Vincent): I saw it in a book once.

Vincent (to Poppy): Clearly, it made an impression. I don't know that we could do that without pulling out your stitches.

Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey. I was just teasing, anyway... I was just inspired by the receipt graffiti.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, you can't blame a lad for being hopeful.

Poppy (to Vincent): What pray tell are you hopeful about, honey? I think I've made it perfectly clear that all you have to do is ask.

Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. Yes, you have, hun. I...uh. Good heavens. When did I get this awkward?

Poppy (to Vincent): I don't know... You seemed much more confident & smooth when you thought I was PoppyBot.

Vincent (to Poppy): Sorry, hun. In a way, after I found out she was an automaton, things were a bit less complicated with PoppyBot. I like you quite a bit more, so I guess I'm a bit more nervous... Oh good heavens! I am CLEARLY too drunk to speak.

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, heehee, you don't have to be nervous, honey. I like it when you speak your mind. Besides, I like you quite a bit, too...

Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I guess you do like scoundrels, after all. So... Um, would you like to join me in the bedroom, hun?

Poppy (to Vincent): I thought you'd never ask, honey.