Vincent (to Ripper): Hee hee. Good morning, Professor. She's not quite up and about yet. Come on in. Would you like some coffee or tea? Heaven knows I need at least a pot and a half of coffee. The little one here was up and hungry bright and early this morn.
Ripper (to Vincent): Oh, tea would be great, actually. (to Victor) Hey there, little man, you giving your dad a hard time?
Vincent (to Ripper): More like his sleep schedule is giving me a hard time. He's pretty good from what I've read, but getting up every two hours? I do NOT recommend it. Ugh... Oh! The kettle! That was fast. Here. You, baby. Me, tea.
Ripper (to Vincent): Oh. (to Victor) Hey there, Victor, you are a very tiny child... Not really surprising, though. (to Vincent) So, ummm, is Poppy still mad at me?
Vincent (to Ripper): Heh. Don't be fooled, he grows up to be taller than both of us. I mean, he LOOKS like he's going to be taller than both of us. Oh hell... I just spilled hot water all over. Poppy's still pretty steamed, Professor. Though not quite as livid as she was. Some pretty delicate politics were upset by that little fiasco, and we're still trying to work out how to set it right.
Ripper (to Vincent): I know I totally fucked up & I feel awful about it. I'll do whatever I can to fix things, I promise. Do you need help with that mess? Oh... I can't really do much with baby in arms.
Vincent (to Ripper): Heh. No, no. It's alright. I'm a klutz when I'm this tired. I've got it. It's just a little water. Y'all stay put. Here you go, Professor. Give me the little monster, and I'll go get my wife. Repeat that part about you being very, very sorry and willing to make amends to her. Heh. Ad naseum if you have to. (to Poppy) Hun? Jacob's here to see you. He wants to apologize.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh? Does he look sufficiently apologetic, honey?
Vincent (to Poppy): He looks downright repentant, lover. I don't think I've ever seen the Professor so sheepish. He knows he stepped in it, and is keen to help sort things out if he can.
Poppy (to Vincent): Good... Let me throw on something and I'll be right out, honey. Though, I'm half-tempted to let him stew for a bit longer. But, I know that would be petty & cruel of me.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I think he's stewed more than enough, hun. (to Ripper) She'll be right out, Professor. And don't worry. She's not armed. At least, I don't think she's armed...
Ripper (to Vincent): Okay, thanks. Do you think it would be better if I hold Victor?
Vincent (to Ripper): You're not using MY son as a meat shield, sir! Hee hee. Don't make that face. I'm only kidding.
Ripper (to Vincent): Heh... You caught me. I was totally thinking she wouldn't kill me if I was holding him. :-P Hand me the poop factory. Hello, Little Man! Were you good for the Professor? Did you drool all over him? I think you did!
Poppy (to Ripper & Vincent): Oh my... Professor, you look like you're awaiting execution.
Vincent (to Poppy): I keep telling him you won't murder him, hun. Not in our home. You'll probably just maim him a little.
Ripper (to Vincent): Not helping, Captain. (to Poppy) I kinda feel that way. Look, I'm really sorry. I should have listened to you & I know I really fucked up. I'll do whatever I can to fix things. Just say the word. And, I swear I will listen to you next time. The people we're trying to help shouldn't suffer because I'm a dumbass.
Poppy (to Ripper): Hmmm... You're right, you were being a dumbass & you will listen to me next time or else I WILL shoot you. And, I am not joking, honey. If I had shot you in the Tombs it would have solved all my problems quite quickly & wouldn't have left me in this pickle. So, bear that in mind.
Vincent (to Ripper): She will too. I've seen her do it. Hell, she shot me that one time... (to Poppy & Ripper) Oops. Right. Shutting up, lover.
Ripper (to Vincent & Poppy): I understand...
Poppy (to Ripper): Now, say you'll never do it again.
Ripper (to Poppy): I will never do it again.
Poppy (to Ripper): Now, give me a hug.
Ripper (to Poppy): Oh... okay.
Poppy (to Ripper): Now, give Vincent a hug.
Ripper (to Poppy): Uh, why?
Poppy (to Ripper): Heehee, I just wanted to see if you'd do it, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Heh. He doesn't want to make it weird, hun.
Poppy (to Vincent & Ripper): Well, that's just not fair. I heard about you two flirting with each other from Wanda. You can't blame me for being curious.
Ripper (to Vincent): Your wife is a bit evil... Did you know that? :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Who said I was blaming you? (to Ripper) I'm acutely aware. Why do you think I like her so much? :-p
Ripper (to Vincent & Poppy): So, am I properly chastised or do you have some humiliating tasks for me to perform?
Poppy (to Ripper & Vincent): Well, unless you're willing to make out with my husband for my own amusement... I think we're done here… Don't look at me like that! I'm just teasing.
Vincent (to Poppy & Ripper): Ha ha ha! Oh good heavens! The looks on our faces must have been amazing! Hee hee. (to Victor) Did you see that, little man? Your mother just tried to give me a heart attack.
Poppy (to Vincent): It made me wish for a camera, honey.
Ripper (to Poppy & Vincent): And, on that note... I'm going to go.
Poppy (to Ripper): Alright, honey, but I will be getting up with you about fixing this mistake in the next few days. So, be prepared.
Ripper (to Poppy & Vincent): Okay. I will. I'll see you both later. (to Victor) Bye, little man.
Vincent (to Ripper): See you later, Professor! (to Poppy) And, I thought he looked panicked when you told him to hug me.
Poppy (to Vincent): It's simply because he still wants to get in your pants, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): It's just some leftover, unresolved tension... Heh. Which has as much to do with him turning me down as it does the hotness of my pants, I think.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, your pants are the hotness, lover.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, I can't argue with that.
Poppy (to Vincent): So, I have a strange question for you, honey… I've been thinking about that kissing thing at the club the other night & well, I was wondering if you have any regrets about ending up with a girl? I mean, I know you love me & Victor. But, clearly there's a part of you that likes boys.
Vincent (to Poppy): I don't have any regrets about ending up with YOU, lover. To be fair, if I had ended up with a lad instead of a lass... He could ask me if I had any regrets about not ending up with a girl. :-p
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, that's true. I just figured I should ask. I mean, we're not technically married on this side, so I still want to give you the option to change your mind. Because once we're married over here, you're stuck but good. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I'm already stuck but good, hun. If I had any doubts, I wouldn't have married you at all, here or in Britannia. Where is all this coming from, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, the kiss thing, Jacob being all awkward around you, looking through wedding stuff...Just needlessly worrying, I suppose.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'll say! Come here, gorgeous. I love you, Poppy. I knew what I was getting into when I asked you to marry me.
Poppy (to Vincent): I love you too, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): I have no desire to go out and sow my wild oats with anyone else, male or female.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heh, that's good, I don't either. It just seems funny to think that if Percy hadn't been shot I might never have met you... I'd probably still be in stasis, sleeping and you'd be the King of Pervs.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Heaven forbid! It's alright. Lulu is working at Drac's now, and picking up the perv slack.
Poppy (to Vincent): I bet she picks up all sorts of things, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee hee. Oh dear. You do not like Lulu at all, do you?
Poppy (to Vincent): I haven't had enough interactions to actively dislike her, honey. There was just something about her that rubbed me the wrong way.
Several hours later:
Lulu (to Eep): Oh Eep! I didn't know you worked here. Do you have any change? I couldn't get over to the bank before it closed. I've got someone who wants to buy our leatherbound copy of "To Stir the Mystic Cauldron" by Willow ThreeFeathers and I only have a bunch of ones.
Eep (to Lulu): I dunno. Lemme check. Josh only takes cash transactions so we might. What do you need?
Lulu (to Eep): Some fives & tens would be great... So, you're an anarchist, huh? I didn't really take you for that, I always thought you were more like a nihilist or even, an existentialist & didn't go into useless and outmoded political systems.
Eep (to Lulu): Uh... Yeah, no. I'm not an anarchist. All that socialist, communist, power to the people shit is bunk. Shockingly, south Americans aren't overly enamored of Che, and I'm not really one for philosophers. I can give you about 20 bucks worth of fives and a couple of tens. That work?
Lulu (to Eep): Oh yeah, that should work. Thanks! You should check out Kant's take on anarchy, it'll give you a few good points for arguing with indignant trustypunks who want to talk your ear off about creating perfect civil states.
Eep (to Lulu): Here you go. There's no talking sense to trustifarians. I just call them over-privileged assholes and hand them a history book. And that book is called, "To Stir the Mystic Cauldron"? Seriously? Jesus.
Lulu (to Eep): Yeah, it's like $200... It's a ripoff.
Eep (to Lulu): Fat Christ! Well, there's no talking sense to some people.
Lulu (to Eep): Heehee... I should get back. Thanks again!
A short time later:
Wanda (to Eep): Eduardo! I was wondering if you were working tonight! Oh my various gods. Look at this place! You weren't kidding. Oh god... My parents had that pamphlet. And that one too! Dude. I'm seriously having flashbacks.
Eep (to Wanda): Hi, Wanda. What's the fuck are you doing here?
Wanda (to Eep): I was picking up a book from the new age shop down the street. The clerk there is mondo cute. You should go check her out.
Eep (to Wanda): No. First, I'm married. Second, it's Lulu. Third, fuck no.
Wanda (to Eep): Ohhhh. Lulu... Tell me more of this Lulu. Where do you know her from?
Eep (to Wanda): I work with her at Drac's. She's the new bartender. Why aren't I fucking surprised that you like her?
Wanda (to Eep): Because I have awesome taste. Dude! What is with the crew down at your club? Does your boss just hire hot people or what? Well, except for you. :-P
Eep (to Wanda): Ha. ha. You done riding my ass now? I've gotta close up.
Wanda (to Eep): Hee hee hee. You know I'm just teasing you. Gimme a hug. Remember: our place. Dinner. You and Mouse owe us.
Eep (to Wanda): Yeah. Yeah. Later.
An hour or so later:
Eep (to Mouse): Hey, pretty lady. How was you... uh oh. What's wrong?
Mouse (to Eep): Huh? Oh... sorry. I was just listening to Lulu's mix.
Eep (to Mouse): Is that a good scowl or a bad scowl?
Mouse (to Eep): Heh. It's a good scowl. I wanted to hate it. I still need to see her spin live in front of a crowd before I'm convinced completely. But it's actually really good. I've been listening to it for the last two hours waiting to find something to hate about it. And, I keep finding myself tapping my foot.
Eep (to Mouse): You're mad because you're enjoying it. Heh. Makes sense, actually. Lulu came into my work looking for change today.
Mouse (to Eep): Oh... So, do you need a beer & a smoke after that?
Eep (to Mouse): She yammered at me about anarchism and nihilism and some crap and then told me to read some German philosopher. You haven't heard the worst part. Looks like she works at that pagan store down the street. Wanda was in there buying a book... so of course, when she comes in to bug me, she has to tell me how cute the girl in the bookstore is. I may need a case of beer.
Mouse (to Eep): God... I'm sorry. You may need something stronger than beer. I think we've got some rum or gin.
Eep (to Mouse): Heh. Yeah. I think I do. How was your day other than trying to hate the Lulu mix.
Mouse (to Eep): Good. A bit weird. Sasha called me into a meeting to discuss a few things.
Eep (to Mouse): Oh yeah? Is he trying to get you to spin more nights again?
Mouse (to Eep): No... Apparently, he wants to find a partner in the club, he'd like to be able to spend some more time with his family. And, wanted to know if I knew anyone that might be interested. I've worked there for years and I didn't even know he had a family... He never talks about himself & he's just always been at the club. It's weird to think that he might not be there all of the time... or that we have a new boss.
Eep (to Mouse): Wow. Yeah. Heh. He kinda lives there, doesn't he? Christ. I hope whoever he partners with won't be too fucking horrible.
Mouse (to Eep): Well, he admitted to me that one of the reasons why he kept his sister spinning there, was because she had invested some money in club when he first opened & he felt like he owed it to her. So, having dealt with her for as long as we did, I'm not sure how someone could be worse than that... Nah, I take that back. I'm sure someone could be worse.
Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. You've totally just cursed us. It'll be like, Vincent's dad's church or something that invests now.
Mouse (to Eep): Oops... Me and my big mouth. Heh. I should just become his new partner & save us all... Just kidding.
Eep (to Mouse): He was probably hoping that's what you'd say.
Mouse (to Eep): Well, he's got another think coming if he thinks I'd want to do that because... I uh, have... other things to do. Boy, that sounded much better in my head.
Eep (to Mouse): Heh heh. Here. Have a gin drink. You, uh, you might need it. Wanda is getting insistent over this dinner. We're probably gonna have do that soon.
Mouse (to Eep): Damn. I thought I had satisfied her bloodlust with the post-wedding reception planning.
Eep (to Mouse): No. She's insisting we come over. God, I hope she doesn't try to cook...
Mouse (to Eep): Well, I guess we should get it over with. How about this week?
Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Might as well. It's been a good life. Might as well end it on a high note. Maybe we can sneak in edible food. Or booze. Or both. Heh. Whoa… I think I made this drink too strong. How's yours?
Mouse (to Eep): Pretty hefty... Heh. Remind to never let you bartend. :-P
Eep (to Mouse): Yeah, why do you think they've been keeping me at the door? That, and I'm not exactly a prime "customer service" person. Heh. Apparently, people were too intimidated to come up to me and ask for for shit when I worked as the barback.
Mouse (to Eep): Awww, That is both the funniest & saddest thing I've ever heard. How could anyone be scared of that face? :-p Yep, clearly this drink is strong. I think I need to go curl up on the couch or bed.
Eep (to Mouse): Wherever you're headed, I'm coming too. I vote for the bed. There's more room.
