Mouse (to Nathaniel): Hey Nate, you seem in an awfully good mood. Date went well, I take it?
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Um, heh. Yeah. I put on a shirt with a collar and everything.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): I bet you looked very nice. I'm glad you had a good time. You deserve it... Will you go see what is going on in the back? I'm worried that Lisabeth is throwing things at River... again. I don't know what the hell has gotten into that girl.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Oh. Um, thanks. Yeah. I'll go check it out.
A moment later, in the kitchen:
Nathaniel (to River & Lisabeth): What the fuck are you two doing back here? Liz, what... Holy shit! What the fuck did you do to her?
River (to Nathaniel): Nate, could you please tell Lisabeth to stop yelling & throwing things at me? She's being a bit psychotic. She's been out to get me since I got back. Will you talk some sense into her? Please? I'm going to have to clean up this fucking mess. Emma is going to kill us.
Nathaniel (to River): Oooookay! Scratch that fucking idea. She brandished a pan at me and told me if I was coming in there to plead for that "pretty boy dickhead's life" I could turn right back around. Which I did. Sorry. That's above & beyond my damn pay grade. Fat Christ! This place is fucking destroyed. I'll get a broom.
River (to Nathaniel): Sorry about that. I really don't know why she's so pissed at me. We've never dated or even, hooked up... Oh god, there was a kiss under the mistletoe at the Christmas party a year ago, but Mars was there... You don't think that's why she's mad at me, do you? It was forever ago.
Nathaniel (to River): Uhhhh, I have no idea, but if she wasn't trying to kill you before you left, and she is trying now? I'd say you blowing town probably has something to do with it.
River (to Nathaniel): Great... Just what I need one more person mad at me about that. My sister read me the riot act when I got back, Mars barely speaks to me and now, Lisabeth seems to want to murder me with cooking implements... You don't have to help. I can get it.
Nathaniel (to River): ... Yeah. Must be awful to have people who worry about you when you disappear. Sucks to be you. I'd rather get this shit cleaned up as quick as possible, alright? One, it's my fucking job, isn't it? Two, I'm gonna have to remake everything in here you two trashed.
River (to Nathaniel): I'll give you a hand. I actually used to help do the baking before I left. If we can get a few trays out in the next hour, Emma hopefully won't kill me.
Nathaniel (to River): Honestly, I'm gonna fucking need a hand. Shit! Y'all just HAD to fucking throw glass too, didn't you?
River (to Nathaniel): It wasn't me. I was way too busy ducking to throw anything.
Nathaniel (to River): I can believe that. Fuck... I'll be right back.
A minute later, in the office:
Nathaniel: Jesus Christ! Why do hands bleed like fucking... I dunno. Something that bleeds a whole fucking lot?
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Oh god, Nate, you're bleeding! Let me grab you a bandage.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): I'm alright. It's not that bad. River and Lisabeth got a little, uh, carried away. I think she may be trying to murder him.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Hmmm... How bad is back there or do I want to know?
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Heh. I think you'd be happier not knowing. Thanks. I think it's alright. I'm gonna help River get everything cleaned up. He said he'd help with the baking, so we shouldn't be too far behind.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Okay, good... I'm going to go have a little chat with Lisabeth & find out why her panties are in such a twist.
A moment later, in the kitchen:
Nathaniel (to River): Alright. What else needs cleaning up?
River (to Nathaniel): I think I got everything swept up while you were taking care of your hand. We just need to get the muffins & tarts made.
Nathaniel (to River): OK. I'll start the tarts. If you wanna start the muffins when you're done there, that'd be a big help.
River (to Nathaniel): Okay... Thanks for helping out with all of this. I'm sorry you got hurt & everything.
Nathaniel (to River): It was an accident. It's not that bad. I've done worse with less.
River (to Nathaniel): I know, but I shouldn't have let it escalate like that... Lisabeth just got my goat & I yelled back at her, so she chucked the first thing she could grab at me. She's got a temper on her.
Nathaniel (to River): Yeah. You could say that. Heh. Still, you're special. I never got anything chucked at me, and I'm a dick.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh. Clearly you haven't tried hard enough.
Nathaniel (to River): Well, today's a banner day then. First time getting injured at work, first time I've been told I'm not a big enough douche. Keep this up & I could be an upstanding member of society by 80. Could you open the fridge for me? I gotta chill the dough.
River (to Nathaniel): Here you go... So, I should apologize for coming on so strong when I first got back. I was just super nervous.
Nathaniel (to River): Uh, yeah. Alright. Don't worry about it.
River (to Nathaniel): Oh, okay.
Nathaniel (to River): Jesus. What do you want me to say here? You want my opinion on you? Are we supposed to be buds now? What?
River (to Nathaniel): No, I don't think we're bros or buddies or anything. I was just trying to be friendly because I don't seem to have a lot of friends right now. And, your opinion of me is kinda obvious.
Nathaniel (to River): Yeah? What's that?
River (to Nathaniel): You think I'm some sort of phony douchebag that would beat you up in an alley.
Nathaniel (to River): Heh. Well, that was my first impression, but I kinda assume the worst of everyone. Look, you seem like an alright guy, OK? But, it also seems like your head is so far up your ass, you're gonna need the jaws of life to get it out. Which isn't a dig. I've got my head up my ass most of the time too.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh. Well, at least you're honest. So I've got my head up my ass, huh? Is there a surgery for that? Or am I a hopeless case?
Nathaniel (to River): Fucked if I know. As soon as I figure out how to be less of a self-centered asshole sometime, I'll let you know. And, yeah, I'm working on being more honest. Mostly cause my fucking aunt is like a short, squeaky Sherlock.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh. I'll try to act less like a self-centered dick. Feel free to call me out on it, if I slip. I promise I won't take offense… So, was that your boyfriend you were here with the other night?
Nathaniel (to River): Heh. Yeah. You say that now. And, um, yeah. That was Aiden, my boyfriend.
River (to Nathaniel): He seemed a little bit of stuffed shirt but nice. Not at all what I would expect you to date, though. I have to be honest, I thought you and Mars were seeing each other, at first... Especially when I saw you two out front smoking & laughing about something. Heh. She's generally so fucking serious about everything.
Nathaniel (to River): Ha ha ha! I figured you thought I might have a thing for Mars. Yeah. There's NO chance of that, even if I wasn't gay. I'd probably remind her too much of her dad. We're just friends. Besides, we're practically fucking related. Are those muffins ready to go into the oven?
River (to Nathaniel): Yeah, got three trays ready to go.
Nathaniel (to River): Awesome. I'm almost finished with the tarts. Once those are done, we're on schedule. Almost.
A short time later:
Nathaniel (to River): Shit! We've got an order for four dozen espresso shortbread cookies I forgot about. Can you start creaming the butter?
River (to Nathaniel): Yep. No problem.
Mouse (to Nathaniel & River): How's it going back here? I hope you don't mind the intrusion but, I've got a tiramisu to make for a customer for tonight.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Nah. We're alright, I think. Muffins and tarts are almost done, and River's got the dough started for the shortie order. I think we're good.
Mouse (to Nathaniel & River): Heh. I'm really impressed. Good job.
Nathaniel (to River & Mouse): Shit. I gotta change this bandage. I'll be back in a second to help.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Okay... (to River) That'll give you & I chance to talk.
River (to Mouse): Oh... about what?
Mouse (to River): About why Lisabeth felt the need to chuck a glass at your head.
River (to Mouse): I was afraid you were going to say that.
Mouse (to River): Yeah, I thought you might... She told me quite a tale which explained a few things about why she wanted to hurt you & why you took off... On a personal level, I really want to fire you but you are a good employee when you don't take off without warning & I did say that I would give you a second chance. And, I don't break my promises... unlike, some people. So, for the time being, I'm just going to schedule you to work on different days than Lisabeth until she cools off.
River (to Mouse): Oh, thanks... I don't mean to sound like an idiot, but why did she want to hurt me?
Mouse (to River): Well, it seems that Lisabeth & my daughter hooked up for a short time after your little wandering act... Judging by the look on your face, this is news to you... Well, it was a bit one-sided, Mars was still hung up on you. Thus, the thrown objects.
River (to Mouse): Oh.
Mouse (to River): Don't worry, I'll be having a nice little chat with my daughter, later. (to Nathaniel) Nate, you can come back in... Nothing's going to get thrown.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Oh. Um, sorry. I was... Fuck it. I didn't wanna get busted up again.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Heh. I don't blame you at all. If you can help River finish with those cookies, afterwards you can clock out.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Yeah. We've got it. Thanks. Should be done in about less than an hour or so.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Great. I just put the Tiramisu in the fridge. Oliver said one of the toilets is clogged up front, so... It's such a glamorous life I lead. (to River) River when you're done there, go home. Lisabeth has dinner stuff to get ready for & I don't want you in the kitchen with her.
River (to Mouse): Okay... Thanks, Emma.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Heh. I hope you won't take offense if I stay here and finish baking rather than battling the toilet.
Mouse (to Nathaniel): Not at all. I was planning on taking care of it myself. (to River & Nathaniel) I'll see you both later.
Nathaniel (to Mouse): Later. (to River) You OK? You look like you got punched in the nuts.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh. That's an apt description... I solved the mystery of Why Lisabeth was chucking things at my head. Actually, Emma did.
Nathaniel (to River): Yikes. And I'm guessing it was an AWESOME thing to realize. Heh. Don't worry. I'm not gonna press you for details.
River (to Nathaniel): YEAH... And, even better when your boss is the mother of the girl you like and hurt with your stupid bullshit. Fuck me. Today has been a shit day.
Nathaniel (to River): Oh. Oh. Um, shit. That fucking sucks. ... How much do you like Mars?
River (to Nathaniel): While I was gone I realized I liked her a lot more than I wanted to admit. But, I totally fucked up any chance with her... And, I don't really blame her.
Nathaniel (to River): Yeah. You fucked up big time, Dean. I ain't gonna even pretend you didn't. But... She's still hung up on you, you know? If you like her, REALLY fucking like her, I'll bet you could make it work. Not that you won't have to work your ASS off. to prove you're worth her time. And, for whatever it's worth, if you fuck her over again, I'll let Victor deal with you. That may not seem like much of a threat, but take it from me, the Potters take folks they consider family fucking seriously.
River (to Nathaniel): Okay, okay... I'll try my best... Who's Dean?
Nathaniel (to River): Ha ha ha! Oh. Heh... Sorry. Sorry! Dean Winchester is a character from an old TV show that's popular with the family.
River (to Nathaniel): I'm not sure, if I should be insulted about this or not... Shit! Shortbread needs to come out of the oven.
Nathaniel (to River): Already on it. Shortie's easy. It let's you know when it's done. Fucking muffins are always a mystery to me. Heh. And don't worry about the Dean thing. My uncle drives a murdered out Impala cause of that show. If you can believe it.
River (to Nathaniel): Wow... I don't think I ever saw what kind car he drove before. I bet that's a sweet ride.
Nathaniel (to River): I guess so. To me, it seemed huge and more than a little terrifying.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh... Sorry. Immature thought just went on in my head.
Nathaniel (to River): What? ... Oh Jesus! That's my uncle! God...
River (to Nathaniel): Look, I didn't say anything.
Nathaniel (to River): Yes you did. You mentioned it so that I would fill in the blanks, which is even WORSE than saying anything to begin with.
River (to Nathaniel): God, I'm sorry... But, the look on your face was pretty funny.
Nathaniel (to River): What? The look of pure unadulterated horror? God! Besides, it's not like Uncle Vincent has a Napoleon comple-- Oh. Wait. Maybe he does.
River (to Nathaniel): Heh... Let's get these cookies boxed up & get out of here. I don't want to push my luck.
Nathaniel (to River): Please. Let's. Before you fucking horrify me into a coma.
Several hours later, at Poppy & Vincent's apartment, West Piedmont:
Zoe: Oh my fucking god, that was so incredibly painful & embarrassing.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Will you calm the fuck down? You did fine.
Zoe (to Nathaniel): Really? I was so nervous... And, Colin didn't speak to me after I did it. I mean, I know he was busy but still.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Well, I thought you did fine. Honestly, you were a little creepy.
Zoe (to Nathaniel): ... Oh, I thought that was the point of Iago.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Heh. It IS. What I'm trying to tell you is that you did a good job. Take the compliment, ass!
Zoe (to Nathaniel): Geez, okay. Thanks. I wonder if I'll get a part. I'll probably be a tree or something boring.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): If they're gonna make anyone a tree, it would be that fat kid in the mustang t-shirt. Actually, they should probably make him a rock.
Zoe (to Nathaniel): What? But, his Edmund speech was soooooo go-- No, I can't even say that with a straight face.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Ha ha ha! I shouldn't laugh. I never had the guts to get up on stage. But... CHRIST!
Zoe (to Nathaniel): Heehee... I'm going to go call Colin & find out if I got a part.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): So, go then! Go make nice with your boyfriend.
Zoe (to Nathaniel): Oh, are you jealous? Would you rather I hung out with you? I can.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Heh. No I'm not jealous. I told you you were gonna find someone infinitely more interesting than me to hang around, didn't I? Besides, I'm trying not to blow you off so I can go make out with MY boyfriend. :-P
Zoe (to Nathaniel): Heh. I can take hint... Go on, go make out with your boyfriend.
Nathaniel (to Zoe): Likewise. :-P
A minute later:
Zoe (to Colin): Colin? Are you up? Can I bug you?
Colin (to Zoe): Hey! I'm up, and you never bug me. You ran out of the theater before I got a chance to talk to you. You did SUCH a good job.
Zoe (to Colin): Oh, thanks. I was so nervous... I didn't mean to run out, but you were busy talking to the director & I didn't want to interrupt.
Colin (to Zoe): Heh. You could've interrupted. Jessica isn't sure I should be the assistant director since she wants you in the production.
Zoe (to Colin): Oh, why? Would you give me preferential treatment or something?
Colin (to Zoe): Heh. Probably. No one else in the cast is gonna make out with me. It's alright. I don't mind not directing.
Zoe (to Colin): Heh... You sound awfully confident about that. How do you know I'm going to make out with you? :-P
Colin (to Zoe): You can't blame a guy for hoping, can you?
Zoe (to Colin): Heehee, not at all... I wouldn't mind making out with you right now.
Colin (to Zoe): Heh. I certainly wouldn't complain. Tomorrow is my last "official" day of grounding. I'm a free man! Do you wanna celebrate my freedom with me on Saturday?
Zoe (to Colin): Oh sure, what did you have in mind?
Colin (to Zoe): Sooooo, you may have mentioned to me that you thought going to a comic book store would make for a super awesome date.
Zoe (to Colin): Heehee, I believe I did.
Colin (to Zoe): So if I were to suggest getting lunch and wandering the streets of West Piedmont like wastrels, and then a visit to Alien Worlds Comics, you wouldn't be opposed? We could even catch a movie if you're up to it.
Zoe (to Colin): That sounds great... and, such a long time from now.
Colin (to Zoe): What are you trying to suggest, Miss Meriwether? Something unseemly?
Zoe (to Colin): Well yes, Mister Rathbone, I was. Are you scandalized & uninterested?
Colin (to Zoe): Yes. Shocked AND scandalized, but that's hardly the the same as uninterested, is it?
Zoe (to Colin): So, if I snuck over for a little while you wouldn't say no?
Colin (to Zoe): Oh HELL no. I mean, uh... If you want to, it's cool with me. Heh. Holy crap, I canNOT pretend to be cool & uninterested worth a damn. You'll have to be SUPER careful and quiet about it though. Especially since my dads know about your super power.
Zoe (to Colin): Heehee, I'll be as quiet as a mouse.
A moment later, at Jacob & Robert's house, East Piedmont:
Zoe (to Colin): Oof... Hi there.
Colin (to Zoe): Oh! Heh. Hi. I'm certainly not going to complain about this method of arrival.
Zoe (to Colin): ... I'm sorry. I just couldn't wait until Saturday to see you alone.
Colin (to Zoe): Really? Don't get me wrong; I'm not complaining, but you know you're gonna see me... Oh. Wow. I'm REALLY not complaining.
Zoe (to Colin): ... Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?
Colin (to Zoe): I may have heard that one or two times. Surprisingly.
Zoe (to Colin): Shhhh. Too pretty.
