A Strange New Day: Day 25

Poppy: You know what? Relationship are like sharks. If you're not left with several bite marks, then something's wrong.

Mouse (to Poppy): Oh dear god, it is too early for this...

Poppy (to Mouse): Oh honey, don't be such a prude... and by prude, I mean boring, and by boring, I mean you...

Eep (to Mouse): Don't acknowledge her. It only makes her evil grow. How are you doing today, pretty lady?

Mouse (to Eep): Wondering if last night was a weird dream... What the hell was up with Wanda & Poppy? And, it was so odd to see Robert there.

Eep (to Mouse): Right? I have no damn clue. I know Wanda was fucking wasted. When I got home last, her and Robert were still up and drinking beers on the couch. She shouted that she was a dirty old woman as soon as I walked in the door, then laughed so hard she fell over. Apparently part of the alure of Poppy is that she's dating Vincent and they are "the sex" as a couple. Which is gross. Really gross.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, they are adorable together, they're like a Cadbury Egg of Perv. All cute & innocent on the outside, but inside... ugh. I didn't even realize that Wanda was into girls... or is Poppy the first? Wait... I'm not sure I want to know.

Eep (to Mouse): Honestly, I don't know either. I know she likes guys & I know she had at least 1 girlfriend in that past, so... Shit. I dunno. And I still have no idea what Robert was doing there.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, he seemed to be watching you quite a bit... I thought I saw him take out a notebook at one point, but I got distracted.

Eep (to Mouse): God. He does that. CONSTANTLY. But, if I find out he's using me for research again...

Mouse (to Eep): Wait. He's used you for research before?

Eep (to Mouse): YES. Once for a magazine article about communal living and "your family of peers." And there was one short story with a very familiar sounding main character. It's the perils of living with a writer. According to him, that is. I've learned to stop reading his shit.

Mouse (to Eep): So, what you're telling me is that I should have been a little suspicious about him chatting with me on the porch this morning?

Eep (to Mouse): Maybe. It's tough to say with him. He's a fucking redheaded sphinx. What was he talking to you about?

Mouse (to Eep): Just normal "getting to know you" type questions... Where did I grow up? Did I go to college? Did I like deejaying? But, now that you mention that... it makes me realize he didn't really offer up anything about himself.

Eep (to Mouse): God. Also typical. I'm gonna find out what he's up to. (to Robert): OK. What the fuck are you up to? You're not getting research for anything, are you?

Mouse (to Eep): I mean, I don't mind being used as a character study for a story, I'd just like to know that's what he's doing.

Robert (to Eep): Foever and always. I'm never not gathering research. But, to answer the question you're not asking, maybe. I think I could do a nice write up on the club where hou work.

Eep (to Robert): What? And you weren't gonna ask anyone?

Robert (to Eep): Of course I was going to ask permission. I had to hit up a couple of my contacts to see if there would be any interest first. I'm not going to waste my time writing something I can't sell.

Eep (to Robert): And that's why you were giving Mouse the 3rd degree this morning?

Robert (to Eep): No. I was asking, because I was interested. Each time I've had a chance to talk to her, Wanda was either on a tear or you were being so anxious and suspicious of my motives, she clammed up.

Eep (to Robert): Oh.

Robert (to Eep): Honestly, I hadn't even considered it until Vincent forwarded me that Coyote Ugly video this morning.

Eep (to Robert): What Coyote Ugly video?

Robert (to Eep): It's Vincent & the other bartender doing a dance on the bar at your club. It's up on YouTube.

Eep (to Robert): Oh my fucking God.

Robert (to Eep): It looks pretty popular, actually.

Eep (to Robert): Of course it is... Wait. If you only decided to write something this morning, Why were you at the club last nite?

Robert (to Eep): Because Poppy invited me. I was curious to see what kind of a creature would date our Vincent.

Eep (to Mouse): Did you know Vincent & Delia have some video of their dance the other night up on YouTube?

Mouse (to Eep): They do? God, there's going to be no living with either of them...

Eep (to Mouse): And it's popular, apparently.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, that's nice... it's bad enough that people think goth club's are filled with freaky chicks that'll put out. Ugh.

Eep (to Mouse): Oh. And Robert admitted that he's interested in writing something up about the club, but only if he can find a publisher. He said he was only talking to you this morning because he was interested.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, that's a load off my mind, after what you said about being his research, I was a little worried.

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Well, don't be too relieved. You still may end up in one of his stories one day.

Mouse (to Eep): Well, all I ask is that he tells me he's doing it. That way, I'll be prepared to make stuff up. :-P (to Delia & Vincent) Which one of you posted the video on youtube?

Vincent (to Mouse): We r innocent! It was posted & filmed by 1 of the patrons that nite. I may have bragged abt it a bit, just a little, but I wasn't the 1 who posted it.

Delia (to Mouse): neither of us actually. I found it the morning after. Apparently its got satanica in a snit.

Mouse (to Delia & Vincent): Has Sasha seen it?

Delia (to Mouse & Vincent): That I'm not sure about. But, we kept it pg13, the bar seemed a little busier last night and its well received. Soooo... so far seems to have done more good then harm.

Vincent (to Mouse & Delia): I don't know. I was a bit afraid 2 ask w/ everything else that's going on. I'm sure he has. Our unknown videotographer tagged it as being @ Drac's Daughter. Plus, it's RLLY annoying Satanica.

Mouse (to Delia & Vincent): Well, that's good. I was actually wondering if it was Sasha that posted it.

Vincent (to Mouse & Delia): U know, I wldn't b surprised. I guess we'll find out if he asks us 2 do it again nxt Fri. ;-} AND, as an added bonus, it's RLLY annoying Satanica.

Mouse (to Delia): Remember the "burlesque/variety show" we put on before Vincent worked at the bar and a video leaked out of it? We all thought it was a patron & it ended up being Sasha & Satanica got mad, because no one seemed to like her performance.

Delia (to Mouse): oh yeah! I forgot about that! Man was she ever pissed. Come to think of it, if it was sasha it would make a lot of sense.

Mouse (to Delia & Vincent): This might be part of his plan for dealing with the new club.

Delia (to Mouse & Vincent): if he were mad I think he'd have said something before now.

Mouse (to Delia & Vincent): My only concern is that we saw an increase in assholes after the last video leak. It leveled out after they realized we weren't going to do anything all that exciting except dance & drink.

Delia (to Mouse & Vincent): that's just a fact of the biz. They always show their ass. We can deal w/ it.

Vincent (to Mouse & Delia): I don't think we'll have 2 much trouble... I wonder is Sasha is willing 2 rethink his position on my assleaa chaps?

Mouse (to Vincent): Until the health code changes, I don't think so.

Vincent (to Mouse): Outrageous! I'm writing a letter 2 my Senator! I'll include a pic of my butt so they'll know y the code needs 2 change.

Mouse (to Vincent): Sweetie, if they allowed you to wear chaps, then they'd have to let everyone. Think about that for a minute... Plus, our patrons would simply pass out from the sheer fabulousness of your butt & we'd never make any money. :-D

Delia (to Vincent): yeah... besides. It might melt if it gets wet. We wouldn't want that.

Vincent (to Delia & Mouse): Well, I can't argue with that. ;-}

A Strange New Day: Day 24

Mouse: Gah! Woke up to Greg sitting on the foot of my bed petting my cat. Apparently, we need to set some ground rules about his visits...

Delia (to Mouse): ...o.O. that would creepy just on an ex-bf basis. . Nevermind anything else.

Mouse (to Delia): You're telling me. So, not cool.

Delia (to Mouse): Apparently boundaries isn't something he grasps very well. But it does explain why Tesla was spazzing this morning.

Mouse (to Delia): Well, cats really like him for some weird reason... Otto was in heaven, you'd think Greg was coated in catnip.

Eep (to Mouse): Jesus! He did that to you too, huh? He scared the shit out of me this morning when I was shaving. He never had a good grasp of too early.

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, let's just say if my hair wasn't already white, it would be now. Did he try to ask you a bunch of personal questions, too?

Eep (to Mouse): Really. I'm just glad I use an electric razor. I'm not sure what he was talking about, actually. He kept asking something about companionship, but I wasn't awake enough to process it. What was he asking you?

Mouse (to Eep): God, he asked me, why did I feel the need or "desire" to be with you? And, was it you specifically or just anyone?

Eep (to Mouse): Oh Christ. That's a conversation you wanna have first thing in the fucking morning.

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, before coffee, not so good.

Eep (to Mouse): So, uh, what did you tell him? "Fuck off, Greg. It's too damn early?" Heh. I think that's what I said.

Mouse (to Eep): I told him that he needed to give me a couple hours & to come back.

Eep (to Mouse): So prep myself for an onslaught of uncomfortable questions fro Greg later. Got it.

Mouse (to Eep): Probably... sorry about this.

Eep (to Mouse): Don't worry about it. It's not your fault. Greg's been popping up like this since I was 15. I'm used to it. Besides, Leon needed the help and, well... Knowing my mom asked Greg to look in on me... It's dumb... but it's weirdly comforting, I guess?

Mouse (to Eep): Well, you've had a lot longer to get used to him showing up out of the blue, it's a little new to me... we didn't have that kind of relationship before. I guess, I'm just going to have to get used it.

Eep (to Mouse): Jesus. Yeah. It takes some getting usd to that's for sure. I'm sorry. You can always tell him to fuck off, you know. I do. All the time.

Mouse (to Eep): I would but it always makes me a little nervous to be rude to him, since the reason that I'm here is because of him, you know?

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. No, I get that. But I figured if he had a real good grasp of rude, he wouldn't appear first thing in the morning.

Mouse (to Eep): True... maybe, I should give him etiquette lessons. :-P

Eep (to Mouse): Heh. He'd probably like that. Proper human interaction and all.

Mouse (to Eep): Oh god, you're probably right... Well, he's back, 20 question time...

Robert: I now have a Twitter account. Call it an exercise in brevity. This is the only social networking tool my severely taciturn roommate, Eep, will use. I thought that made it worth checking out. What could he be saying on here? The allure of mystery was too great to resist.

Eep (to Robert): So you got a Twitter account just to spy on me?

Robert (to Eep): Would I do a thing like that?

Eep (to Robert): Yes.

Robert (to Eep): Well, I can't argue with you when you're right. You've been on Twitter so often lately, you've made me curious.

Eep (to Robert): Hey, Robert. Fuck off.

Robert (to Eep): I love you too, roommate o' mine.

Poppy (to Robert): Hi there, honey! And, who might you be?

Robert (to Poppy): I don't think you and I have ever met face-to-face. I'm Eep's non-female roommate. I know your boyfriend Vincent as well.

Poppy (to Robert): Oh wait, honey, you're that Robert? I have heard SO much about you from Vincent.

Robert (to Poppy): Likewise. I think it's best we both agree, everything we've heard about one another from Vincent is complimentary. Of course, in your case, it's true. He borders on gushing about you. It's adorable.

Poppy (to Robert): Oh honey, I like you... I think you should be my new best friend!

Robert (to Poppy): Well, from what Vincent says, you drink too much, ogle too many men, and are a bit of an egomaniac. So we have a TON in common.

Poppy (to Robert): Oh honey, you are comin' in loud & queer! You should come to the club with me, tonight and we can dish, drink & ogle the bois. You can even bring your hag with you, if you'd like, honey.

Robert (to Poppy): Well, I don't really have the wardrobe for a goth club. I go with more the "casual slob" look. But, I would love to put a name to Vincent's braggadocios tales. Plus, it's always fun to harass poor, hapless Eep. Are they very strict about the dress code at Dracula's Daughter? And, by "hag," I assume you mean Wanda.

Poppy (to Robert): Is that her name, honey? I don't normally pay attention to other women's names... Do you have a black t-shirt & a pair of dark trousers?

Robert (to Poppy): I can do you one better. I believe I own a dark button up shirt and a pair of black jeans. Shall we consider it a date?

Poppy (to Robert): That will work, honey! Just make sure Wanda's not wearing the plaid ensemble I've heard about... If she wears that, it'll be a four day drive & a boat trip to a place called 'hope' before any hot bois want to talk to us.

Robert (to Poppy): I've never had Wanda's fashion choices inhibit me before, but I'll pass along the info: plaid has been banned.

Poppy (to Robert): Oh, I am so looking forward to it, honey.

Robert (to Poppy): I'll see you tonight. Look for a chubby redhead hanging out with a blue-haired waif.

Delia (to Vincent): ummmm... sugar butt? Not sure how to say this but. Well. Our little performance has made it onto youtube.

Vincent (to Delia): Oh dear. I don't know if Sasha is going to like that.

Delia (to Vincent): yeeeah. I mean.. he didn't seem too upset since we kept it pretty pg-13 last night. But.. still.

Vincent (to Delia): Well, I suppose we'll find out 2nite how he feels. Eek! Now, on 2 the important part. How many pg views does our video have & how many people r saying we're hotness incarnate?

Delia (to Vincent): heheh.. actually? It looks like it got put up a couple hours ago and there's a couple thousand views. But its tagged as 'goth coyote ugly' so make of it what you will. I don't normally read youtube comments but.. seems pretty well received. We'll just have to see if attendance spikes.

Vincent (to Delia): As if there was a doubt it would be well-received. ;-} Plus, it looks like we've upset poor ickle Satanica.

Delia (to Vincent): lord.. she probably is going to take it as a challenge then get herself in trouble for having nudity without a permit...

Vincent (to Delia): Here's hoping.

An hour or so later:

Eep (to Mouse): How's it going? Or do I not want to know?

Mouse (to Eep): Ok, I guess. I'm really tempted to give him a copy of that old 70's book 'What's Happening to me?' Some of these questions... sheesh.

Eep (to Mouse): God... I would say that's a good idea, but if you did, he'd probably ask us a million questions about what's in the book. I can just imagine the questions now, "Eep, have you noticed that you've developed 'secondary sex characteristics?'"

Mouse (to Eep): Well, I think we're done with questions for today... so, he may be coming your way. He seems to be more interested in the emotional aspect or at least, that's what he was asking me about... but who knows?

Eep (to Mouse): Great. Cause I'm so fucking good at talking about that. :p

Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, well, how do you think I feel, my "ex" wants to talk to me and my present boyfriend about relationships? Talk about awkward.

A few minutes later:

Eep (to Mouse): God, this is about as bad as I thought it would be

Mouse (to Eep): Oh god, what is he asking you about?

Eep (to Mouse): Uh... mostly, um, physical stuff. And how that "effects the emotional bond." God. You SO don't wanna know anything else.

Mouse (to Eep): I'm so sorry... Wow, that's not uncomfortable, at all!

Eep (to Mouse): Yeah. Remember when I said I didn't mind Greg visiting me? Fat Christ!

Several hours later:

Mouse (to Eep): Uh, is that Robert & Wanda sitting with Poppy?

Eep (to Mouse): Oh Jesus. Yes. Tonight is gonna be SO interesting. I was being sarcastic.

Mouse (to Eep): Is this Robert's first time here?

Eep (to Mouse): Yes.

Mouse (to Eep): Why after all of this time has he decided to come out? And, why is he hanging out with Poppy? No good can come of them hanging out together.

Delia (to Eep): ... is your roommate making eyes at Poppy? Are both your roommates gay?

Eep (to Delia): Fucked if I know. (to Robert) OK. Going goth are we? What the fuck are you doing here, Robert?

Poppy (to Mouse): Tell Eep to focus his outrage where it belongs... At his father. I like Robert, he's been getting us free drinks.

Eep (to Poppy): Ha ha. You're almost funny.

Robert (to Poppy, Mouse & Eep): That is my talent.

Poppy (to Robert): You are fabulous, honey... If I was a man, I'd totally take you home. (to Eep) honey, it's very rude to eavesdrop.

Eep (to Poppy): Stop talking about me then.

Robert (to Poppy): Heh. You're not the first straight girl to tell me that.

Delia (to Leon): ... wow. Was I that awkward before our first date? I think Eep's female roomie is trying to flirt w/ Poppy.

Poppy (to Robert): Oh honey, I may be straight but I'm not narrow... Is your hag mad at me? She keeps narrowing her eyes at me. (to Eep) Ooh honey, you wanna make your girlfriend jealous?

Eep (to Poppy): No.

Robert (to Poppy): Ha! Wanda really isn't my hag, and she's probably staring at you because she thinks you're cute.

Poppy (to Robert): Really? Well, if she was a boi, she'd totally be my type. (to Vincent) What do you think of Wanda, honey? (to Eep) Oh honey, trust me, in the end, this will be nothing but good for you...

Eep (to Poppy): Yeah... No.

Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo. Totes adorbz! She has 0 interest in me, tho. Tragically. ;-}

Delia (to Vincent): ...yeah but I think wanda likes your gf though... I've been watching this. Its awkward and weird.

Robert (to Poppy): Ha! She's drunk. Just ignore her. Unless, you don't want to, of course.

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, she's apparently making eyes at me...

Vincent (to Poppy): Well who wldn't make eyes @ u, sweetness?

Poppy (to Vincent): Oh honey, remember that fantasy I told you about?

Vincent (to Poppy): How can I forget it? What r u thinking?

Poppy (to Vincent): Well, what about her? Or would that be weird?

Vincent (to Poppy): Rlly? Do u think she'd wear the costume?

Poppy (to Vincent): We're in negotiations now, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Godspeed. Remember: if she vetoes me, take lots & lots of pics!

Poppy (to Vincent): You don't wanna watch? That's not gonna be any fun without you, honey.

Vincent (to Poppy): Hun, if she will let me watch, I'm more than willing.

Eep (to Mouse): God. Robert just keeps looking over at me and smirking.

Mouse (to Eep): I'd give you a hug, but I'm afraid the smirk would be bigger & there would, possibly, be more of them.

Eep (to Mouse): Fuck them both. I've had a weird fucking night. I would love a hug.

Mouse (to Eep): Alrighty then, I'll be right there.

Delia (to Leon): oh wow.. I am learning way more about Vincent and Poppy's intimate life then I want to know just by suggestive looks alone.

Leon (to Delia): Poppy is quite a creature. Flirts and makes out with everything even remotely attractive and shrugged off last weekend. Fun.

Delia (to Leon): in small doses? Yes. She's very much like espresso. Too much makes you crazy.

Mouse (to Eep): oh god, Robert & Wanda made song requests... They apparently don't seem to understand where they are.

Eep (to Mouse): God... Probably not.

Mouse (to Poppy): Could you & Wanda please take your game of perv chicken outside? It's a bit distracting.

Poppy (to Mouse): Party pooper!

Robert (to Eep): This evening was VERY interesting. You and Mouse are so very cute together.

Eep (to Robert): Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Mouse (to Robert): Oh Daddy, you say the sweetest things!

Robert (to Mouse): Your mom and I like to think we done raised you right.