Poppy: I hate sitting in doctor's waiting rooms... for some reason, it always fills me with a sense of impending doom.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You look a bit ready to bolt for the door. How are you holding up, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): Um, like I'm about to bolt for the door... I'm not too fond of doctors, and my feelings for them have gotten worse. I think I've gotten a little skittish about them since my last experience with one was being put into stasis.
Vincent (to Poppy): I can't say that I blame you there, hun. Dr. Addison is wonderful. Don't worry. And, as I said, as long as she feels like you're going to be OK, she won't ask too many tough questions.
Poppy (to Vincent): Questions, I can handle... it's the antiseptic smell, the equipment... oh... no, no, I'm okay.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, hun! You look absolutely green around the gills. Come here. Lay your head down, and take nice even breaths.
Poppy (to Vincent): I think I need a distraction... tell me something to take my mind off of this, please?
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, I could tell you some ridiculous rumors from the other side, you could tell me how wonderful that church picnic was... Hee hee. I could kiss you, but that would have to be one hell of a long makeout session. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): As much as I would enjoy the kissing, I think you should tell me some silly rumors...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let's see... Oh! There's a good one about Captain Rackham, the gentleman who warned us about the Guard last night. He has two reputedly beautiful women, Annie and Marie, crewing with him. According to "certain sources"... They share a mad, passionate three way relationship that began after Jack made a deal with a demon to be a better pirate. In some versions, Annie herself is the demon! The truth of the matter is that Jack was a crap pirate, and was extraordinarily fortunate to get crew like Annie and Marie.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, the rumor mill, you've gotta love it, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): I know. It's a scream! Annie and Marie are also not in a relationship with Jack. They much prefer each other's company. They're also not all that lovely. I believe it's why poor Captain Rackham was so intrigued by takes of you and dear sister.
Poppy (to Vincent): Yes, because loading & unloading boxes is such glamorous work. I wonder why the ladies stay with Rackham if he's such crap?
Vincent (to Poppy): For all his faults, he's trustworthy. He didn't have to alert us to the Guard returning to Charred Cross last night. And in this business, someone you can trust is often more valuable than raw talent. That and finding people whose company you can tolerate. It can be a challenge being crammed onto a ship for lengthy periods.
Poppy (to Vincent): Makes sense, honey. Tell me another one... I should be the next patient, so not much longer.
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, speaking of people who can barely stand to be on a ship together... Did you ever hear the rumor about "the Dandy" having a torrid one-night affair with one of the crown princes? Ripper borrowed that one for "Gears, Gadgets, & Glory," much to his unending chagrin.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, I read the book but I didn't realize it had come from a circulating rumor. Was it about you & Alistair?
Vincent (to Poppy): The prince is unknown. Popular speculation is that it's Prince Albert, because he's a little swishy. The truth of the matter is that I started the rumor in order to annoy Alistair after we had our falling out. He was always more than a little mortified about how we met. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I bet he was... Oh, it looks like it's my turn to see the doctor. Thank you for the stories, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): See you in a few, hun.
An hour or so later:
Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, all set. Pretty stitches in place, prescriptions given... Oh, and Dr. Addison wanted to talk to you.
Vincent (to Poppy): Uh oh. I'm in trouble.
Poppy (to Vincent): She said something about you only coming to visit her when you're hurt... so, yes, you might be in trouble. :-P
Ten minutes later:
Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo. Did I just get an earful! I am expressly forbidden from coming to see her as a patient until she gets a proper visit. I was also reprimanded for not taking better care of myself, giving you home stitches, and not scheduling proper check-ups.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I know what someone is doing sometime soon. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Good gracious I should say so!
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, better you than me, honey... She did seem really nice, so thank you for bringing me here. Shall we go?
Vincent (to Poppy): Yes! Quickly! Before she remembers something else to be angry with me about! Dr. Addison is a peach, even if she can be a bit no nonsense. Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you really do make friends wherever you go, don't you? :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): I am good at charming people. It's the only reason I still work at Drac's, because, let's face it, I'm a DREADFUL bartender.
Poppy (to Vincent): Yes it's quite obvious that your talents clearly lie elsewhere, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Good heavens, you don't have to tell me. However, I'll have you know that I have been practicing.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh... well, that's good, honey... Saved by the bell. I've got a phone call. Just a second, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Why is that the reaction everyone has when I mention mixing drinks? :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, that was an awkward phone call... So, what were we talking about?
Vincent (to Poppy): Is everything OK, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, everything is fine. It was Gavin from work. He's the magician I helped out as assistant last week... He was asking me if I'd like to get coffee sometime & talk about the possibility of me being his assistant full time. Apparently, he & Daisy broke up... She was his former assistant.
Vincent (to Poppy): Ah! Am I correct in assuming the position of "assistant" comes with a romance clause?
Poppy (to Vincent): Apparently... I told him that I was so incredibly flattered, but that I was going to have to decline. He seemed a bit shocked that I said no. I don't think that happens to him often. I mean, he is gorgeous but so egotistical. I'm surprised Daisy put up with him for as long as she did.
Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't blame you for not wanting to work with him even at the least. I hope it doesn't make work awkward for you.
Poppy (to Vincent): It shouldn't, honey. All the girls warned me about him when I started working there. He's only interested because I'm new. Besides, he looks at himself in the mirror a little too much for my taste. If I'm going to be with someone, I'd like them to look at me once in awhile & not treat me like an accessory.
Vincent (to Poppy): I can't blame you one bit, hun. Oh! Speaking of jobs, I owe you and the Gloomies your share of the money we make last night.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, that is music to my ears, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. If you'd rather have it in funds that you can use in Britannia, let me know. But, I thought you had more need of it here.
Poppy (to Vincent): No, this is perfect. If I were to put it into anything back home, Percy might get a hold of it for his own sordid use. And, I earned it fair & square.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Very true, hun. Don't worry, the next trip should be a little more lucrative. This was just an easy peasy run.
Poppy (to Vincent): So, honey, I know you're dying to ask about the picnic, so go ahead ask me anything.
Vincent (to Poppy): I AM curious, I have to admit. Hee. I'm also slightly terrified to ask, if you want to know the truth. Was it dreadful?
Poppy (to Vincent): No, the picnic was like a normal picnic, except with a few differences. Prayers before we ate, bible readings, a few people were abstaining from drinking alcohol & just had lemonade or ice tea. Most of the folks were nice enough if a little culty. Your father was very charming, he went around to all of the new members and said hello... there were a few he lingered with more than others... he held their hand a little too long when he shook them. Your mother was like a Queen Bee flitting around basking in the fact that she was the belle of the ball, so to speak. She loves that fact that your father is so respected by the church & its members... She's the one that's going to hate being knocked down a few pegs.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hmmm. That's quite an astute observation, hun. Believe me, she's going to be the one who gets nasty.
Poppy (to Vincent): I purposely said a scathing remark about a lady's dress within earshot of her & she came over to join in and then next thing I knew she's inviting me to tea. She reminds me of Lady Macbeth.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. OH! Hee hee hee. That is perhaps the most accurate description of my mother I've ever heard. She seems caring and outgoing when she's in public. Privately, she was always rather cold, I suppose. At least towards me. Of course, that could be because I was a divine embarrassment. She was not thrilled with her small, effeminate youngest son.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I don't doubt it. You probably served to remind her that she married a gay man... I mean, your parents do not like each other in the slightest. They performed an avoidance ballet the likes of which I've never seen before. They were always in each other's peripheral vision, but never close to each other the whole time. Even when they were saying goodbye to folks, there was a gap of, at least, two feet between them. I get the impression that your father is doing all of this stuff to make her happy & he thinks he deserves to suffer for the sins he's committed or would like to commit. I'd feel bad for him, if he wasn't such a super duper asshole with an extra helping of douchebag. Pardon my French, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): No offense taken, hun. My dad is... Well, he's complicated. He was equal parts loving, and terrifying. He'd be hitting at me or screaming Bible verses at me one week. And then take me to dinner or bragging to his friends about how good I was in a school play the next. The constant drinking didn't help matter, of course. I never knew if he was going to be angry, or loving.
Poppy (to Vincent): I understand, honey. My father drank a lot after the death of my mother. I don't think he ever recovered from it... Somedays he'd be all rainbows & kittens and then others, yelling at me about what a burden I was & she should have lived. Boy, that got dark fast... now I think we both need a drink.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm sorry, hun. I know how awful that is to hear. And a drink would be wonderful!
Poppy (to Vincent): So, let's talk about something else unless you have any questions about the picnic...
Vincent (to Poppy): I probably will later, sweetie. But for right now, I think I've heard enough. Too many bad memories, I'm afraid.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, at least, we both have the opportunity to make some good memories, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): This couldn't be more true. I'm a very lucky lad. For all the rocky beginnings, I have a wonderful life now.
Poppy (to Vincent): Here's your drink, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Thanks, hun. Here's to leaving shitty times behind, and moving forward to bigger and better things!
Poppy (to Vincent): I'll drink to that!
An hour or so later:
Mouse: Took a nap on the couch, woke up covered in cats... I think I may have to move and find a new place to live.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. That sounds adorable, sweetie! The bitty kitties aren't old enough to walk around yet, are they?
Mouse (to Vincent): No, I think someone piled them on me... I'm not sure who, but I have my suspicions.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I didn't think Gloomy Gus had it in him. Oooo! I hope he took a picture.
Mouse (to Vincent): Yeah, yeah. Don't encourage him... I'm the one who's going to suffer if he gets himself a sense of humor. :-P
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I don't know how worried you should be about that, honestly. :-P Oh, oh, OH! I totes have money for you and Mr. Von Gloomenburg!
Mouse (to Vincent): Really? That's great. Do you want to bring it over here or should I come to you?
Vincent (to Mouse): Ummm. You should come here. Yes. You should definitely come here. We may have been drinking. And by "may have been drinking," I mean we are totes sloshed.
Mouse (to Vincent): Oh? I can hold off until tomorrow, I'm in no hurry to get it just yet. Is everything alright?
Vincent (to Mouse): What? A man can't get tipsy in the middle of the day on a Monday... Oh wow. That sounds WAY worse than I thought it would. We're fine. Poppy was telling me about her fun time at the ol' homestead... Oh. Wait. I guess it's NOT the ol' homestead, is it? The picnic! She was telling me about the picnic, and that got us to talking about our parents and that got us to drinking. Now we're watching cartoons and drinking adult beverages with silly straws. Hee hee.
Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, well that definitely sounds like a good day so far. Why don't you stop talking to your sister & spend some quality time with the young lady sitting with you? Or would that be a comment you're going to choose to ignore? :-P
Vincent (to Mouse): Ooo, woman! Aren't you a snarky one today? Tell that stud of yours to put you in a better mood. And for YOUR INFO, I have been spending quality time with Poppy. All day. She's probably sick to death of me by now. So there!
Mouse (to Vincent): HAHAHA! Yes, I am feeling properly shunned, little brother. And, I have a feeling that if Poppy didn't want to spend time with you, I don't think she would.
Vincent (to Mouse): But if you insist on being ignored. Ignore you I shall. Can you feel it? Can you feel the ignoring taking place right now?
Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth have you been drinking? It's been quite awhile since you've been this drunkenly silly.
Vincent (to Mouse): Eh? What's that? I seem to hear something as if someone were speaking to me from a very, very long way away. Almost as if someone I was ignoring were trying to communicate... Hee hee. I'm just kidding. You know I love you. I have NO IDEA what I'm drinking. Poppy has been the bartender because I suck at it. I do seem to be rather on the goofy side. Maybe it's the straw. Ohhhh... Oh. OH! Or she used that rum I got from Captain Birdie. Oh dear.
Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth is a Captain Birdie? (to Poppy) What on earth did you give Vincent to drink? He's been pretty goofy.
Poppy (to Mouse): It's just a Rum Cooler, but we've been drinking it out of silly straws... Have you ever watched a cartoon called Jem?
Mouse (to Poppy): Yes, when I was a kid... Is that what you're watching? You guys are drunker than I thought.
Poppy (to Mouse): Heehee, it's truly outrageous... Oh, now I get the name of the burlesque performer...
Vincent (to Mouse): Captain Birdie is a who, not a what. He gave me a bottle of his "special" home-brewed rum as a thank you. I've never actually consumed it. I was using it as a degreaser... (to Poppy) Hun, did this rum come out of a corked brown bottle? It had a label with a bird on it?
Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): God, are you two going to need a chaperone?
Poppy (to Vincent): No, honey, it came from a bottle with a squid looking thing... probably a squid.
Vincent (to Mouse): You just want to come over here and drink my hooch. I've intrigued you with my talk of paint-peeling pirate rum. (to Poppy) Ah ha! So that explains... absolutely nothing. I had squid rum? That's amazing!
Mouse (to Vincent): No, if I wanted to drink rum, I'd do it here...
Poppy (to Vincent): Does it, honey? That's wonderful.
Vincent (to Mouse): But is it PIRATE rum? Could it potentially blind you? No! My rum contains adventure! PIRATE ADVENTURE. You can't resist. You can't resist the allure of possibly fatal pirate adventure rum. You know you can't. Are you, Mouse? Are scared of pirate adventure rum?
Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, do you actually want me to come over and drink your potentially blinding alcohol? I mean, one of us should keep our eyesight... Who will be left to steer the ship?
Vincent (to Poppy): I think my sister is scared of my pirate adventure rum. (to Mouse) Pffft! We let Otto steer the ship. It's probably only a matter of time before he mutinies and takes over the business anyway. Did you realize he went with us the other night? Hee hee. He was super stealthy about it, but he was still there?
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh well, she's missing out on adventure...
Mouse (to Vincent): Yes, I saw him when I went to help Poppy in the hold. We pretended not to see him. I'm sure he was torn between staying at home with his children & protecting me.
Vincent (to Mouse): He's a fur-covered sweetheart despite his foul disposition. Oh my GOD. He's like a cat version of Eep! Ha ha ha! Oh sweet Jesus!
Mouse (to Vincent): Oh god, and he smokes all the time, too... he is a cat version of Eep.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee hee! Oh. Oh God... Well, as long as he doesn't start painting, I think you're alright, sweetie.
Mouse (to Vincent): Speaking of my mister, I should start actually making the dinner, he'll be home shortly.
Vincent (to Mouse): OK. Talk to you later, sweet sister. Enjoy your night. And remember, if it's too boring: pirate adventure rum!
Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, why are you wearing those pirate boots? When did you put those on? Are we playing dress up?
Vincent (to Poppy): These are my pirate adventure rum drinkin' boots. This is the only acceptable footwear for pirate adventure rum.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I feel completely under-dressed now, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hun, you ALWAYS look fabulous. You know this is fact.
Poppy (to Vincent): You're sweet! I'm going to rummage in your closet, honey...
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Go ahead, hun. Godspeed! I've got more than a few inexplicable things in there.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I should say so... What on earth is this?
Vincent (to Poppy): Is it the matador ensemble? I STILL don't know where that came from? Oh that? Oh dear Lord... THAT would be from my "bedazzled sweater" collection. I believe those are supposed to be kittens. If you think that's scary, you haven't found the silk cowboy shirts in the back.
Poppy (to Vincent): That is truly terrifying, honey... Oooooh, I found something that I'm putting on right now... If I'm not mistaken it's the evil princess dress from Legend... Now all I need is to kill a unicorn. :-P I think I'm going to wear this dress all the time... You have cowboy shirts? I have got to see them... this closet is huge.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh... Oh my. I will certainly not complain if you do, hun. You look... Wow. And yes. That closet is ridiculous. It's one of the reasons I took this apartment. Cowboy shirts should be towards the back.
Poppy (to Vincent): OH MY GOD! These are hideously awesome! ... Alright, I'm done... I need more rum. Honey, are you okay? If your eyes get any wider, they might fall out of your head.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, good heavens! I'm sorry, hun. I was staring. That is certainly embarrassing. You cut quite an impressive figure in that dress, and usually I have a bit more tact than that. Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey, I'll forgive you this time since you're drink, I mean, drunk. heehee.
Vincent (to Poppy): At least I'm not drunk alone. Speaking of which... My silly straw is dry. I think we should rectify this and watch more Jem.
Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, you are so smart! That sounds brilliant.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm not about to contradict a beautiful woman in a pretty dress. What I'm going to do is pour her another drink.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I have to admit, honey, I could get used to this kind of treatment... I may have to keep this dress. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! If you want it, hun, it's yours.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, I may need some black lipstick & hair gel... I'll be right back. There, honey, now the costume is complete... heehee. I hear a throat begging to be cut! I will have to wear this to Drac's sometimes.
Vincent (to Poppy): I haven't worn it since the Halloween Delia and I did gender-bent Legend costumes at Drac's. Damn did we make a TON of tips. I guarantee you will not pay for a single drink all night.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I doubt I could be that lucky, honey. What did you make this time, it tastes different?
Vincent (to Poppy): I don't doubt it. This DOES taste odd, doesn't it? Oh shit! Spit it out, hun! I wasn't paying attention when I poured and it's got Captain Birdie's rum in it.
Poppy (to Vincent): Good god, honey, that tastes like the rotgut my brothers used to make in our backyard.
Vincent (to Poppy): It's probably the same recipe. Captain James Birdie isn't known for his refined tastes. Ugh! We're lucky we can still see. Let me get us something a bit more palpable.
Poppy (to Vincent): Are you hungry, honey? I'm feeling a little peckish.
Vincent (to Poppy): Mmm. I probably SHOULD eat. I think I've hit the amount of alcohol my frame can handle without food. Ooo! Do you want to catch the bus into town, go to dinner dressed like this, and scare the shit out of the straights?
Poppy (to Vincent): But, of course, honey! That's always so much fun.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let me go pirate myself up a little bit more then. I think I need a sash and shirt with FAR more ruffles.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh yes... I need to put on some shoes. Can we go get sushi?
Vincent (to Poppy): Sushi would be PERFECT. Let me know when you're properly shod, and we'll be off. Do you need something warm to throw over that dress, hun? I think I have the perfect accessory.
Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, I didn't have any proper shoes to go with it, so I went with boots. Really? This collar makes coats a wee bit difficult.
Vincent (to Poppy): Boots are always appropriate. And with a dress like that, you skip the jacket all together and go for a cloak. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, that is lovely... And, you look magnificent. Just like Errol Flynn in The Sea Hawk. If I wasn't starving... Well, you can probably guess what I'd like to do.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh my. I can take several guesses and I like the way all of them end. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, if we hurry back, maybe, we can end the evening that way? ;-)
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, my goodness. Are you trying to seduce me, Miss Poppy?
Poppy (to Vincent): I certainly hope so... Is it working?
Vincent (to Poppy): In spades. Hee hee. You don't really go much for innuendo, do you?
Poppy (to Vincent): Why bother with innuendo, honey, when straight talk works so much better?
Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't argue with that, hun.
Mouse (to Eep): Hey there mister man! How was work?
Eep (to Mouse): Pretty good, actually. I didn't get into a single argument all day. Personal record. How's your day been?
Mouse (to Eep): Good & quiet...Well, except for the waking up from my nap with all the cats on me. You wouldn't happen to know how that happened?
Eep (to Mouse): ALL the cats were on you? Huh. Wow. That's weird.
Mouse (to Eep): Really? Am I supposed to believe that you didn't do it?
Eep (to Mouse): Um... Yes?
Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, you didn't take a photo, did you?
Eep (to Mouse): Shit! No. I didn't think of it. Damn. Oh, I mean, uhhh... I don't know what you're talking about.
Mouse (to Eep): Oh good... I'm glad you don't know anything about it... Food's ready. I, uh, tried my hand at empanadas. I hope they turned out okay.
Eep (to Mouse): You did what? Wow. I'm... Wow. Heh. I'm surprised you wanted to try them with as often as I chased you outta the kitchen.
Mouse (to Eep): Well, it WAS a lot easier without you smacking my hand. You can be brutally honest about them, I'd like your opinion.
Eep (to Mouse): Wow... You went a little lighter on the seasoning in the meat than I would have, but the crust... What did you do to the crust? It... Holy shit. It tastes just like the way my mom used to make them. What did you do differently?
Mouse (to Eep): I used a combination of butter & shortening for the crust. I thought it might give it a better taste & I figured traditional recipes wouldn't use shortening.
Eep (to Mouse): Huh. Wow. I'm knocked on my ass here. These are delicious.
Mouse (to Eep): You really like them? I was nervous about making them. I won't step on your toes, as I know you like to make them. But, I just wanted to see if I could.
Eep (to Mouse): No! No. It's not that. I'm probably making a weird ass face, huh?
Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, a little.
Eep (to Mouse): I like them! It's just, uh, heh... No one has made empanadas for me in a really long time, is all. It's dumb, but it was a big deal when my mom made them when I was little. That's all. Sorry. These are really good.
Mouse (to Eep): Oh... it's not dumb. I just wanted to make them for you. I didn't think about your mom. I'm sorry.
Eep (to Mouse): That wasn't a complaint, you know. This is amazing. Thank you. It's nice. Really nice. It's... Heh. It's not something I can explain without feeling like a huge dickhead. So, thanks. I love you, you empanada making gringa.
Mouse (to Eep): I love you too, you foul mouthed grumpy ass.
A couple hours later:
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you'd think I looked scary the way all of the other bus patrons have taken up sitting as far away as possible.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I'm assuming it's because they're afraid they won't be able to contain their lust for you. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, someone just pinched my butt... I hope it was you, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): It wasn't me, hun. And, I'm guessing you weren't the one who goosed me either. Good heavens.
Poppy (to Vincent): Who knew that riding on the bus was such an adventure? I'm glad we have rum back at the house.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I always have good ideas with you, hun. Oh my... I think perhaps having a saké at the restaurant was a bad idea.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you're drunk again, honey... Or wait, is it still?
Vincent (to Poppy): I don't think I ever regained soberness. Is soberness a word? Soberness is a word now! SOBERNESS IS TOTES NOW A WORD.
Poppy (to Vincent): So, what you're saying is now would be a great time to ask you questions... of which I cannot think of any to ask. Damn. This dress was much easier to maneuver in before. heehee. And it was way easier to get in then getting out seems to be… I think it's a trap. I'm going to be like one of those cartoon characters forever stuck in the same clothes...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, if you're looking to get out of that dress, hun, I'm more than willing to help you. Out of the goodness of my heart, of course.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh that would be helpful, honey... don't peek.
Vincent (to Poppy): I will be a perfect gentleman. Until you ask me not to be. Hee hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): I wouldn't go that far, honey... I like scoundrels.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You must like me because I'm a scoundrel. There aren't enough scoundrels in your life...
Poppy (to Vincent): I happen to like nice men.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm nice...
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee… Did it just get really warm in here?
Vincent (to Poppy): Whew. More than a bit. Do you want something else to drink? I think I should probably get some water in me at this point.
Poppy (to Vincent): Water would be good with lots of ice.
Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. How are you feeling?
Poppy (to Vincent): I'm feeling alright. Heehee, I think the waiter gave you his phone number on the receipt for the sushi, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): He did? Well. So, he did. What's this little drawing he added at the bottom? Oh good heavens! THAT'S explicit. Well, now I know WHY he gave me his phone number. Oh my... Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh my... I wonder if that's an offer? heehee. You should call him, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. That's alright, hun. I think I'd rather date someone who asked me out in person rather than draws dirty pictures on receipts.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee. Really, honey?
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh good heavens, no. I've already done the horrible, shameful hookup thing. I'd rather avoid making THAT mistake again. Heh. Especially right now with all this bullshit that's going on with my parents.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, then I guess I shouldn't give you this silly doodle I was drawing, then. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! No. No, I'm afraid I can't accept this. You'll have to ask me to do that in person like a civilized person. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I'm not even sure what it's called, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Let me take a better look at that. Oh. I'm not sure what that's called either. Good heavens. Is that position even possible?
Poppy (to Vincent): I saw it in a book once.
Vincent (to Poppy): Clearly, it made an impression. I don't know that we could do that without pulling out your stitches.
Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey. I was just teasing, anyway... I was just inspired by the receipt graffiti.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, you can't blame a lad for being hopeful.
Poppy (to Vincent): What pray tell are you hopeful about, honey? I think I've made it perfectly clear that all you have to do is ask.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. Yes, you have, hun. I...uh. Good heavens. When did I get this awkward?
Poppy (to Vincent): I don't know... You seemed much more confident & smooth when you thought I was PoppyBot.
Vincent (to Poppy): Sorry, hun. In a way, after I found out she was an automaton, things were a bit less complicated with PoppyBot. I like you quite a bit more, so I guess I'm a bit more nervous... Oh good heavens! I am CLEARLY too drunk to speak.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, heehee, you don't have to be nervous, honey. I like it when you speak your mind. Besides, I like you quite a bit, too...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I guess you do like scoundrels, after all. So... Um, would you like to join me in the bedroom, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): I thought you'd never ask, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You look a bit ready to bolt for the door. How are you holding up, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): Um, like I'm about to bolt for the door... I'm not too fond of doctors, and my feelings for them have gotten worse. I think I've gotten a little skittish about them since my last experience with one was being put into stasis.
Vincent (to Poppy): I can't say that I blame you there, hun. Dr. Addison is wonderful. Don't worry. And, as I said, as long as she feels like you're going to be OK, she won't ask too many tough questions.
Poppy (to Vincent): Questions, I can handle... it's the antiseptic smell, the equipment... oh... no, no, I'm okay.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, hun! You look absolutely green around the gills. Come here. Lay your head down, and take nice even breaths.
Poppy (to Vincent): I think I need a distraction... tell me something to take my mind off of this, please?
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, I could tell you some ridiculous rumors from the other side, you could tell me how wonderful that church picnic was... Hee hee. I could kiss you, but that would have to be one hell of a long makeout session. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): As much as I would enjoy the kissing, I think you should tell me some silly rumors...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let's see... Oh! There's a good one about Captain Rackham, the gentleman who warned us about the Guard last night. He has two reputedly beautiful women, Annie and Marie, crewing with him. According to "certain sources"... They share a mad, passionate three way relationship that began after Jack made a deal with a demon to be a better pirate. In some versions, Annie herself is the demon! The truth of the matter is that Jack was a crap pirate, and was extraordinarily fortunate to get crew like Annie and Marie.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, the rumor mill, you've gotta love it, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): I know. It's a scream! Annie and Marie are also not in a relationship with Jack. They much prefer each other's company. They're also not all that lovely. I believe it's why poor Captain Rackham was so intrigued by takes of you and dear sister.
Poppy (to Vincent): Yes, because loading & unloading boxes is such glamorous work. I wonder why the ladies stay with Rackham if he's such crap?
Vincent (to Poppy): For all his faults, he's trustworthy. He didn't have to alert us to the Guard returning to Charred Cross last night. And in this business, someone you can trust is often more valuable than raw talent. That and finding people whose company you can tolerate. It can be a challenge being crammed onto a ship for lengthy periods.
Poppy (to Vincent): Makes sense, honey. Tell me another one... I should be the next patient, so not much longer.
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, speaking of people who can barely stand to be on a ship together... Did you ever hear the rumor about "the Dandy" having a torrid one-night affair with one of the crown princes? Ripper borrowed that one for "Gears, Gadgets, & Glory," much to his unending chagrin.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, I read the book but I didn't realize it had come from a circulating rumor. Was it about you & Alistair?
Vincent (to Poppy): The prince is unknown. Popular speculation is that it's Prince Albert, because he's a little swishy. The truth of the matter is that I started the rumor in order to annoy Alistair after we had our falling out. He was always more than a little mortified about how we met. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I bet he was... Oh, it looks like it's my turn to see the doctor. Thank you for the stories, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): See you in a few, hun.
An hour or so later:
Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, all set. Pretty stitches in place, prescriptions given... Oh, and Dr. Addison wanted to talk to you.
Vincent (to Poppy): Uh oh. I'm in trouble.
Poppy (to Vincent): She said something about you only coming to visit her when you're hurt... so, yes, you might be in trouble. :-P
Ten minutes later:
Vincent (to Poppy): Ooo. Did I just get an earful! I am expressly forbidden from coming to see her as a patient until she gets a proper visit. I was also reprimanded for not taking better care of myself, giving you home stitches, and not scheduling proper check-ups.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I know what someone is doing sometime soon. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Good gracious I should say so!
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, better you than me, honey... She did seem really nice, so thank you for bringing me here. Shall we go?
Vincent (to Poppy): Yes! Quickly! Before she remembers something else to be angry with me about! Dr. Addison is a peach, even if she can be a bit no nonsense. Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you really do make friends wherever you go, don't you? :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): I am good at charming people. It's the only reason I still work at Drac's, because, let's face it, I'm a DREADFUL bartender.
Poppy (to Vincent): Yes it's quite obvious that your talents clearly lie elsewhere, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Good heavens, you don't have to tell me. However, I'll have you know that I have been practicing.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh... well, that's good, honey... Saved by the bell. I've got a phone call. Just a second, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Why is that the reaction everyone has when I mention mixing drinks? :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, that was an awkward phone call... So, what were we talking about?
Vincent (to Poppy): Is everything OK, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh yes, everything is fine. It was Gavin from work. He's the magician I helped out as assistant last week... He was asking me if I'd like to get coffee sometime & talk about the possibility of me being his assistant full time. Apparently, he & Daisy broke up... She was his former assistant.
Vincent (to Poppy): Ah! Am I correct in assuming the position of "assistant" comes with a romance clause?
Poppy (to Vincent): Apparently... I told him that I was so incredibly flattered, but that I was going to have to decline. He seemed a bit shocked that I said no. I don't think that happens to him often. I mean, he is gorgeous but so egotistical. I'm surprised Daisy put up with him for as long as she did.
Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't blame you for not wanting to work with him even at the least. I hope it doesn't make work awkward for you.
Poppy (to Vincent): It shouldn't, honey. All the girls warned me about him when I started working there. He's only interested because I'm new. Besides, he looks at himself in the mirror a little too much for my taste. If I'm going to be with someone, I'd like them to look at me once in awhile & not treat me like an accessory.
Vincent (to Poppy): I can't blame you one bit, hun. Oh! Speaking of jobs, I owe you and the Gloomies your share of the money we make last night.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, that is music to my ears, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. If you'd rather have it in funds that you can use in Britannia, let me know. But, I thought you had more need of it here.
Poppy (to Vincent): No, this is perfect. If I were to put it into anything back home, Percy might get a hold of it for his own sordid use. And, I earned it fair & square.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Very true, hun. Don't worry, the next trip should be a little more lucrative. This was just an easy peasy run.
Poppy (to Vincent): So, honey, I know you're dying to ask about the picnic, so go ahead ask me anything.
Vincent (to Poppy): I AM curious, I have to admit. Hee. I'm also slightly terrified to ask, if you want to know the truth. Was it dreadful?
Poppy (to Vincent): No, the picnic was like a normal picnic, except with a few differences. Prayers before we ate, bible readings, a few people were abstaining from drinking alcohol & just had lemonade or ice tea. Most of the folks were nice enough if a little culty. Your father was very charming, he went around to all of the new members and said hello... there were a few he lingered with more than others... he held their hand a little too long when he shook them. Your mother was like a Queen Bee flitting around basking in the fact that she was the belle of the ball, so to speak. She loves that fact that your father is so respected by the church & its members... She's the one that's going to hate being knocked down a few pegs.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hmmm. That's quite an astute observation, hun. Believe me, she's going to be the one who gets nasty.
Poppy (to Vincent): I purposely said a scathing remark about a lady's dress within earshot of her & she came over to join in and then next thing I knew she's inviting me to tea. She reminds me of Lady Macbeth.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. OH! Hee hee hee. That is perhaps the most accurate description of my mother I've ever heard. She seems caring and outgoing when she's in public. Privately, she was always rather cold, I suppose. At least towards me. Of course, that could be because I was a divine embarrassment. She was not thrilled with her small, effeminate youngest son.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I don't doubt it. You probably served to remind her that she married a gay man... I mean, your parents do not like each other in the slightest. They performed an avoidance ballet the likes of which I've never seen before. They were always in each other's peripheral vision, but never close to each other the whole time. Even when they were saying goodbye to folks, there was a gap of, at least, two feet between them. I get the impression that your father is doing all of this stuff to make her happy & he thinks he deserves to suffer for the sins he's committed or would like to commit. I'd feel bad for him, if he wasn't such a super duper asshole with an extra helping of douchebag. Pardon my French, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): No offense taken, hun. My dad is... Well, he's complicated. He was equal parts loving, and terrifying. He'd be hitting at me or screaming Bible verses at me one week. And then take me to dinner or bragging to his friends about how good I was in a school play the next. The constant drinking didn't help matter, of course. I never knew if he was going to be angry, or loving.
Poppy (to Vincent): I understand, honey. My father drank a lot after the death of my mother. I don't think he ever recovered from it... Somedays he'd be all rainbows & kittens and then others, yelling at me about what a burden I was & she should have lived. Boy, that got dark fast... now I think we both need a drink.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm sorry, hun. I know how awful that is to hear. And a drink would be wonderful!
Poppy (to Vincent): So, let's talk about something else unless you have any questions about the picnic...
Vincent (to Poppy): I probably will later, sweetie. But for right now, I think I've heard enough. Too many bad memories, I'm afraid.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, at least, we both have the opportunity to make some good memories, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): This couldn't be more true. I'm a very lucky lad. For all the rocky beginnings, I have a wonderful life now.
Poppy (to Vincent): Here's your drink, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Thanks, hun. Here's to leaving shitty times behind, and moving forward to bigger and better things!
Poppy (to Vincent): I'll drink to that!
An hour or so later:
Mouse: Took a nap on the couch, woke up covered in cats... I think I may have to move and find a new place to live.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. That sounds adorable, sweetie! The bitty kitties aren't old enough to walk around yet, are they?
Mouse (to Vincent): No, I think someone piled them on me... I'm not sure who, but I have my suspicions.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I didn't think Gloomy Gus had it in him. Oooo! I hope he took a picture.
Mouse (to Vincent): Yeah, yeah. Don't encourage him... I'm the one who's going to suffer if he gets himself a sense of humor. :-P
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee. I don't know how worried you should be about that, honestly. :-P Oh, oh, OH! I totes have money for you and Mr. Von Gloomenburg!
Mouse (to Vincent): Really? That's great. Do you want to bring it over here or should I come to you?
Vincent (to Mouse): Ummm. You should come here. Yes. You should definitely come here. We may have been drinking. And by "may have been drinking," I mean we are totes sloshed.
Mouse (to Vincent): Oh? I can hold off until tomorrow, I'm in no hurry to get it just yet. Is everything alright?
Vincent (to Mouse): What? A man can't get tipsy in the middle of the day on a Monday... Oh wow. That sounds WAY worse than I thought it would. We're fine. Poppy was telling me about her fun time at the ol' homestead... Oh. Wait. I guess it's NOT the ol' homestead, is it? The picnic! She was telling me about the picnic, and that got us to talking about our parents and that got us to drinking. Now we're watching cartoons and drinking adult beverages with silly straws. Hee hee.
Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, well that definitely sounds like a good day so far. Why don't you stop talking to your sister & spend some quality time with the young lady sitting with you? Or would that be a comment you're going to choose to ignore? :-P
Vincent (to Mouse): Ooo, woman! Aren't you a snarky one today? Tell that stud of yours to put you in a better mood. And for YOUR INFO, I have been spending quality time with Poppy. All day. She's probably sick to death of me by now. So there!
Mouse (to Vincent): HAHAHA! Yes, I am feeling properly shunned, little brother. And, I have a feeling that if Poppy didn't want to spend time with you, I don't think she would.
Vincent (to Mouse): But if you insist on being ignored. Ignore you I shall. Can you feel it? Can you feel the ignoring taking place right now?
Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth have you been drinking? It's been quite awhile since you've been this drunkenly silly.
Vincent (to Mouse): Eh? What's that? I seem to hear something as if someone were speaking to me from a very, very long way away. Almost as if someone I was ignoring were trying to communicate... Hee hee. I'm just kidding. You know I love you. I have NO IDEA what I'm drinking. Poppy has been the bartender because I suck at it. I do seem to be rather on the goofy side. Maybe it's the straw. Ohhhh... Oh. OH! Or she used that rum I got from Captain Birdie. Oh dear.
Mouse (to Vincent): What on earth is a Captain Birdie? (to Poppy) What on earth did you give Vincent to drink? He's been pretty goofy.
Poppy (to Mouse): It's just a Rum Cooler, but we've been drinking it out of silly straws... Have you ever watched a cartoon called Jem?
Mouse (to Poppy): Yes, when I was a kid... Is that what you're watching? You guys are drunker than I thought.
Poppy (to Mouse): Heehee, it's truly outrageous... Oh, now I get the name of the burlesque performer...
Vincent (to Mouse): Captain Birdie is a who, not a what. He gave me a bottle of his "special" home-brewed rum as a thank you. I've never actually consumed it. I was using it as a degreaser... (to Poppy) Hun, did this rum come out of a corked brown bottle? It had a label with a bird on it?
Mouse (to Vincent & Poppy): God, are you two going to need a chaperone?
Poppy (to Vincent): No, honey, it came from a bottle with a squid looking thing... probably a squid.
Vincent (to Mouse): You just want to come over here and drink my hooch. I've intrigued you with my talk of paint-peeling pirate rum. (to Poppy) Ah ha! So that explains... absolutely nothing. I had squid rum? That's amazing!
Mouse (to Vincent): No, if I wanted to drink rum, I'd do it here...
Poppy (to Vincent): Does it, honey? That's wonderful.
Vincent (to Mouse): But is it PIRATE rum? Could it potentially blind you? No! My rum contains adventure! PIRATE ADVENTURE. You can't resist. You can't resist the allure of possibly fatal pirate adventure rum. You know you can't. Are you, Mouse? Are scared of pirate adventure rum?
Mouse (to Vincent): Heehee, do you actually want me to come over and drink your potentially blinding alcohol? I mean, one of us should keep our eyesight... Who will be left to steer the ship?
Vincent (to Poppy): I think my sister is scared of my pirate adventure rum. (to Mouse) Pffft! We let Otto steer the ship. It's probably only a matter of time before he mutinies and takes over the business anyway. Did you realize he went with us the other night? Hee hee. He was super stealthy about it, but he was still there?
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh well, she's missing out on adventure...
Mouse (to Vincent): Yes, I saw him when I went to help Poppy in the hold. We pretended not to see him. I'm sure he was torn between staying at home with his children & protecting me.
Vincent (to Mouse): He's a fur-covered sweetheart despite his foul disposition. Oh my GOD. He's like a cat version of Eep! Ha ha ha! Oh sweet Jesus!
Mouse (to Vincent): Oh god, and he smokes all the time, too... he is a cat version of Eep.
Vincent (to Mouse): Hee hee hee! Oh. Oh God... Well, as long as he doesn't start painting, I think you're alright, sweetie.
Mouse (to Vincent): Speaking of my mister, I should start actually making the dinner, he'll be home shortly.
Vincent (to Mouse): OK. Talk to you later, sweet sister. Enjoy your night. And remember, if it's too boring: pirate adventure rum!
Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, why are you wearing those pirate boots? When did you put those on? Are we playing dress up?
Vincent (to Poppy): These are my pirate adventure rum drinkin' boots. This is the only acceptable footwear for pirate adventure rum.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, I feel completely under-dressed now, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hun, you ALWAYS look fabulous. You know this is fact.
Poppy (to Vincent): You're sweet! I'm going to rummage in your closet, honey...
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! Go ahead, hun. Godspeed! I've got more than a few inexplicable things in there.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I should say so... What on earth is this?
Vincent (to Poppy): Is it the matador ensemble? I STILL don't know where that came from? Oh that? Oh dear Lord... THAT would be from my "bedazzled sweater" collection. I believe those are supposed to be kittens. If you think that's scary, you haven't found the silk cowboy shirts in the back.
Poppy (to Vincent): That is truly terrifying, honey... Oooooh, I found something that I'm putting on right now... If I'm not mistaken it's the evil princess dress from Legend... Now all I need is to kill a unicorn. :-P I think I'm going to wear this dress all the time... You have cowboy shirts? I have got to see them... this closet is huge.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh... Oh my. I will certainly not complain if you do, hun. You look... Wow. And yes. That closet is ridiculous. It's one of the reasons I took this apartment. Cowboy shirts should be towards the back.
Poppy (to Vincent): OH MY GOD! These are hideously awesome! ... Alright, I'm done... I need more rum. Honey, are you okay? If your eyes get any wider, they might fall out of your head.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh, good heavens! I'm sorry, hun. I was staring. That is certainly embarrassing. You cut quite an impressive figure in that dress, and usually I have a bit more tact than that. Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey, I'll forgive you this time since you're drink, I mean, drunk. heehee.
Vincent (to Poppy): At least I'm not drunk alone. Speaking of which... My silly straw is dry. I think we should rectify this and watch more Jem.
Poppy (to Vincent): Honey, you are so smart! That sounds brilliant.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm not about to contradict a beautiful woman in a pretty dress. What I'm going to do is pour her another drink.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I have to admit, honey, I could get used to this kind of treatment... I may have to keep this dress. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! If you want it, hun, it's yours.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, I may need some black lipstick & hair gel... I'll be right back. There, honey, now the costume is complete... heehee. I hear a throat begging to be cut! I will have to wear this to Drac's sometimes.
Vincent (to Poppy): I haven't worn it since the Halloween Delia and I did gender-bent Legend costumes at Drac's. Damn did we make a TON of tips. I guarantee you will not pay for a single drink all night.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I doubt I could be that lucky, honey. What did you make this time, it tastes different?
Vincent (to Poppy): I don't doubt it. This DOES taste odd, doesn't it? Oh shit! Spit it out, hun! I wasn't paying attention when I poured and it's got Captain Birdie's rum in it.
Poppy (to Vincent): Good god, honey, that tastes like the rotgut my brothers used to make in our backyard.
Vincent (to Poppy): It's probably the same recipe. Captain James Birdie isn't known for his refined tastes. Ugh! We're lucky we can still see. Let me get us something a bit more palpable.
Poppy (to Vincent): Are you hungry, honey? I'm feeling a little peckish.
Vincent (to Poppy): Mmm. I probably SHOULD eat. I think I've hit the amount of alcohol my frame can handle without food. Ooo! Do you want to catch the bus into town, go to dinner dressed like this, and scare the shit out of the straights?
Poppy (to Vincent): But, of course, honey! That's always so much fun.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Let me go pirate myself up a little bit more then. I think I need a sash and shirt with FAR more ruffles.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh yes... I need to put on some shoes. Can we go get sushi?
Vincent (to Poppy): Sushi would be PERFECT. Let me know when you're properly shod, and we'll be off. Do you need something warm to throw over that dress, hun? I think I have the perfect accessory.
Poppy (to Vincent): Alright, honey, I didn't have any proper shoes to go with it, so I went with boots. Really? This collar makes coats a wee bit difficult.
Vincent (to Poppy): Boots are always appropriate. And with a dress like that, you skip the jacket all together and go for a cloak. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Oooh, that is lovely... And, you look magnificent. Just like Errol Flynn in The Sea Hawk. If I wasn't starving... Well, you can probably guess what I'd like to do.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh my. I can take several guesses and I like the way all of them end. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, if we hurry back, maybe, we can end the evening that way? ;-)
Vincent (to Poppy): Well, my goodness. Are you trying to seduce me, Miss Poppy?
Poppy (to Vincent): I certainly hope so... Is it working?
Vincent (to Poppy): In spades. Hee hee. You don't really go much for innuendo, do you?
Poppy (to Vincent): Why bother with innuendo, honey, when straight talk works so much better?
Vincent (to Poppy): I certainly can't argue with that, hun.
Mouse (to Eep): Hey there mister man! How was work?
Eep (to Mouse): Pretty good, actually. I didn't get into a single argument all day. Personal record. How's your day been?
Mouse (to Eep): Good & quiet...Well, except for the waking up from my nap with all the cats on me. You wouldn't happen to know how that happened?
Eep (to Mouse): ALL the cats were on you? Huh. Wow. That's weird.
Mouse (to Eep): Really? Am I supposed to believe that you didn't do it?
Eep (to Mouse): Um... Yes?
Mouse (to Eep): Heehee, you didn't take a photo, did you?
Eep (to Mouse): Shit! No. I didn't think of it. Damn. Oh, I mean, uhhh... I don't know what you're talking about.
Mouse (to Eep): Oh good... I'm glad you don't know anything about it... Food's ready. I, uh, tried my hand at empanadas. I hope they turned out okay.
Eep (to Mouse): You did what? Wow. I'm... Wow. Heh. I'm surprised you wanted to try them with as often as I chased you outta the kitchen.
Mouse (to Eep): Well, it WAS a lot easier without you smacking my hand. You can be brutally honest about them, I'd like your opinion.
Eep (to Mouse): Wow... You went a little lighter on the seasoning in the meat than I would have, but the crust... What did you do to the crust? It... Holy shit. It tastes just like the way my mom used to make them. What did you do differently?
Mouse (to Eep): I used a combination of butter & shortening for the crust. I thought it might give it a better taste & I figured traditional recipes wouldn't use shortening.
Eep (to Mouse): Huh. Wow. I'm knocked on my ass here. These are delicious.
Mouse (to Eep): You really like them? I was nervous about making them. I won't step on your toes, as I know you like to make them. But, I just wanted to see if I could.
Eep (to Mouse): No! No. It's not that. I'm probably making a weird ass face, huh?
Mouse (to Eep): Yeah, a little.
Eep (to Mouse): I like them! It's just, uh, heh... No one has made empanadas for me in a really long time, is all. It's dumb, but it was a big deal when my mom made them when I was little. That's all. Sorry. These are really good.
Mouse (to Eep): Oh... it's not dumb. I just wanted to make them for you. I didn't think about your mom. I'm sorry.
Eep (to Mouse): That wasn't a complaint, you know. This is amazing. Thank you. It's nice. Really nice. It's... Heh. It's not something I can explain without feeling like a huge dickhead. So, thanks. I love you, you empanada making gringa.
Mouse (to Eep): I love you too, you foul mouthed grumpy ass.
A couple hours later:
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you'd think I looked scary the way all of the other bus patrons have taken up sitting as far away as possible.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I'm assuming it's because they're afraid they won't be able to contain their lust for you. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, someone just pinched my butt... I hope it was you, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): It wasn't me, hun. And, I'm guessing you weren't the one who goosed me either. Good heavens.
Poppy (to Vincent): Who knew that riding on the bus was such an adventure? I'm glad we have rum back at the house.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I always have good ideas with you, hun. Oh my... I think perhaps having a saké at the restaurant was a bad idea.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, you're drunk again, honey... Or wait, is it still?
Vincent (to Poppy): I don't think I ever regained soberness. Is soberness a word? Soberness is a word now! SOBERNESS IS TOTES NOW A WORD.
Poppy (to Vincent): So, what you're saying is now would be a great time to ask you questions... of which I cannot think of any to ask. Damn. This dress was much easier to maneuver in before. heehee. And it was way easier to get in then getting out seems to be… I think it's a trap. I'm going to be like one of those cartoon characters forever stuck in the same clothes...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, if you're looking to get out of that dress, hun, I'm more than willing to help you. Out of the goodness of my heart, of course.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh that would be helpful, honey... don't peek.
Vincent (to Poppy): I will be a perfect gentleman. Until you ask me not to be. Hee hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): I wouldn't go that far, honey... I like scoundrels.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. You must like me because I'm a scoundrel. There aren't enough scoundrels in your life...
Poppy (to Vincent): I happen to like nice men.
Vincent (to Poppy): I'm nice...
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee… Did it just get really warm in here?
Vincent (to Poppy): Whew. More than a bit. Do you want something else to drink? I think I should probably get some water in me at this point.
Poppy (to Vincent): Water would be good with lots of ice.
Vincent (to Poppy): Here you go, hun. How are you feeling?
Poppy (to Vincent): I'm feeling alright. Heehee, I think the waiter gave you his phone number on the receipt for the sushi, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): He did? Well. So, he did. What's this little drawing he added at the bottom? Oh good heavens! THAT'S explicit. Well, now I know WHY he gave me his phone number. Oh my... Hee hee.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh my... I wonder if that's an offer? heehee. You should call him, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. That's alright, hun. I think I'd rather date someone who asked me out in person rather than draws dirty pictures on receipts.
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee. Really, honey?
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh good heavens, no. I've already done the horrible, shameful hookup thing. I'd rather avoid making THAT mistake again. Heh. Especially right now with all this bullshit that's going on with my parents.
Poppy (to Vincent): Well, then I guess I shouldn't give you this silly doodle I was drawing, then. :-P
Vincent (to Poppy): Ha ha ha! No. No, I'm afraid I can't accept this. You'll have to ask me to do that in person like a civilized person. :-P
Poppy (to Vincent): Heehee, I'm not even sure what it's called, honey.
Vincent (to Poppy): Let me take a better look at that. Oh. I'm not sure what that's called either. Good heavens. Is that position even possible?
Poppy (to Vincent): I saw it in a book once.
Vincent (to Poppy): Clearly, it made an impression. I don't know that we could do that without pulling out your stitches.
Poppy (to Vincent): It's okay, honey. I was just teasing, anyway... I was just inspired by the receipt graffiti.
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. Well, you can't blame a lad for being hopeful.
Poppy (to Vincent): What pray tell are you hopeful about, honey? I think I've made it perfectly clear that all you have to do is ask.
Vincent (to Poppy): Oh. Yes, you have, hun. I...uh. Good heavens. When did I get this awkward?
Poppy (to Vincent): I don't know... You seemed much more confident & smooth when you thought I was PoppyBot.
Vincent (to Poppy): Sorry, hun. In a way, after I found out she was an automaton, things were a bit less complicated with PoppyBot. I like you quite a bit more, so I guess I'm a bit more nervous... Oh good heavens! I am CLEARLY too drunk to speak.
Poppy (to Vincent): Oh, heehee, you don't have to be nervous, honey. I like it when you speak your mind. Besides, I like you quite a bit, too...
Vincent (to Poppy): Hee hee. I guess you do like scoundrels, after all. So... Um, would you like to join me in the bedroom, hun?
Poppy (to Vincent): I thought you'd never ask, honey.
